Do you have to go all in on potty training or can you start early/gently?

[Sonshinedays]

My DS is 16months and I know it’s a bit early to be potty training as biologically he’s not yet ready. However, I can almost always tell when he needs to poo and he quite frequently will get constipated. We are addressing the constipation through diet as well but thought it might help to be sat on a potty in a squatting position. So essentially would be doing elimination communication where I am picking up on his cues and putting him on the potty. My only hesitation is that I have no idea when he needs to wee and so I would potentially only be doing it for poos. I’m also not sure if his nursery will support starting early (or even if they do whether they’ll be as good at picking up on his cues). He’s at nursery 4days a week.

So I’m basically wondering whether putting him on the potty only sometimes will be more confusing for him and I should just wait until he’s properly ready? Or will this be helpful to get him used to a potty? Anyone have any experience of doing similar and it working?

You couldn't ask the nursery to look out for cues and then place a 16month on a potty, they are far too busy and this is unreasonable.

I dont believe you can start gently as it needs to be full on for them to understand - I need the loo now so will go. If it was sometimes using the potty and sometimes a nappy I think this would be confusing. Consistency is key to getting it.

It's best to start when they can communicate that they need to go. If you want to do it by putting them on a potty when you've observed cues then you'd have to be at home with them full time as this is too big an ask of a nursery in my opinion.

You definitely can! Our DD (10m) has been constipated since being a newborn and ERIC recommended to sit her on the potty when she aas 7m (she was a good and confident sitter) which I thought was a bit of a laugh initially to be honest. She now almost always poops when we sit her on due to the position and gravity. She does occasionally do a wee on there but obviously that’s not our main focus at this early stage. I figure when we get to potty training at least it will be a normal part of her life already and won’t be something she is scared of/doesn’t want to use. I’m pretty sure ERIC website says about a gentle introduction too.

I know things have changed a great deal since my children were little (but children haven’t). If your child is “regular”, then you can sit them on the potty from quite young - my DD almost never had a dirty nappy once she could sit on the potty, and she was out of nappies during the day before she was two. (I know girls are easier.)

Take a look at the Potty Pros Academy, they help parents potty train toddlers under 2.

Despite some evangelists swearing by particular methods, there are as many ways that work as there are different personalities.

The key thing is to be consistent - keep whatever method you use straightforward and keep at it.

You can absolutely - we did EC with my daughter from 4 months and we must have changed less than 10 poo diapers since she weaned - she's 2.5 now.
What you're suggesting is a variant of EC. Remember that pre disposable diapers, babies were potty trained as soon as they could walk and that 'readiness' in relation to potty training is no longer necessarily recomended.

Not only can, but I wish I did. Also, our nursery would have been absolutely fine with using the potty in the baby room - we discussed with them at 17 months (when he was really interested in the toilet and seemed generally capable), but decided to go for an all in one go approach (using the oh crap book) therefore delayed any attempts until we had time set aside to do it properly.

I don't dislike the oh crap book and broadly the advice was good, but we are struggling with poos three months on and I really wish I had stuck him on the potty every time I saw a poo coming at whatever age I could.

The reason I wish this is because when we started potty training (at 22 months), he got really scared of poos coming out and held them in a lot. This meant we didn't actually have much practice in our 5 days at home for training, and then he went back to nursery where they don't have capacity to help as intensely and insist on underwear being worn, so he started just pooing in his pants and continues to do so now.

The other thing is I used to be able to see a poo was coming and now they seem to slide out on the go and I only see when he's already mid poo! So I wish I'd started at the point I knew when they were coming!

So I say go for it, it can only help if they know what they are meant to do.

Yes you definitely can. We started at 6 months and by 12 months she could communicate a need to poo and then wait for the potty. Thanks to full time nursery we didn't remove nappies until around 2 but when we did it was very easy. Humans survived without nappies for millennia and I don't believe they were going around until age 2 with no bladder and bowel control.