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potty training 3 year old - should we persevere?

4 replies

SoTiredOfTheWheelsOnTheBus · 08/05/2010 12:00

This is a pretty long post, sorry. DS is 3. Over the last few months, there has been a potty in the bathroom for him to see/play with, we've read stories about boys and their potties and in the last couple of weeks he sat on it happily (but just to sit, no wees or anything). He's followed us to the loo for ages, and we've had talks about 'when you are a big boy, you can do your wees in the potty' etc.

I've got a couple of days off work this week, and decided to start training in earnest. On Thursday morning we had a talk - today you're going to wear big boy pants, and will be sitting on the potty. If you need to do a wee, then sit on the potty. If he does a wee in the potty, he gets a sticker on his chart. I've been putting him on it about every half hour. The first day, he had 5 accidents on the floor (he got a bit upset, but I didn't make a fuss, just cleaned it up and said next time we'll try to do it on the potty), but in the late afternoon he took himself to the potty and did a wee in it by himself (cue lots of lavish praise, choosing a sticker for his chart, phoning dh to tell him, etc.). Friday there were still lots of accidents, but a couple of times he did a wee in the potty (probably more fluke than anything, because each time I had to put him on the potty, he didn't take himself). He did ask yesterday afternoon to go back into nappies, and I said no, he was wearing his big boy pants. Then, being contrary, he got a bit upset at bedtime when I put him in pull-ups, not pants, to go to bed. Today, we've had 7 accidents in the last 3 hours. He just seems to be doing lots of very small wees (sorry for the detail, but just enough to wet his pants so he needs changing), but nothing on the potty. I asked him if he wanted to go back into nappies, and he said no, he wanted his big boy pants on.

I thought he was ready for potty training, and because I had 5 days at home with him before he's back at nursery, thought it would be a good time to try. We normally go out a couple of times a day, but I've cancelled everything for the next couple of days to keep us around the house. The question is, should I persevere now, or accept he's not yet ready, and try again in a couple of weeks? The idea of having to do this again in a couple of weeks does fill me with dread, partly because of the constant vigilance, continual mopping up, and the sheer amount of washing so far involved, but also because rather than going out and getting stressed about car journies, etc. we'll be staying around the house and cancelling play groups, etc.

Am I being unrealistic to think that by day 3, there would be more wees in the potty than on the floor? I'm not expecting him to be completely dry in between potty sessions, but I didn't expect this level on 'constant leakage!' I realise that it's not something that 'clicks' in a day or two, but should I be expecting a bit more success by this stage, or do we just continue?

Any words of advice/wisdom will be gratefully received

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cookielove · 08/05/2010 12:15

I would continue, especially as he says he wants to wear big boy pants, you could say to him if he gets so many stickers (of your choosing) at the end of the day or week he gets a small toy, or bag of sweets or whatever.

When putting on the pull up on at bed/nap time i would say we only wear this for sleep times, but it comes off straight after, and once you take it off put him straight on the potty.

I wouldn't be worried about the fact that your taking him and he's not taking himself as it is early days and it takes a while for them to understand the sensation.

androbbob · 10/05/2010 21:46

We tried at christmas - for 7 days and was a little like you described. DS was 2 and 10 months then. After 7 long days I threw in the towel and accepted that he was stubbon! One day he was up for it but again did lots of little wees on the potty and then wet his pants.

Roll on Saturday just gone and DS is now 3 and 3 months - following using pull ups for a month and the child minder sticking him on the loo when the others wanted, we started in earnest. No nappies, no fuss - first wee on daturday morning - huge sucess, then a bit stop start over the day and ended up with 6 changes of underwear!

Sunday and today we have had one change - lots of trips to the potty but all have been aat his request. We have been monitoring his drinks to see how long they take to get through - about 45 minutes it seems! The big test will be three days at the childminders from tomorrow!

Only you will know if he is ready, but I would recommend trying for 5 days and if no improvement then leave it for a while.

Good luck!

zapostrophe · 10/05/2010 21:51

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SoTiredOfTheWheelsOnTheBus · 11/05/2010 09:40

Thanks for the advice. We did persevere over the weekend - he seems to be a bit of a leaky tap - lots of very small dribbles (just enough to wet his pants so he needs to be changed, but not enough to make a mess). Six changes of underwear, androbob! We had 15 pairs of pants in the washing machine yesterday!

He has had more success with the potty - only very occasionally taking himself there, but generally we've still been trying to get him to sit down every 30 minutes. Had a period yesterday where he was completely dry (no drips or anything) for 3 hours, then did a huge wee in the potty (cue lots of cheering in the SoTired household!). I think he is getting there (on Sunday and Monday we consecutively had more clean pairs of pants left at the end of the day), but today will be a test as he's back at nursery. Keep your fingers crossed for us!

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