Anyone e;se's 2 yr old refusing to PT because younger sibling is in nappies?

[Rosebud05]

As the title says, really. My dd was 2.2 when ds came along and had been using her potty quite enthusiastically at home for a while. I didn't push it or try to get her out of nappies because I knew ds was on the way. Since he arrived in early June, she hasn't used her potty at home once, though has gone through phases of using the toilet/potty at nursery, so that they suggested that she wear pull ups as she kept taking her nappy off to use the loo. She's now 2.9, and adament that she wants to continue to wear nappies at home as her little brother does.
I've tried rewards, 'I want my potty' and other books, encouragement, cajoling, explaining that she'll always be our baby etc. I haven't mentioned it for a few weeks as I find it really stressful as it feels like it's close to becoming a battle of wills. Do I just trust that she'll be ready one day and try to ignore others' comments? Or is there something else that I could try? I try to be empathic that it's a big psychological leap for her, but find it reallty irritating that she's obviously capable but just wont!

Sorry, typing with baby on my lap... else's, I meant!

This can't just me me, surely......

DS2 is the youngest and at 2.6 years is refusing to come out of nappies. I'm not that bothered however becuase my experience with Ds1 and DD taught me that they will do it eventually. DD was 2.5 when Ds2 was born and she wuldn't go into pants until she was well over 3. I am sure it was her way of hanging onto being a baby when there was competition (DS2).
I am sure DS2 is physically ready for getting out of nappies, but I am not going to push it.

Thanks for your reply. Deep down, I know that she will eventually do it, and it's reassuring to hear that your dd was in nappies at 3 as I'm sick of the 'oh, she's a girl, they're easier to PT' comments. Do you mind me asking what worked eventually, or did she just make up her mind one day?

My DD is 2.8 and have tried potty training on and off with not much success. My DS is 12 months old and I think DD likes to be babied too. Its pretty stressful and after about the 5th attempt over the last two weeks, with DD demanding to wear knickers but still not weeing on the potty/toilet (despite spending half the day sitting on it!). I am going back to nappies and will try again when she turns 3.
Lots of DDs friends are potty trained, lots aren't, so have made a conscious decision to stop thinking about it. Good luck!

The thing is I really can't remember what worked with either DS1 or DD in the end. All I can remember is that it wasn't stressful because they both kind of did it themselves. I had previuosly tried twice with DS1 and it had been awful. Looking back he was simply not ready. Everyone was convinced that DD would potty train really easily as she is a girl and forward in many other areas. I just had to let their comments wash over me and keep reminding myself that it would happen when she was ready. Interestingly she has been dry at night since she went into pants in the day. Many of her peers who went into pants much younger are still weraing pull ups at night.

My friend has a DD a wwek older than DS2 and her nursery told her that she had to be out of nappies by Christmas. As far as I know she managed it, but it was very stressful and she found it very tough. I am too lazy for that kind of potty training and am happy to wait until Ds2 shows that he is ready. After all who will know in 1 or 2 yaers time who went into pants when?

I asked DS2 if wanted to wear pants a few days ago and reminded him that his little friend already wears pants and uses a toilet. He told me he didn't need to wear pants because he has nappies. Clearly peer pressure isn't going to work!

DS1 is 2.7 and DS2 is 16 months. I don't think DS1 is reluctant because DS2 is still in nappies I think he is just not ready yet. Older DDs were both dry by 2. Since xmas he is actually wearing pants in the day in the house but when I try trousers he wees in them. Before xmas he wouldn't even wear pants so it is a step forward. DS1 on the other hand sits and claps when DS1 has used the potty and is very intersted in its contents and wants to sit on it quite frequently. I am hoping this is a good sign and he will be dry earlier!

I agree that pull ups are confusing - nursery suggested them as she went through a few weeks of consistently using the toilet there and throwing her nappies away. They suggested sending her in pants but I was a bit reluctant as she wasn't using her potty/toilet at all at home (and refusing to) and it didn't want to set up a stressful situation for her at nursery ie she only goes 2 days a week and wasn't in the habit of using toilet at home.
I've tried the pretty pants option, specifically, the yellow pants she wanted and even wrote a number on aka Numberjacks as she requested. She's sometimes happy to wear them, but demands a nappy as soon as she needs to wee or poo.
She did mention that she'd like to wear knickers to nursery the other week - i might try that in a month or so if there's been no more progress.
Thanks for your replies - it helps to not feel like the only one!

When I finally ditched the diposable pull-ups, I used normal (Roary!) pants when at home and washable training pants when out and about. They look and feel like normal pants but can hold a wee accident if needs be. It's obvious to them when they have done a wee (or poo!) unlike with disposable pull-ups. I used Bright Bots Training Pants (bought from bumfluffnappies.com) and can highly recommend them!

HTH
Z xx

I've had two girls in nappies at 3ish (no special needs, just a bit later than average). It's much easier to potty train when they want to rather than to push it early like we did with dd1 (at 2.2 ish) who took months and months to be reliable.

dd2 is a one of those that'll only do something when she knows she can do it perfectly. She walked late and was so very steady when she did, she'd been capeable for ages! With potty training she was 2.11 when she finally trained. We had one wee on the floor and one wet bed and she was then reliably dry day and night!

dd3 was over 3 when she was dry, she wanted the attention newborn ds was getting and liked nappy times. Lots of dicussion about how she was a big girl and could do much better things than the baby seemed to help.

As is often the way with these types of threads..... I'd read your kind advice and decided that dd being in nappies until she was over 3 wasn't that big a deal when she announced that she wanted to do a wee on her potty, and indeed she did. And the next one. And the next. She told me a couple of days later that "I don't wear nappies anymore" and that seems to be it for the moment. One accident on the second day, now clean and dry during the day for a week including at nursery. Haven't decided what if anything to do about night yet!
If there was one thing that tipped the balance, I would say it was 'Pirate Pete's Potty Book' (got it out of the library as too stingy to buy the girls' version). I thought it was excellent and much better than the coy photo based ones that we've read before. That and her baby brother starting to eat food - I think she realised that she doesn't have to try to be like him as he's going to get more like her, if that makes sense.
Early days but I hope that this might help someone else.