Help - 4 weeks in and still pooing pants...

[matronmama]

Hi, I'm hoping someone has been through/is going through the same thing. My DS in 2 years and 8 months and we had thought he was ready for potty training...
DH and myself have read loads of books and spoken to lots of people - including his nursery - and were ready for lots of mess - initially. But the fact that my DS shows no sign of discomfort when he's wet or dirtied himself really makes me wonder whether we should go back to wearing nappies (which I'd rather not do) or keep trying to remain calm and caring every time he does it, when all I really want to do is shout at him and tell him off - which I know you should not do...

ds2 is 23months and we had 3 weeks of pooing in pants - just had 4 clean days. He was showing all the signs before I started, can even pull pants and trousers up and down himself which is more than his big brother could when we started.

The key for us came from the 'toddler taming' book (I was looking for any ideas) there is a bit in there about the 'sit and wait' method for potty training and I realised ds wasn't sitting long enough to have a poo on the potty. It goes

1. get toddler to sit happily and regularly on the potty or toilet (aim for 3 sits a day pref after meals, read story, loads of praise ) 2)Gradually increase length of time that child sits (special book or activity - ds loves stickers - for potty time)
2. Once sitting established start talking poo (drop hints, when it happens go overboard on fuss - we called daddy at work to tell him if getting no where wait a few weeks and try again

Also made him undress himself when had accidence - sounds really mean but it didn't feel like that! I guess I wanted it to be more involved and give him idea that it would be easier for him to use potty and then get back to toys rather than faffing with changing - I guess this wouldn't have worked if he wasn't 'ready'

With wees I do remind him if he hasn't been for an hour or so and take him before leaving house, arriving somewhere and before meals.

Have held off bribary with chocolate rewards (mainly because i have a 3yr old who would expect the same ) but it was a possibility.

HTH and good luck with it all.