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Potty training

Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

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Original poster

DAY 6! PLEASE at what stage do you give up?

12 replies

carpenter75 · 22/02/2010 20:06

I am really in two minds as to whether to go back in nappies tomorrow or keep going. DD is 2.8 and we've been potty training for 6 days. She loves the idea of wearing pants and has really had quite a lot of success, not many wee accidents at all after the first day. But for her to go for a wee often takes 2 or 3 attempts at sitting on the potty (she will now say she needs to go). She is crying and getting very upset, sits down for a minute and then jumps up almost immediately without doing anything. Reading stories or TV didn't even work tonight. So basically every time she goes, it's a bit of a trauma for her (and getting that way for me now).

We are also having issues with poo. She did one poo in the potty on day 3 without any fuss and was extremely pleased with herself. After that she witheld her poo for 48 hrs (her diet is great so 100% a behavioural thing) and since yesterday has relaxed again but is now pooing in her pants.

If it was just the poo issue, I'd carry on as I know it's a common problem. But the fact that she's so traumatised about letting go of a wee is getting a bit much after this number of days. Is this normal? ANY advice at all would be very welcome.

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Original poster

carpenter75 · 22/02/2010 21:34

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OP posts:

Keeny · 23/02/2010 00:22

my daughter was trained at 2.8 also, she is now 3.9. She too loved wearing pants but would not pee in the potty or toilet. We use to give her a lolly & sit her on the potty in front of the tv to distract her thoughts!. She held it in that long her tummy swelled. I looked up the internet for some ideas and found a sticker (Black Sticker) that you stick into the bottom of the potty. When ur child wee's on it the sticker lights up and a face/star appears on the sticker to encourage a fun way for ur child to wee. It's called My Wee Friend. www.myweefriend.com. When the wee goes cold, the sticker goes black again. I bought one at a local stockist for less than £2.00. When we got it home I stuck it into the potty and poured warm water onto it to let her see what happens, she thought it was brilliant and kept asking to show the animal face. We let her know that in order for her to see it she must go for a wee, after a while she did, and loved it. She wouldn't poo in the potty for a long time, she did it in her pants for a while and I told her that she would get a favourite treat each time she poo'd in the loo/potty, after a few accidents, she'd ask for her treat and we explained when she would get it. Eventually, she copped on and kept getting her favourite treat after each poo in the toilet. 6months later she was wearing her pants to bed at night. My nephew turned 3yr and is now being potty trained, his mum was going through the same thing and I told her to get the sticker, she got it on Saturday and he is weeing away in the potty, but poo'ing in his pants, which is normal as it takes children a bit longer to poo in the loo/potty. I hope this may be of some help to you.

Keeny · 23/02/2010 00:32

sorry, alternatively if that doesn't work or if u are not able to get a sticker you could wait until the warmer weather comes in and let your daughter run around outside in pants and old shorts/joggers and let her wet herself, let her stay like that until she comes and tells u that she's wet, change her and let her go back out again and eventually she will not like being wet and will tell you when she needs to go. It's a bit too cold to do that now, she could get a kidney infec or a chill. I forgot to say that it took over a week for us to potty train our little girl, but after we bought the sticker it was very soon. If u are stressed ur daughter will sense it. I was a bit at the start as I had a new baby to look after too. She'll get there though. Keep praising her.

nappyaddict · 23/02/2010 02:41

One piece of advice I saw on here was to get boys boxers for girls rather than pants. Pants are quite close fitting and feel similar to a nappy, so they wee in them. I think that's one of the reasons a lot of children will often use the potty or toilet when they have no bottoms on but once they have pants on they think it's like a nappy and don't bother.

ben5 · 23/02/2010 05:50

the sticker sounds fab. sorry no real advice because mine were tained over the summer when they just ran around naked!!! i remember it taking moe than a week. i would ask them if they would like nappies or pants and by the time september came they were both potty trained. they are both november babies so were nearly 3 by the time they got sorted!!!!!!

Original poster

carpenter75 · 23/02/2010 20:05

Thanks for the replies, the sticker does sound a good idea. I kept her in pants today and she has been a bit calmer. I think we'll get there in the end but it will be a longer process than I'd hoped.

