Can I potty train part time?

[tortoiseonthehalfshell]

I want to start potty training. If she's not ready, I'll stop and try again later, it's not a big deal, but various things make me think that she's in a good 'window' of development to be receptive to it. Also we've got another couple of months of warm weather I'd like to take advantage of.

I spend 3 days a week at home with my daughter, 2 of which we're solo and 1 is family day. She spends another 2 days a week with her Dad, 1/2 a day with her Nana (my mum) and 2 days in nursery. I realise that doesn't make 7, but I'm trying to be succinct.

My Mum is happy to be on board with training.
My husband isn't - he thinks it's too soon, and TBH he doesn't want the inconvenience of having to stay home for long. I don't know how nursery feels about it but can ring and ask (husband does dropoff/pick up so I don't get to chat to them much).

Will it work if she's only training on the days I'm home with her or she's with her Nan? Or do all of her carers have to do exactly the same thing?

Hi, When DD was toilet training I worked full time so she spent 2 days with my mum, 3 days at nursery and the weekend with me and DH. Nursery were not supportive really as DD was under 2.

It worked for us, we started on the first day she wasn't in nursery so she had 5 days of no nappies, then when she went to nursery she went in pants but with a supply of nappies and loads of spare clothes. I left instructions that if she had an accident she would be asked if she wanted pants or nappy and no pressure or stress would be put on her. Nursery were about it and both days she came back in a nappy.

However, after another few days at home / with my mum the next nursery visit was more successful and from then on nappies were gone.

I think the key is to remain relaxed and flexible. If a nappy has to go on when she is with her dad then don't stress about it at first, as long as she is getting supportive guidance from you and nana she prob wont need nappies with him after a couple of weeks.

Good luck!

Thanks, that's really reassuring.

I think with potty training it really has to be all or nothing, otherwise its unfair on the child. You need to put your child in pants and if no progress is made in the first week then go back to nappies.

A child needs consistancy in all areas of life. Potty training is no different.

I imagine that the nursery are in the best position to assess whether a child is ready for potty training.

I will say what I always say on PT threads

If you wait for her to tell you she wants to ditch nappies you will cut down on the major part of PT hassle all-round

DD1 was potty trained (at her own initiative) before age 2. I followed her lead, and was prepared to put it on hold and try again later if it wasn't working after a few days. But because DD1 was keen and ready, she got the hang of it very quickly.

I would have thought that parents are in the best position to judge whether a child is ready for potty training, not a nursery where the child may only spend 2 days a week.

OP, try PeasPlease approach and see how you get on. Agree with her that if you remain relaxed and open-minded you will help your DD to also feel positive about the whole thing.

What counts as her telling you? I know I'm thick . DD is 2.2 and has been happy to go on the potty for wees since about 14 months (we had one hanging round for her to get used to seeing, no pressure). Over the last month, since she?s had slight constipation issues, she tells us when she wants to do a poo and asks for the potty. But I don?t know if this is because pooing was hurting her or what. If I?m honest I?m trying to put off potty training for the same sort of reasons as the op. I work 3 days a week, she?s at nursery one day and the each grandmother on the other days. It?s very bitty and I was hoping to wait until she literally put the pants on and dumped the nappies in the bin herself!

Also, if she is ready, is there any harm in putting her off for a bit? Sorry for thread hijack btw...

Rockbird - dd2 told me (at about 2.7) "I want to wear knickers today"

So she did. Had one wee accident that day. I think a poo accident on day 3 maybe? But that was it - clean and dry since

Before that she had been happy to use the potty when running around naked

We started at Christmas when DD was 2.5 and was at home with me and DH. lots of remindingand lots of accidents so stopped again. 2 weeks later .she went back to her cm 2.5 days per week. I was dressing her on the second morning and she refused to wear a nappy- insisted on pants. She's now dry and clean in the day so you can try it and be prepared to stop if necessary.

I totally disagree that nurseries know what is best for a child. Their policies are in place for there own ease and convenience. It wasn't the case that the nursery was unsupportive of my decision because my DD was not ready, it was because they have a policy of no training before a child is 2 - for ANY child. They stated it was because it takes less time the longer you wait.

