Withholding poop - is this normal?

LucyKirk92 · 2025-04-06T21:07:37+00:00

My LO (2.5) is withholding her poo. It’s starting to cause her some distress & she will not poop in her nappy or potty. We had to give her prune juice the other day and she managed to poop in her nappy and we celebrated it with her. However it’s the same again today - she will shout I need nappy changed because I poop but she hasn’t and running around upset that she needs to. We have nappy free time at home. She is great at peeing on the potty and wearing pants. Have been doing this for a few weeks & going well, hardly any accidents! We wear nappies when out and about as not quite ‘there’ yet. She has the understanding of potty training. We have books explaining pee and poop. She shows she understands that you need to pee and poo in the potty. Even remarking that one of the story characters had an accident and needs to poop in the potty next time. Should I stop the potty training? Or is this a common issue? Should I continue on? Sorry I’m so stressed that I’m not doing the right thing. I don’t know what to do.

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EternallyUnsurprised · 06/04/2025 23:28

Surprisingly common. Often after a painful poo. Have you looked at the Eric website?

We used lactulose but I think most recommend movicol. You need to make the poo really soft, so no discomfort at all and makes it very difficult to hold in when they sit for a wee. Also need plenty of water!

In the end rewards worked for us. We got a set of characters from a series our son had just got into. Every (accidental at first) poo earned a new toy. Once he cottoned on to this he had 6 toilet poos in one day! Just have to remind them "that didn't hurt did it ?"

EternallyUnsurprised · 06/04/2025 23:30

...I should add, we stopped at 6 toys, after that it was stickers, but that one day broke the back of it.

Tbrh · 07/04/2025 02:06

Very normal, do a search there are other threads on here about this. Try getting her to blow bubbles, do it in the nappy and then put in the toilet to start with or offer some good incentives for when she goes

Hopeful16 · 07/04/2025 12:36

I’ve posted this on other threads but there’s an app called Poo goes to Pooland. It’s a little story which helped ours. Worth a try.

Original poster

LucyKirk92 · 07/04/2025 21:00

EternallyUnsurprised · 06/04/2025 23:28

Surprisingly common. Often after a painful poo. Have you looked at the Eric website?

We used lactulose but I think most recommend movicol. You need to make the poo really soft, so no discomfort at all and makes it very difficult to hold in when they sit for a wee. Also need plenty of water!

In the end rewards worked for us. We got a set of characters from a series our son had just got into. Every (accidental at first) poo earned a new toy. Once he cottoned on to this he had 6 toilet poos in one day! Just have to remind them "that didn't hurt did it ?"

Did you just keep carrying on then instead of having a break? She is managing to poop at nursery, so maybe something about pressure of being at home as she is in nappies all day at nursery.
Shes since had another poop (in nappy) and we clapped/ cheered and danced 😂
she’s still not overly comfortable but hoping she will get there.

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Original poster

LucyKirk92 · 07/04/2025 21:01

Hopeful16 · 07/04/2025 12:36

I’ve posted this on other threads but there’s an app called Poo goes to Pooland. It’s a little story which helped ours. Worth a try.

Thank you! I will absolutely try this 😊

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EternallyUnsurprised · 07/04/2025 21:27

LucyKirk92 · 07/04/2025 21:00

Did you just keep carrying on then instead of having a break? She is managing to poop at nursery, so maybe something about pressure of being at home as she is in nappies all day at nursery.
Shes since had another poop (in nappy) and we clapped/ cheered and danced 😂
she’s still not overly comfortable but hoping she will get there.

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A break wasn't really possible for us, he wouldn't poo anywhere. He had been successfully pooing on the toilet/ potty for a few weeks so when this started he just didn't see the nappy as an option anymore. He'd hold it in all day until it slipped out in his sleep, even then he'd wake up and try holding it in.

As awful as it was, fortunately it only lasted 2 weeks for us before we cracked it.

TY78910 · 07/04/2025 22:00

We battled with this for 18 months. Good luck OP!

