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Potty training

Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

Original poster

Potty training 3 year old girl. How to send into nursery tomorrow?

56 replies

indecided · 05/07/2026 08:36

Started training 36 month old DD yesterday, she’s actually done very well and only had 3 wee accidents and one poo accident yesterday.
I was so worried she’d be difficult to train like my DS was a few years back but she’s surprised us so far!
Anyway, she started a new nursery last week (having been at another one since she was 1), and she’s settled in well, so I felt like it was a good time to get her potty trained but wondering what the nursery will think and how we send her in. Shall I just send in with pants on and say there you go! Or send in a nappy and explain that we want to potty train.
Am I over thinking this?

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gradistar · 05/07/2026 18:53

Why have you left it so late? 2-2.5 is the best time to start. And you are expecting them to potty train her after one single day! That is taking the piss tbh you need to take a week to do it yourself really…

Honeyhonayboo · 05/07/2026 18:55

Allonthesametrain · 05/07/2026 18:53

They're really helpful at the invetween stage as the design is pants, not a usual nappy.

Show quote history

A pull up is exactly like a nappy to the wearer, literally the only difference is the way the parent puts it on. They are made to absorb just as much as a nappy.

MMUmum · 05/07/2026 19:00

indecided · 05/07/2026 08:36

Started training 36 month old DD yesterday, she’s actually done very well and only had 3 wee accidents and one poo accident yesterday.
I was so worried she’d be difficult to train like my DS was a few years back but she’s surprised us so far!
Anyway, she started a new nursery last week (having been at another one since she was 1), and she’s settled in well, so I felt like it was a good time to get her potty trained but wondering what the nursery will think and how we send her in. Shall I just send in with pants on and say there you go! Or send in a nappy and explain that we want to potty train.
Am I over thinking this?

I sent Dd in cotton pants, I put pull ups in her bag and asked staff just to put pull ups on if she had an.accident, worked for us and nursery staff

godblessmeitssummah · 05/07/2026 19:03

You’re expecting to send her in with ONE day training under her belt? Ridiculous

stichguru · 05/07/2026 19:04

Send her in pants
Put a number of spare changes of clothes in
Put a number of nappies in and tell nursery to put her back in nappies if she is having a number of accidents that is awkward for her and them.

She may well do brilliantly at nursery like she has at home and you don't want to prevent this. Also though it will be embarrassing and uncomfortable for her and time consuming for them if she wets and poos her pants all day!

MeetMeOnTheCorner · 05/07/2026 19:12

@ednakenneth I tried with DD1 for quite a while after she was 2.5. Not remotely interested. She could do lots of other things and her vocabulary was amazing. So development can be compartmentalised. I didn’t start again, having stopped on advice, until she was 3. Just 3 weeks before nursery started. In a week it was done. Dry at night almost immediately. Girls don’t always care about being wet in a nappy. Mine happily ignored it.

I think the mistake is 1 day before nursery. We had nearly 1 month. At 3 that’s a decent lead in and dd never had a wee accident anywhere. She just clicked but one day and then not saying anything to nursery is not a great plan!

godblessmeitssummah · 05/07/2026 19:14

I just feel like you’re setting her up to fail, and taking the absolute piss with nursery.

Take time off work and train properly.

Straightomyhead · 05/07/2026 19:20

ednakenneth · 05/07/2026 18:24

That's very late in age to be potty training. Didn't she show any signs of wanting to go to the toilet , feeling being dirty or wet before now?
On average girls are easier and do come out of nappies alot earlier than boys.
Have you not attempted to do this before?
My daughter was dry at 2years old. I could have done it earlier but couldn't be bothered. She hated feeling wet and dirty.
You will have a difficult job now you've left it so late

And how is this comment useful how?

My little boy has just turned 2.5 and actively doesn’t want the potty. We’ve tried and now leaving it a few weeks. But if it was me and someone was just saying I had done it wrong in the past, it wouldn’t be that helpful or make me feel better about the process.

I can’t give the OP much advice but as I’m still at the beginning of this but speak to nursery to see what they want or suggest.

SweetBaklava · 05/07/2026 19:21

Allonthesametrain · 05/07/2026 18:08

Pull up nappy until she's fully trained.

This is terrible advice!

OP, ignore the judgy posts about your DD’s age. Yes I would have waited until she was settled in the new nursery, but now that you’ve started I would crack on. As with previous good advice, send her in with spare clothes etc and the staff will be happy to support - this is bread and butter to toddler room staff, they are very experienced at this and won’t bat an eyelid!

mrssnow7 · 05/07/2026 19:27

Send her in pants and pack a few spare pairs along with spare socks and shorts/whatever bottoms she’s wearing.

Looneytune253 · 05/07/2026 19:28

As a childcare provider I would find all this incredibly unfair. It’s definitely worth chatting to the carer ahead of time so you can make a plan together. No provider wouldn’t want to help the child and go
forward With their development BUT the least you could do is discuss it with them in advance so you can make a plan together. It’s very unfair to just show up in knickers. Personally I would suggest you keep her off a few days and really get to grips with it before sending her in. It’s not fair to spring it on them. I wouldn’t suggest stopping now that you’ve started but please put in the groundwork before you send her into the busier environment. If that’s a few days off that would be what’s best for the child. It’s also not recommended to have big changes together. I’m concerned the little one has had a change of nursery and then potty training in a short period of time.

nutbrownhare15 · 05/07/2026 19:31

I'm not sure why you would start potty training when she has to go to nursery tomorrow and it's a nursery she's only just started at. Too many transitions.