If your DD can stay dry for naps and can speak and understand words associated with toilet stuff then go for it if that's what you want. As long as you are always consistent with her and it doesn't all start to upset her then where is the harm?

Thanks all.

My instinct, as a clueles first time mum, is that if it's not a big deal to me (it's not, I just get some signals from her now so thought it was worth a shot) then we can give it a try and see what happens. I'm not going to push her into anything. I'm very much an 'on demand' sort of mum, so have no reason to assume I'll miss her distress if it happens.

As for nursery, it's just that they have different rooms for the different age groups, and like PP they don't think about toilet training till over 2. I can talk to them, but it might be tricky for the carers in the under-2 room to really be looking out for my daughter if the other kids there aren't there yet. Especially because the bigger/physically advanced 18-mo-olds get moved up to the 2 year old room earlier, it's really a 'baby room'.

Stupid question, PP - how do I know if she stays dry for naps? Change her just before and check her just after? I do know that I can usually let her run around naked for up to an hour without worrying about it.

Get this book:

"Potty Training Girls" by Simone Cave and Dr Caroline Fertleman.

I loved it (it's available on Amazon), I managed to get it from the library.

It is great for those of us who can't/won't for whatever varying reasons try and do it the more traditional ways.

It's fab if you can't take a whole week to stay in the house with your dc. It works if your dc is only at home some days or you work ft and only at home a day or two per week.

I loved this book. There is an equivalent for boys too afaik.

Have ordered it lollipop. If it's rubbish I'll be back for ya!

I loved it, honestly.

It was so much more realistic (imo) than all of this "take a week off work and stay at home all the time.

Before getting this book I realised I would have to ring in sick/wait until next financial year to potty train dd2 if I used the "training in a week" or similar method!

I really didn't have time to invest a whole week or more in arguing with dd about potties potty training.

Yep, I was contemplating taking time off for potty training . Can think of 100000 other things I'd rather do with my annual leave. TBH, time is the only thing stopping me as I think DD is ready. So I'm open to alternative methods.

If they "get it" quickly then you won't need to take a week off work. Like others, I really think it is all about timing ie. if they are ready. We were out and about every day.

These pants are ideal if you want them to feel the wet but without destroying your local library's carpet: bambino mio training pants
Actually, I think these gave me a lot of confidence, meaning we roamed quite far- even going to a MN event at the House of Commons when DD was only 8 days out of nappies!

And in answer to the question about how you know they are ready, we knew DD was ready because she told us "No nappy please, I want to wear pants like ." Since then she has amassed many chocolate buttons and stickers and is very happy. I wouldn't say there are no accidents but far fewer then I expected. If the timing is right it doesn't necessarily have to be 7 days of hell in one room with them on the potty 24/7.

You can absolutely potty train "part-time." Children cotton on quickly to one routine for mum, one for dad, one at nursery, etc. When you've not cleaned a pooey nappy in weeks and your DH is chiselling and scraping poo off her bum every day he'll get with the program.

I totally agree ches.

Potty training 2.5 yr old girl. I am on day 7 of PT, she will sit on potty/toilet no problem when I put her on. She can generally go for about 2 hrs before a wee, but despite me putting the potty next to her and reminding her (not nagging) she will sit in the chair/play and wet herself. She makes no attempt to ask to go and she is able to ask as she has on one occasiion (before I started training - as she was in pull ups that she wanted to go!!) I have tried bribery in the form of stickers choc. buttons etc but to no avail. I am happy that she is ready and have 5 more days left before I go back to work as I took time off to try and get her trained. I read today that I should not continue to keep putting her on and for her to take the lead - when I asked her to use the potty today before tea she replied that she could wee on the chair!! I think she knows exactly what she is doing but am a little frustrated in how to deal with it - do I just keep putting her on every time hrs in the hope she gets it or leave her to take the lead??.

Thanks

What do you want to do? Choose that and be consistent.

I would put her back into nappies/pull-ups and do regular toilet trips; e.g. before/after nap/bed and before/after leaving the house. I would also go back to work or you'll feel like you're wasting your leave.

Iwant to potty train her am not going back now and unfortunately I will have to go to work! Thanks for replying.