Dropping the nappies at night time

[rookiemater]

DS is 3.10 and has been in pants for day time for about a year now.

His nappies in the morning have always been wet, but then I get up every night to go to the loo at least once so if he has inherited my bladder we could be waiting a long time for them to be dry.

When we did a houseswap last August the boy had a cabin bed, DS was very taken with it, but as we didn't want to be trying to change sheets at height and also to act as an incentive we said that DS could have one when he was out of nappies at night.

After a number of months of asking DS about it " No mummy not ready for a cabin bed yet" About a week ago after a visit to his friend who has a cabin bed DS decided that as he wanted a cabin bed he was going to go nappy free.

Great rejoicing in the rookie household, but a week later and we have only had 2 dry nights and then only because of lifting and forcing him him to do a pee at our bed time.There have been no pees on the potty all other times it has been in the bed.

DS wants to keep trying, doesn't want to go back to nappies, but I'm concerned that maybe he just isn't ready yet. Should we just keep going, must admit am fed up with being woken every night and the increased laundry ?

It's difficult isn't it? My DD 3.6 was doing really well, keeping her nappies dry at night and waking up to do a wee. So after a couple of successful weeks, she was keen to lose the nappies so we agreed. All went well for 3 days and then she started having accidents. After a week we reverted back to nappies and she's not managed to keep one dry since. She's not bothered by it and I think a major factor is that my DH has been working shifts the last 2 weeks which has resulted in her getting uo too early and staying up late, making her too tired to control her bladder at night.

When my dd (now 5) was 3 and had been in pants through day for few months I worked out that she wasn't actually weeiing in her nappy at night, she wass just waking up and having one big wee in her nappy in the morning. So we got rid of nappies and she went on potty instead - we had it right next to bed for her. Maybe thats what is happening?
If still actually weeing AT NIGHT then probably just not physically ready yet.
Pampers bed pads are great during the process too - make a sandwich of sheet, bedpad, sheet and then if bedwets you just whip sheet and pad off, and viola clean sheet and less time spent up through night

Thanks for quick responses.

We are using the bed pads and they are a saviour ( although not v good for the environment I'm sure)

He isn't weeing in the morning as the wake up calls vary between 10.30pm and 3 am. Last night he said that it was too dark for him to find potty which is why he peed in the bed. DH has bought him a new lamp thinking this might help.

So maybe we just need to go back to nappies at night or I suppose pull ups to try to encourage him to keep them dry/use the potty. Thing is DS will take it badly, he was so keen to have his cabin bed

I spoke to the health visitor about this this morning.

DS is the same age and also been dry in the daytime for about a year. After a few weeks his pull ups were also dry in the morning but I was about to have DS2 and we were moving house so I figured it was probably best not to take them away as he would probably regress.

He did and has been wet ever since. The HV said I have probably missed the window for him losing them after being consistently dry as he is just used to the safety of them now.

I shall watch with interest.

Thats interesting fruitstick, did the hv suggest persevering ?

To what extent do you have to 'force' him to wee if you lift him when you go to bed ?If it's no hassle and just a 3 minute job, you could just do that for as long as it takes. That way he progresses from night nappies and gets his bed, and you minimise the laundry. Win win. I know someone who did this with one of their kids, and though they ended up doing so for quite some time (a year or more), it worked fine for them and eventually he just got old enough and they stopped.

When I say force I mean that DS is asleep and is quite rightly a tad annoyed when he gets woken up stuck on a potty and told to do a pee.

I shall be doing it tonight as I'm on the red eye special early morning flight for work tomorrow and its bad enough getting up at 5.00am without being woken in the middle of the night as well.

I do agree with the principal of what you are saying arrietyclock thing about doing the setting down on the potty, think I read somewhere that this doesn't teach them how to do it of his own accord, but maybe we just need to keep doing that.

i have spoken to a hv today to about this. dd is 2.6 and has been dry in the day for 9 months. her night nappies have always been soaking so i was in no rush to take them away. but since xmas and a new bed she doesnt want to wee in her bed so wakes at 2.30am and 5am shouting for a wee, mostly her nappy is dry and she does 2 big wees in the toilet, but some nights she sleeps through and her nappy is slightly wet and she does a big weee in the toilet in the morning.
hv said dont lift as you teach them to wee half asleep and then they take ages to learn to wake properly and get to the toilet/potty.
she suggested we remove the nappy and put a potty by the bed (as dd is too small to get on the toilet alone) but dd wont use a potty and ive been tucking her in tight so she doesnt fall out of bed and i dont think shed manage to get out, wee and get back in at night twice so im stuck getting up twice a night.

Personally, I would say that he can have the cabin bed now if he wears a nappy at night. Tell him we don't want the nice bed to get wet etc. I would then keep him in nappies at night for at least another 6 months before trying anything again - unless you start to be taking off dry nappies in the mornings and then you could have another go. I don't think he's old enough to worry about not being night trained yet and I would personally avoid any pressure. Without meaning to be rude, it may appear that you are offering a huge reward (cabin bed) in exchange for something that is not fully under his control (night training) so it's not quite fair IMO.

Night training is aided by the body producing a hormone that makes less wee at night. This hormone might not yet have kicked in yet - it varies hugely.

I recently learned that children need to be producing a certain hormone before they will wake up when they need to we. No amount of encouragement, incentive or lifting will hasten the rate at which they produce this hormone.

I have decided to just wait until DD1 (almost 4) is consistently dry and then remove her sleep pants. The medical profession don't consider it an issue until they are 7, so I wouldn't worry until nearer that age.

my hv told me to let night dryness occur naturally as it is something that needs to "click" in their brain. She said they don't consider night wetness a problem until the child is 7. In the end with dd we had to lift her at night when we went to bed as she was too big for the pull ups. She went from being soaking wet in a pull up to being dry at night with just one wee at 10 ish. We eventually fazed this out as well. She was 4 by the time she was dry at night, we alsoused this method for ds, at a similar age.

oops x posts

Ah yes, the 'teach them to do it on their own' thing. I think they nearly didn't do it for that very reason (not least because their son could do a 'standing up wee' without, it appeared, really waking up properly!). Tricky one really. I guess it's like all these things - works for some kids, and digs a large hole for the parents to fall into with others. But if you're up at 5 tomorrow anyway (gulp!), I'd say ignore the experts, at least for tonight.

Hope you get it cracked soon.

Point taken messygarden and others. I thought the cabin bed would be a nice incentive but has not quite worked out that way. Will talk to DH about it again to see if we can decide what to do for the best.

Must go to bed now, thanks for your responses.

Just to give a wee (hee hee) update. DS had said to DH that the reason he was wetting the bed was because he was too scared to get up as it was dark. DH bought him a lamp and bingo result, DS quite happily peeing in the potty for 2 nights running, which meant I had a blissful 6 hours sleep before my early start on Wednesday.

So cabin bed bought yesterday, came home to find DH in a fearsome mood due to his inability to put it together, finally completed at 9.30pm, happy DS who managed to switch on light, get down steps and pee in his potty during the night. Fingers crossed it all continues well.