Help and advice needed with toilet training

[IJ13]

I started toilet training my 2 year old and I was taking him every 45mins, he had a sticker chart and was very happy. The week after I went back to work and the grandmas had him. He has been in pants and had afew accidents because he still doesn’t say that he needs to go. 2 months later, he’s getting quite frustrated when he’s taken to the toilet however, he is in a pull up now and we take him every 2/3hours. He does his poos in the toilet and some wees but has to be told to go. He is dry in the night and he knows when he needs to go but just doesn’t say. I don’t know what to do to help him. Any advice? Shall I leave him in pants for afew days?

You need to ditch the pull ups, which are just nappies with clever marketing, because they are sending the signal that it’s optional and that you think he can’t do it. If he can hold it for 2-3 hours, poos are always in the toilet and he’s dry at night then he’s beyond ready and should be in pants. And I’d stop taking him completely unless in specific situations e.g. before a long car ride. He has to learn the feeling of a full bladder and when to act on it for himself which is the step you’ve missed so far. Also you have to accept that there might be a few accidents whilst he’s learning exactly how long he can hold it so initially I would have the potty very close by so he can get there quickly and always pack a change when leaving the house. I’d also go back to the sticker chart if that worked well initially to incentivise him.

Thank you so much! Really appreciate your advice. I think I need to ditch the pull ups because how many accidents can he have! He will realise he needs to just do it in the toilet. Yes his poos are in the toilet because he starts to hide and then I prompt him and say come on, I can see you need a poo let’s go to the toilet and then he comes and just does it.