OP posts:

nappyaddict · 24/02/2010 02:12

Remember she's still quite young. A lot of people I know don't even start potty training until their child is over 3.6 (unless the child suggests they want to do it sooner of course) DS is 3.8 and not potty trained yet. I am hoping he will get it by the time he is 3.10

Chellesgirl · 24/02/2010 13:22

well carpenter its possible shes just scared of 'letting go'...

when toddlers start to potty train they have all the first excitement around..the clapping and happy faces and some children dont actually realise what they have done. maybe cause they have started a little bit too early. Your dd sounds like shes just realised that her wee and poo actually do come out of her body - and though it may sound simple to us -you eat, you poo..to her its complex and scary.

Have you tried a toilet seat and not a potty so that she can flush the poo away straight away? Shes old enough to have a step, to step up to the toilet and sit on this colourful seat 'just for girls'.

My dd is 2.1 and has started to potty train. At 1.9 she did a poo and wee on the toilet. She didnt have a clue what it was..but since then she was really interested in people going for a 'weewee' and I let her come to the toilet with me when she wanted, shed get the tissue, put it down the toilet and then flush the chain.

some families dont use nappies at all and use and use the 'process of elimination' from 6 months old. Now in our hectic lives that may be inpossible, but relieving ourselves is natural and if you can make is a natural ass possible for your dd things will most likely look up.

My dd doesnt wear a nappy in the day. I have the heater on downstairs and the heating, just to provide a little extra warmth and she just wears socks and a long sleeved top. the potty goes in the middle of the living room and everytime she needs a wee, she goes to it. Weve been doing it for the passed 3 days constantly with no accidents, but previously she would have a couple accidents and wee on the living room floor. My trick was - not even give her any attention what so ever -and she just went to the potty, sat on it and weed and weve been doing it ever since. once shes weed, we do a lil happy dance, lasts about 5 seconds before shes bored and goes off to play..but it worked for us. and you have to find something that works for your dd.
You say you think shes witholding poo through a behavioural reason...I remember having a little girl at a nursery that did this. she was 4 and still wouldnt do a poo, her mom couldnt understand why. so I told her to leave the landing light on at night so (as the little girl was scared of the dark) and to not hug her and tell her its ok all the time when she didnt want to do a poo. The little girl picked up on the fact her mum was a pushover and wouldnt tell her off if she pood her knickers. so witht he parents permission we agreed that we would leave her in her wet clothes for 15 minutes or till she told us (whichever was the sooner), wed also take her at certain intervals in the day without fail, even if she refused she would have to stand in the toilet area for 5 minutes. I told her mom to just give her tough love and shed soon come around...within 1 weeks she was fully on the toilet and weeing and pooing with no fuss.

sorry for such a long thread

CakeForBreakfast · 26/02/2010 20:07

Hello Carpenter

Is it possible your daughter getting upset with the wees is still a poo issue?...

... I have been potty training my dd (2.6) for a week and a half and she is dry wee-related. Poos are being held as long as possible and then done in the pants, BUT, when she does want a poo, she gets upset doing a wee too (because she is trying to hold back the poo I think), and is uncomfortable and keeps trying to stop and stand up. once she has done a poo, the wees are trauma free (until the next time!...)

I hope it resolves itself soon, once you have some success and make the jump to big girl pants, it feels like no going back doesn't it?

Best of luck

Chellesgirl · 26/02/2010 23:28

and that cake is why my dd doesnt wear pants! after looking after sooo many children and helping them to potty train in nurseries and in thier own home - theres only so much more poo in pants one can take!

Luckily tho, even though dd was a lil bit unsure of doing a poo in the potty, somehow today she managed it without even a wimper - and then...she went to empty in on the floor [sigh]

cloudbaby · 28/02/2010 15:05

Maybe leave her without pants and let her wear some babylegs to keep her legs warm: www.totnesnappycompany.co.uk/shop/Online_Catalogue_BabyLegs_38.html

follygirl · 09/03/2010 11:46

I tried to potty train my ds when he was 3 as he is a summer baby. It was a complete disaster and after 4 days I gave up before I cracked up!
I left it until October (not the best time of year I know) but he took to it really well and was dry after only a few days. Unfortunately still not doing poos in the toilet but that's my fault as I lost it when he did one in the bath .
I'm not stressing him about doing poos. He waits until he has his night-time nappy on and then does one. I'll give him until the summer and then try again.

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