2chocolateoranges · 05/07/2026 19:34

I work in early years, my advice is to send her in with pants, with plenty changes of clothes and spare shoes, just in case. Speak to her hey worker on arrival and explain how she has got on this weekend and they will help remind and assist your little one.

i would also not expect too much for her tomorrow as nursery is way different from being at home. She will be distracted and may have more accidents due to being busy and using nursery toilets for the first time,

Allonthesametrain · 05/07/2026 19:34

Honeyhonayboo · 05/07/2026 18:55

A pull up is exactly like a nappy to the wearer, literally the only difference is the way the parent puts it on. They are made to absorb just as much as a nappy.

Show quote history

Yeah I get that but for us it worked with DS because he saw them as normal pants. Anything is worth a try until we get it right I guess. Xx

Bitzee · 05/07/2026 19:46

How many accidents did she have today?
3 wee accidents and 1 poo accident is a lot. It must be most if not of all of her toileting that day. I get it’s day 1 so to be expected but unless today was a massive turn around you can’t send her to nursery tomorrow in underwear, especially not a new nursery where she’s still settling in. If it were me I’d try to have 1 of you stay home with her tomorrow and maybe Tuesday as well to cement it and chat to nursery on the phone about how they can support when she returns properly trained. If you can’t do that due to work commitments and today was still loads of accidents then honestly send her in a pull up and revisit when you have the time to do it properly.

CoffeeAndWalnut26 · 05/07/2026 19:47

send in wearing pants. If you can be first / sharp at opening to arrive and ask to have a quick word with staff to give a heads up then that would be appreciated just so they know where everyone is at. Be prepared for lots of washing but do understand that nursery staff are (or should be) very up for helping with milestones like this. No one in their right minds wants to hold a child back and give mixed messages. You might come to an agreement that if after 5 accidents & changes staff could use a pull up and draw a line under it as some days can be hectic and tricky e.g. first aid occurance with another child / fire drill / special event / supply staffing and this may not be a good fit but pants & regular toilet remibders & a helping hand if needed are not impossible for a nursery environment. - Ex nursery worker x

TwinklySquid · 05/07/2026 19:57

As she only started last week at a new nursery , I’d do pull up nappies- to get her in the habit of being able to take them down herself.
Do a bit more work at home with her and when you are home-ie a weekend- do just knickers.
From there, add in clothes to the mix.

It’s the knowing they need the loo and being able to get undressed quickly where they go wrong.

CaniculeMalaise · 05/07/2026 20:01

Why on earth did you leave it until she is 36 months and then expect to fix it all in a day? Not fair at all to the nursery.

MDDR · 05/07/2026 21:22

Really you need to have taken some time off work/nursery to work on this with her. I don't think it's fair to send her in, to a new setting, having had a number of accidents on day one.

We did the three day method with my just turned 2 year old but also had a week off work/nursery to make sure he was accident free and confident.

GoFigure235 · 05/07/2026 21:48

The worst thing you can do is make children stressed over potty training. It would certainly have stressed out one of my DC to have had accidents in a strange place with people they didn't fully trust yet looking after them. My older DC was more blase and so wouldn't have cared so much about the odd accident.

You know your child, OP. Some children get very upset about accidents. With my younger one, we very much took an 'accidents happen' approach with absolutely no fuss because that was what she needed and she didn't go to nursery in pants until she was confident using the toilet on her own. There is no way I would send an anxious child who needs reassurance to nursery in pants on the second day of potty training.

StolenTeapots · 05/07/2026 23:58

Agree with others. This is not a good idea to send her in when she's only been there a week. Let her settle in there first.

I don't know what you do now tbh. Try speak to nursery v early

Substance · 06/07/2026 03:47

Wind-up alert. No one on God's green earth spends ONE day toilet training a 3 year old, announces the child has done 'very well' after having FOUR accidents that day, and then seriously suggests sending the child to a new nursery in pants on day two. Not buying it.

SweepSqueaks · 06/07/2026 06:25

I wonder if the new nursery were surprised that a three year old was in nappies and it’s jolted the OP in to action. I think nursery will be on board and want her to be potty trained. The timing isn’t great but it’s happened now. Taking some time off this week would be helpful.

oustedbymymate · 06/07/2026 06:47

I mean it’s too late now but think only one day at home and then off to a new nursery is a lot to ask of your child. But if you’re wanting nursery to do the heaving lifting then send her in pants with lots of spares and spare shoes and hope for the best.

I would have at least maybe tried for a weekend rather than a day but there we are.

Dovecare · 10/07/2026 13:47

Why did you wait until now? 2 years is the optimimum age and many this age are extremely quick to pick it up. Just asking as this seems unusual to me.