Losing the will to live with potty training

[Tisfortired]

My middle son was 3 last week. We tried to potty train him over the summer but after a week he just wasn’t getting it at all and we needed to go back to work, so we went back to nappies and waited until we thought he was a bit more ready.

Now, he has reached three and I’m feeling the pressure to have him trained and believe he should be able to do it now. On Monday this week we went cold turkey with the pull ups. He’s been naked from the waist down since Monday. The week has gone like this;

Monday - one wee in the potty. We were all elated gave so much praise etc. lots and lots of accidents, he seemed to be weeing every 20/30 mins.

Tuesday - two wees in the potty, again so many accidents.

Wednesday - yesterday I started to set a timer on my phone and sat him on the potty every 30 mins for 5
mins at a time and managed to do 4 wees in the potty.

Today - following same as yesterday, have so far got one wee in the potty (pull up was dry this morning so sat him on there and he did a big wee after a couple of minutes.) Every other wee has been on the floor.

The problem is he seems to have no awareness of the need to go whatsoever. He doesn’t tell me he needs a wee, he doesn’t tell me when he’s wet. I’m having to constantly check him in between sitting him on the potty. Any potty success is as a result of me having him sat on the potty for periods of time.

I am writing this now as he has just put his play tunnel over himself so he is stood in it and done a wee in there on the kitchen floor, immediately after me having him sit on the potty for 5 minutes.

He was at a private nursery before Christmas but started pre school in a school this week which requires him to be trained. I have kept him off since Tuesday because he was having so many accidents at home it wasn’t fair on them or him to be constantly changing him.

I am getting so stressed with this now though obviously not letting him see that, I am being very casual about accidents and reminding him wee goes in the potty not the floor. He doesn’t seem bothered. His communication is generally good and no SEN that I am aware of. My older son was trained at 2.5 really easily so I’m feeling a bit lost here.

Chocolate.

Mine only ‘got it’ once they got a chocolate button every time they used the potty.

Needs must.

I let my DS choose some new underwear and told him to try really hard to keep them dry. When we needed to go somewhere or at night I put a pull up on over his underwear so that he’d still feel if he was wet. He seemed to click on with daytime dryness quickly at 2 1/2 but he wasn’t dry at night until he was just turned 5. Bribery and reward charts did help with a promise of a trip to Toys R Us to choose some Lego if he got so many stars in a row on the calendar.

Naked from the waist down isn’t helping him connect the action of doing a wee with the discomfort of being wet. He needs to be in underwear.

My son potty trained quickly at 3.5 years. After several failed attempts I decided to just sit back and wait for him to show interest. When he started wanting to wee in the potty I added additional motivation by offering him a chocolate smarty every time he used it. He then decided soon after he wanted to go to nursery without his nappy on and rarely had an accident after. It all happened very quickly and easily but he needed to be ready. I would say keep trying on and off over the next 6 months and it should just click for him.

He’s not ready. You have to go at their pace not the nursery. My son was dry in the day at about 3.5 but only dry at night when he was 7.

Put pants on and ditch the potty. He is a big boy and so needs the big boy toilet now.
My son refused to go near a potty and used the toilet with step and seat.
He can even help choose the seat as they come in some funky designs