Tbrh · 08/04/2025 00:49

Try not to make a big deal about it I feel the more pressure and stress the worse it becomes. My DC was 2.5 too and I used to wrap a present for him while he was going as an incentive! It took him about 2 weeks to do it and be relaxed and once that happened it was fine. Also make sure that their diet has lots of fruit and veges so the process is easier. Good luck. Poo land is good, and Lil Poo and Potty Monkey 🙂

Original poster

LucyKirk92 · 08/04/2025 08:02

TY78910 · 07/04/2025 22:00

We battled with this for 18 months. Good luck OP!

Oh no, can’t imagine dealing with the upset for so long. Was there anything that made it click or was it just a case of waiting for your little one to get it? Did you carry on as normal or change anything?

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TY78910 · 08/04/2025 08:48

LucyKirk92 · 08/04/2025 08:02

Oh no, can’t imagine dealing with the upset for so long. Was there anything that made it click or was it just a case of waiting for your little one to get it? Did you carry on as normal or change anything?

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To be honest we tried a lot - movicol treatments, reward charts, books, songs, sitting down after food, toy rewards (was doing find until got the toy, then regressed back when the achievement was unlocked) - none of the positive things worked so out of sheer desperation we even resorted to ‘no treats if poop in pants’. I spoke to a specialist (privately not NHS as GP outright said it’s not something they deal with) and they spoke about keeping a poo diary and making it a positive place but this also didn’t really work. It sort of just clicked one day which I’m totally happy with but one bout of constipation and it costs us weeks in holding in. It’s the psychological block of ‘it’s going to hurt’. Touch wood we’ve had no set backs for over a month now so I’m praying that’s it. Only thing I’ve changed is adding Kefir to her diet (you can get children’s flavoured ones)

Edenmum2 · 08/04/2025 08:53

It’s awful, you need movicol, it’s been a life changer for us. Mine would hold for a whole week and scream and cry every time she felt the urge (often)

lactulose/senna didn’t work because they don’t soften it, just force it out and it causes more distress. Movicol has made it soft and often and she’s not upset to go anymore. I would intervene early, you don’t want it to start getting impacted. I wish we’d used movicol straight away.

BeyondMyWits · 08/04/2025 08:59

Would speak to the doctor, movicol for little ones is prescription only. If they withhold too long it can stretch the bowel, meaning poops can be huge and very scary (for parents as well as them).

as others have said, when it is softened enough, it comes out at night... you can work out roughly when, over a few nights and gently wake them and carry to the loo... then move timing on food/movicol so that they go at wake up time - took us a month.

Original poster

LucyKirk92 · 08/04/2025 18:08

Edenmum2 · 08/04/2025 08:53

It’s awful, you need movicol, it’s been a life changer for us. Mine would hold for a whole week and scream and cry every time she felt the urge (often)

lactulose/senna didn’t work because they don’t soften it, just force it out and it causes more distress. Movicol has made it soft and often and she’s not upset to go anymore. I would intervene early, you don’t want it to start getting impacted. I wish we’d used movicol straight away.

Thank you. I’ll call the GP this week and request this. She goes to nursery 2 days per week and is pooping there in her pull up's so maybe feels more distracted or less pressure. Yesterday and today she is now refusing to use the potty at all so think I’ll leave off the pressure this week and maybe try again this weekend. Maybe become too much for her.

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Mayhavingbabyinmay · 22/12/2025 21:03

Hi OP wondering if anything worked for you? We are currently in the midst of this :((

Original poster

LucyKirk92 · 23/12/2025 10:00

Hello! We used the laxido prescribed by the GP a then rewarded her with a chocolate button for a pee and 2 chocolate buttons for a poop and she started to think of it as a fun game. We also read fun books when she was doing a poop as this helped distract her. Other times we would do nursery rhymes. We started with the laxido 4 x daily, then 2 x daily and then 1 x daily overtime. This went on until August until she was showing no signs of withholding, happy doing poops etc. so we stopped the laxido in August. It lasted about 5/6 months and now she is great, no issues. She does need chocolate buttons or anything to go, she just goes on her own and will pick herself a book to read.

it was a hard 5/6 months but I forget the stress even happened now because it did get better. It will get better for you and your little one too. Try the chocolate buttons, books, singing. We even sometimes used the iPad as a distraction too. Ultimately the chocolate buttons were the game changer. We would sit them out in a little clear pot as a visual cue beside her potty.

hope it gets better for your little one soon! I really feel for you but it will get better

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