pg after mc and feeling really nervous

[BellaBearisWideAwake]

Hi, haven't posted regularly on MN for ages but really need to chat to someone

I've just found out I am pg (not even four weeks yet, but absolutely exhausted and sore boobs and EXTREMELY faint line). This is my fourth pg: one mc, one full term (= 2.6yo DS)and then another mc (particularly nasty 12 week missed mc involving EPRC that didn't work), so I know the symptoms.

I'm just really nervous! I want to tell everyone and talk about it loads, but a) it's ridiculously early days, b) I think I've reached my capacity for untelling if it goes wrong after last time and c) DH is really nervous too and is wary of talking.

Add to this I am bone-shatteringly exhausted and on holiday from school so looking after DS full time. I've been having naps all weekend, but not an option tomorrow when DH is at work.

Anhyway, if anyone reads this could you just say 'hello, I've read this, you are normal, carry on' - I would very much appreciate it!

My posting name is very very incorrect! I used to be BellaBear.

Perhaps I should change to BellaBearNeedsYetAnotherNap

hi bella, you are 100% normal .

there are a few threads on here atm with ladies who have miscarried and are now pg again.

i'm pg after 4 rmc so i know how you are feeling.

just take it one day at a time.

where you ever given a reason for your mc?

Hello. I've read this, you are normal, carry on.

Honestly, I have been/am at where you are now.

I have had two miscarriages before and am now 18 weeks pregnant.

Especially at the beginning I was sooooo stressed and worried about a miscarriage. As each milestone was reached I felt a little bit calmer...each scan, hearing the heatbeat, each extra week.

I had 2 bright red bleeds at 8 and 9 weeks which didn't help at all.

My only advice would be to do everything my the book, take the vitamins, rest when you can etc. That really is the only thing you can 'control' at this time.

I told my two closest friends that I was pregnant as soon as I knew and told them about my fears of miscarriage. They understood and were far better at discussing than my boyfriend. He just always assumed it would all work out fine this time. I am sure this is his way of trying to be strong for me, but I didn't find it that helpful in the early stages.

I still knicker-check every time I go to the loo, but feel stronger and more confident now than I ever had. I am now asusming that it will all go to plan and am thinking about the future assuming little one will come along, not assumimg it will all go wrong, as I did at the beginning.

I guess its just the passage of time that has changed how I feel, and I am sure the same will happen for you. Just remember for every person you know/hear/read about where things have gone wrong there are lots more who have a happy healthy baby at the end of it all.

Best of luck and....CONGRATUALTIONS!!!

Hi mumatron, thanks for replying

I'm not very good with mass threads, I always lose my way.

No, no reasons, but very common in my mum's family to have one mc beofre each pg. Fun, fun fun.

Congratulations on your pg!

Thanks Duke748, I appreciate that!

I felt very similar with my second pg, that resulted in DS. I didn't really relax the whole 37 weeks! It got better once I felt movement though.

Wish I could fastforward twenty weeks!

ah, i follwed my mums pattern aswell! although i will be stopping now as she tried for one more and ended up having loads more mc

well, fwiw i am now 18 weeks and with abit of medical help and alot of support here and in rl i am slowly getting to the point of feeling like i might actually have this baby.

will keep my fingers crossed very firmly for you.

Give it time -take it easy. There is absolutely nothing you can do to change the outcome. 12 week mc's are horrendus and dramatically different to 6/7 weeks-I've done both.
I didn't stop knicker checking until a few weeks ago-I'm now 38 weeks.
Your right - Its easy to tell people you are pregnant but bloody hard to tell them you are not, so my best advice is to tell your best mate and then suck it in for a while.
Best of luck

Bella - many congratulations. You ARE normal... well as normal as the next one...

I am 9 weeks tomorrow on pg#4; DS 2yo2m, MMC@13w, MMC@11w. This pg didn't start that well with lots of spotting, and I've been very resistant to even believing that I'm pg at all.

But FX for us both. Rest as much as you can...ha ha with a 2 year old....

KEEP CALM AND CARRY ON X

Congrats bella, I had a mmc last year and then got unexpectedly pg four weeks later so was v v nervous about everything. But it felt different and I did have an early scan because of the previous mc. Can you ask your gp? I know that will be another 4 weeks but better than 8?

Other than that, hang on in there.

Thank you! I really appreciate the messages. I know everything you are all saying, but it makes a difference that someone else apart from me is saying it

I think I will ring my GP tomorrow, despite my period not being due till Wednesday - the senior GP in the practice told me to get in the system as soon as is possible next time, to see if they can wangle an early scan. I think seeing something will really help.

My missed mc wasn't pleasant - I bled at ten weeks, had a scan that showed it was a mc, couldn't have an ERPC till eleven weeks when I bled very heavily, thought it was all over and then had a bleeding episode in the park at 12 weeks that was so bad I had to have a friend pick me and DS up and had to throw away all my clothes. The GP said the ERPC didn't work, and that that was my mc. I refer to it as 'The bloodbath in Clarence Park'

Hi Bella,

I am in a similar situation to you, had a mmc in March and then got pregnant straight away after first period. I am now ten weeks and still checking my knickers 4-5 times per day. I am so nervous about 12 week scan but trying to keep myself busy and be positive. There is nothing we can do but try and look after ourselves and distract ourselves from the worry.

Wishing you the best of luck!

Hi All

I'm in this normal club too! I've had 3 MC and have a DD.

I managed to get an early 8 week scan, which made me feel better and then had 12 week scan last week. Although I'm still on tenter hooks the 8 week scan did help me get through to the 12 week.

I've just started telling people this week and I'm feeling quiet panicky about it. I really understand where you're coming from on the untelling.

Prior to the 12 week scan I told my mum and best friend as they are the people who would have been my support if things hadn't gone this far.

I too wish you the very best of luck. There really should be some sort of a time machine for those of us unlucky enough to have successive miscarriages. However, I am writing this one handed whilst feeding my beautiful 3 week old daughter who is living proof of the most positive outcome after losing previous babies and despairing that you will ever get to a point where you will get to hold and care for one of your own. Wishing you all the very best x

Congratulations BellaBear

I'm keeping everything crossed for you, and yes you are normal!

I've had one MC 4 years ago and then a DD (3). I panicked and worried the whole way through my pregnancy with DD.

I'm now 10 weeks pregnant with what will (hopefully) be DC2, trying to be positive but still knicker checking every 5 minutes. DP keeps rolling his eyes at me!

I'm past the stage which I miscarried at so hopefully this is it. I'm determined to enjoy this pregnancy as we won't be having anymore after this one! Everyday is a bonus!

I really hope everything goes well for you and you have a healthy and uneventful pregnancy!

Hi Bella,

CONGRATULATIONS!

I am also just pregnant following a mc at 9 weeks last year. I think I am 5weeks today, I am also terrified, I am going to my GP later to ask for an early scan at the local EPU. I think feeling anxious after what you have been through is totally normal.

I hope everything goes well for you. x

Thank you everyone. Your comments really do help. Told some of my friends today (the kind who looked after DS last mc), which has helped.

Know what you mean about the time machine!

I have everything crossed fou you bella I hope this one is super sticky and the only bloodbath is in 36 weeks time xx

nomore, you are so sweet glad to see your laptop is back up to speed! xx

it's not really back - it took me 10 mins to post that! Think a defrag might be in order

CONGRATULATIONS!!

You are normal, carry on.

Welcome to the rollercoaster of pregnancy post mc - here's to an easy approx. 36 weeks of pregnancy to come...

xx

Hello Gilly How are you?

Gilly!!!! HellloooooO!!!

Well, I've done a positive test, so that's good, and off on holiday today so packed loads of always ultra, as a tempt of fate

Thanks again to everyone who has posted kind words

Hi bella Just wondering how you are? Hope all's well. x