Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Potty training

Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

toilet trained at home but not at nursery - ideas welcome!

2 replies

bryony77 · 07/12/2009 13:11

DD is 2.10 and goes go nursery 3.5 days a week. On the non-nursery days (and mornings/evenings) she has rarely had an accident for at least 3 months and either will go to the toilet when prompted (when she's making that squirming movement) or will often take herself off on her own, do a wee/poo in the toilet and come back telling us all about it and looking very pleased. She's not a all keen on 'trying', though - eg won't sit on toilet before we go out to see if she needs to go as is adamant about when she does/doesn't need to go.

Nursery is a different story. She holds on to her wee for ages - sometimes can be 4pm before she goes - and although they take her to sit on the potty fairly frequently (and at nursery she does go and do this), she only does a wee very occasionally and hasn't had a single dry day yet. The peak was 8 pairs of pants and trousers in one day but the norm is 2 or 3 - often doing a wee a few minutes after she's been sitting on the potty.

She's still quite shy with them, even though she's been in the same 'class' for almost a year now and so they try prompting her and have made some cut out potty pictures which she could go and get if she didn't want to actually tell them but all to no avail.

I've tried talking to her about it and although she knows it's "not very good" (her words when I collect her in the evening) when she has wet trousers, when I say that she needs to go on the potty / tell someone / take the potty picture she just says she doesn't want to but won't tell me why not.

I feel pretty powerless as for me she's fine - happy to go either at home, at friends' house, in public toilets or on travel potty - so I don't know what else I could do to try to crack this at nursery. Not only is it getting a bit wearing having so much washing all the time and knowing she's perfectly capable of not wetting herself, but she's also due to move up to the next room at nursery after Christmas but I don't think she'll be able to move unless she stops wetting herself and I don't want all her friends to move and her not to.

sorry for such a long post, but any experience of this? what worked for you?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
nowwearefive · 08/12/2009 12:50

Same problem here, my girls have never been brilliant at home but are largely independent, but hopeless at nursery. Am seeing a SALT to see if there is anything I can do to help with shyness and communication as they generally have problems relating to nursery staff and children. Would love to hear any suggestions from people who have been through this.

ches · 08/12/2009 15:30

I suggest that when you drop her off in the morning you take her to the loo there. Talk to her while doing it and let her voice her unease.

She could also be a child who likes her privacy. Is the potty in the open? Do they watch her while she's on it? Can they put her out of sight and leave her alone? Alternately, can they let her blow bubbles on the potty? Apparently breathing out relaxes the muscles and helps you release.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread