DD is 16 months, when should i be thinking about potty training?

[GhoulsAreLoud]

Haven't given it a moments thought, tbh.

But should I be getting her a potty at least to get her used to it?

Thanks.

When she can tell you with words that she needs a wee or a poo

When she can independently pull trousers and knickers down and up independently

NOt for a VERY long time yet (IMVHO)

I had a potty around from when dd was about a year. She is now 22 months and will go on the potty and ask to use it before her bath but she is still in nappies full time, I have no wish to move things on yet. I do think just having a potty helps though, rather than just springing it on them when the time comes.

Phew thanks.

I will forget about it but maybe get a potty for bringing out at bath time.

Cheers both.

I've read quite a bit on here saying wait til they're ready etc and that ideal age is between 2 and 3, and I fully agree with the theory.

I have bought a potty though (dd 15mo), it sits in the bathroom corner and if she happens to do a wee while waiting to get in bath (which is quite often) I've been popping her on it and getting excited about the wee. Am I being pushy? I'm in no rush to get her out of nappies at all, in fact dreading the days when we have to always know where the nearest toilet is! Just thought it couldn't hurt to get the idea started in her head.

I'm certainly not going to be putting her on there just in case etc.

I'm dreading it as well. Nappies are so easy

If you leave it until they are REALLY ready - i.e, them being able to tell you they need a wee or a poo - you generally skip the whole chapter on asking them every 5mins if they need the toilet, fretting over where the nearest toilet is, taking 3 changes of underwear everywhere with you, bribing with chocolate buttons etc etc

Can you tell I've trained 1 child and left the other to tell me herself when she wanted to be trained?

I'll let you guess which was easier

2yo at least

I'd say 2.6-3

When she says "Mummy, I don't want to wear nappies any more" Then you can say"OK, darlling. Here are some pants and there is the loo - call me when you need some help" Job done, easy peasy no accidents. About 3 - 3.5. IMHO.

I got mine out of nappies at nearly 3 - it
was really easy, all done within a fortnight

Dry at night a few months later - all dry within a month

I definitely think later is best, although if you are using washables earlier is often possible - not so with my too though!

Seeker, that was dd2 - "I don't want nappies, I want knickers today"

Was a bit as she was only 2.5

But thought, ok, we'll see. 1hr later wet pants. Thought, right, next wet pair and you're in a nappy, my love...

I can count the number of wee accidents on the fingers of 1 hand and she's 3.3 now. Had 1 poo-in-pants incident on day2

Agree with notnowbernard, the later the better IME.

DD1 was 2 when we started potty training and what a nightmare, our lives revolved around toilets/potties and weeing.

DD2 was 2.7yo and she asked to use the toilet like DD1 does, no potty used, she got it in 4 days.

DD3 I am leaving until she can pull down her nappy and train herself

My friend started her DD when she was 12 months old. She was done at 18 months. I started my DS at 14 months old and was done at 18 months (got poos by 15 months). Friends started their DD at 15 months. At 17 months she's doing most poos in toilet. She is doing signs, and signing a great deal, but not using many words. When DS started he had hardly any words. "Wee" was one of his first words.

The problem with starting during Terrible Twos is that it's a very negative age when they try to enforce their independence. They also are also thoroughly used to weeing/pooing in a nappy by that age and SOME (look on the board!) have a very hard time making the transition. It's a bit like suddenly being told you have to write with the opposite hand, and someone expecting perfect cursive the first day/week. SOME people will get it, most will not.

When you start early, it's a gentle transition, a bit like weaning. (Nobody says "Oh, don't start weaning at 6 months, wait until they're 18 months and can manage a fork!") When you star early, you leave them in nappies and introduce potty breaks at times that will instill good habits: before/after sleep, before/after leaving the house, before/after meals. Like weaning, you start with once a day and build on it. You intoduce a word or sign for toilet, throw poo from nappies down the toilet and flush together to make the association, talk about how everyone uses the toilet. It makes the toilet the natural place for wee/poo, not the nappy.

We have just finished the transition from nappies to big boy pants for our DS, he is almost 2. It wasn't really intentional, I wanted to wait until after the next one is born at the end of January, as I agree nappies can be much easier, however he decided that he wanted out of nappies.

DS started showing signs at about 18 months. He always told me before he was weeing and pooing and started taking his nappy off. We were traveling around a lot over the summer so I didn't want him to start until we were more settled.

I am fortunate in that I am a SAHM and I live in a warm climate so we were able to very gently go with what DS wanted with out it being a hassle. So a few weeks ago we bought some potties and also some big boy pants and started the transition. He did struggle initially with the poo's as I think he was scared at what he saw, but as ches said we just acknowledged and tried to normalise going to the loo for everyone.

I expect there might be some regression when the next baby comes along but for the moment it's working. He even sends us away when he goes for poo's and calls us when he is done. A few of my friends have been able to potty train their DC's before they were two as well, but mostly it depends on the child and also if the parent is not working and the child isn't going to nursery.

We also bought a potty book as well which turns out is one of my DS's favourites!

I hear what you are saying ches about a gentle transition, but seriously, do you want to spend 4-6 months potty training?

It would appear that the joy of leaving it till later is that potty training is generally a choice made by the child, and as such can be over and done with in a few days.

I know what I'll be doing

I think it's a personal choice really. From what I've read it's definitely easier / quicker to train an older child - but that is counteracted by the fact that you have an extra yucky year in nappies. Personally I hate nappies, particularly once they are toddlers, the poos are just so revolting to change! Also I find it a bit gross having 2 or 3 yr old in nappies, but I guess that's just me as so many people don't seem to agree.

DD1 trained v quickly at 2.3 (i.e. she was older and v easy). With DD2 I introduced the potty a bit earlier - had it around from 18 months, put DD2 in pull ups and started regular potty trips from about 20 months and she was fully trained at 22 months - which saved me 5 months of nappies as compared to DD1 which was great. She wasn't capable of getting on the loo or sorting out all her clothes at that age so I still had to help her with that, but she was quite capable of running over to me and asking to go to the loo. I probably put in a bit more effort with DD2, but it wasn't a big deal as the first few months of 'training' she was still mainly wearing pull ups. When we went cold turkey into pants the period of accidents was maybe a week longer than DD1 - but that could have just been her rather than age as DD1 really did train super quickly in about 3 days. DD2 did have a slight regression 5 months later after DS was born, but that was soon sorted out so not a big deal.

I agree with ches. The gentle transition doesn't have to be difficult or unpleasant as you still use nappies, so it's not as if you spend those few months surrounded by wet / soiled clothes. You just add the small extra activity of sitting on the potty into the daily routine.

no harm getting a potty as soon as you like to get them used to the idea

dd1 wasn't seriously potty-trained til she was 2.5 or so (tried and failed 3 months earlier), but it was fast without too many accidents

We also introduced a potty at appropriate times - first thing in morning and before bath - just to get the idea going, and also reduce need for changes. When we actually 'went' for potty training at 2.2, managed it over the weekend....

VFemme it was exactly as Nelly said, just one extra activity a few times a day. I potty trained for four months and it was awesome. It was another year before he took responsibility for it himself, so I was still helping him to the loo, but no nappies. Poo in the toilet from 15 months was a godsend. (He was a terrible wiggler during nappy changes, from very early on. It was a two-person job.)

I firmly believe that each family should do what's right for them. If nappies until 3 is right for your family, go ahead. However, there is another way and it's not often spoken about on mumsnet.

ches, I don't know why, but I just had in my mind that potty training is such a messy affair (clueless first time mum), but looking at the posts above I realise that it doesn't have to be.

Actually in the last week, ds has decided (with no prompting from me) that he wants to start using his potty, so I'm going to go with it and see how it goes.

I'm quite intrigued as to the "other way"...

I would introduce a potty and put her on it at regular times such as when she gets dressed in the morning and evening, at bathtime, at nappy changes in between, after meal or snack times and when I go to the toilet. I also got DS some special books on potties and toilets for him to read when he sits on there and he has a boy doll that wees. It's not potty training as such just a gradual introduction to the idea.

There are many methods of potty training a child. Provided you carry out a particular method with love and there is no coersion then it really doesn't matter which method you choose to train a child.

Incidently I have been putting my daughter on the potty since the age of six months! Ofcourse she is still completely incontinent at 8 months, but it is an alternative way of dealing with the waste. A lot of the developing world start toilet training at a very early age.

It is true that I am more trained than she is, but we are getting good at catching the poos. Elimination communication is a great way of getting rid of nappy rash. I have to admit that we are not brave enough to ditch the nappies.

Hmm, I suppose it is that line between just early learnt behaviour and understanding. My DS 2.3 understands completely, will happily sit on loo, or even stand at loo and just seems to know what to do - obviously from watching DH but he still won't actually "do" it!! He has a "try" then says "no" as in nope nothing there! he does not tell me when he is having a wee or a pooh either, plus his speech is very very poor. I'm not stressed about it at all, would rather he just did it later on (I have potty trained before btw!!) for what it's worth, I have had a potty hanging around since he was about 11 months and he has weed in it occasionally, but he isn't impressed and understands completely what both potty and toilet are for!

I agree with NotNowBernard, when she can say 'I need a wee' then you can do it. DD was done at 18 months but it helped that it was summer so we were outside with no pants on a lot and we don't have carpets downstairs so puddles were quickly mopped. It took nearly 3 weeks.

If you are working and have a house full of carpets you might want to wait so it can all be done quicker.

I can't tell you how much nicer it is not to have to clean up after a smelly dirty nappy every day

We started ds when he was about 2.2 as hv said it could be done, but after mths of constant accidents and new baby gave up and started again when he was nearly 3. Had more success and that time went 'cold turkey' ie no nappies for out and about, just took changes of clothes. At 3.5 he still has accidents but he can and does say if he needs to go. I know people whose dc's took to it no prob but my ds has definitely been challenging, some just are. After all this hassle i have decided to leave dd (16 mths) until she is 3 unless she shows sure signs of wanting to do it as really can't be bothered with the stress this time round. She might surprise me and be easy! (I live in hope lol).