Potty training advice

[SysEngMom]

Hi, my DS is only 20 months old and as it is winter so I’m planning on starting potty training in spring.
is it too early? What is the best way to start? How do I know if he is ready?
Should I start just by taking his nappy off and take him to the toilet?

I read some of the threads but everyone got a different approach to it.

I do prefer a quick and less dirty way of doing it.

What actually worked for you?

Thank you!

My dc both potty training - wees and poos and day - in a week (dd) and 2 weeks (ds), but they were both much older - 27 months and 32 months respectively. They had a lot more cognisance of what they were doing than they would have had at 20 months, we talked about it a lot, and it was very quick and clean. DD basically said "pants today", refused to wear a nappy and was sorted in next to no time.

My DD is 28 months currently. She turned 2 in the summer but didn’t seem ready then.

What we did do though was have the potty around, she would often make her toys use it! I let her come to the toilet when I went and wed talk about it. We also read books like one called ‘no more nappies’.

Occasionally she’d show interest in using the potty or toilet herself, or just sitting on it, and we’d go with that. Then there was a bit of a phase where she’d just say no she didn’t want to and we went with that too and didn’t push it.

A couple of weeks ago she started talking about it a lot more and also saying she wanted ‘big girl knickers’. A few times she would pull her own nappy down and sit on the potty.

I waited till we had a few days at home, did a day with no nappies/ bottoms on at all and just encouraged her to try the potty really regularly. By day 2 she’d pretty much cracked wees and we were out and about (took potty with us in a bag) by day 3 and weve only ever had a couple of wee accidents since.

Poo has been a bit trickier - she did start withholding a bit and then we had some rather messy consequences. Someone recommended the ‘poo goes to Pooland’ app - it’s a weird little story about poo but bloody hell it worked, we watched it for 2 days running and on the third she pooed on the potty about 6 times and really enjoyed sending it off to Pooland!

Definitely wait for strong signs he’s ready I’d say - ie able to communicate well with you, showing signs of not wanting to wear nappy or showing interest in using nappy or toilet, beginning to indicate when they have had or need a wee/ poo.

Thank you both for your responses.

@IbizaToTheNorfolkBroads sounds like it went pretty straightforward with your kids, I heard stories from people that it can take months.

@AliasGrape thank you so much for the advice I’ll definitely try the poo story app.
i guess just waiting and going with his flow is the best way.
currently DS interested in playing with the toilet for fun and finds it very funny when you flush it, it is far from “ready to take his nappy off” though.

You can’t decide much in advance when to do it. You see they are ready — there’s a perceptible change — and then you have to act within a few days to avoid missing the window, as it then gets harder again.
Neither of my kids had more than three accidents. It was pretty much done in 12h.
What you can do now is get the potty, and see if they want to sit and try. Praise anything that gets into the potty, but it’s not the same as the control they need to always hold it.

You can't really decide when to do it, you'll know when they are ready. We started when DD was about 2.5. she was doing really well but shortly after had a big change in her life (for her) and it went to pot. We had a long break and started again after she turned 3 and she took to it really well.

We waited until DS was nearing 3yo - we were reading a book about a boy who is listening to his body.
We switched to pants during the day, deployed a star chart and used bribes - chocolate button for a wee and a chocolate digestive for a poo.
It worked well enough. We had to carry a potty to the park etc for a while until he learned weeing standing up.

We did it with DD a few weeks before she turned 2 mostly because I couldn't handle having 2 in cloth nappies. Loosely followed the Oh Crap method. So naked for a day or so, then commando, then a few weeks before adding knickers. Seem to recall day 2 being the most stressful. She did really well. A few accidents but mostly fine, still needed prompted for a few months. I think could be trusted to tell us and me to not worry about accidents after 5/6 months. Lots of friends left it later and seemed to get to the not worrying stage a bit quicker, but I guess they're all different. Or maybe 2.5 is the key age.

DS is 20m and is 100% giving me more signs of being ready than DD ever did. He grabs his nappy and goes urgh which means he's doing a pee, and runs off to hide to do a poo. Trying to decide if I have the energy to potty train him over Christmas. He's desperate to do everything his sister does so I think would love the chance to be a big boy too.

"I do prefer a quick and less dirty way of doing it"

Then wait until he's nearly 3 .

And don't believe people when they say their kids were "trained in 3 days". They don't actually tell you that they actually mean the kids got the idea of using the toilet in three days and that it was 4 months later they were reliable!

P.s. Accidents will happen!

If you start before they're ready then it will take longer - wait until you think DC is actually ready, otherwise you're setting yourself up for mess!!

No, definitely not too early.
I really recommend reading the book oh crap.
Our DS was 22 months old and was done in a week then naps and nightime followed the next month, its fabulous if you follow it properly

If i remember the basics are
Clear your diary for a week.
No nappy on DC.
Watch your child- they will have a tell before they wee/poo.
Put them on the potty when they start weeing and explain whats happening.
They soon pick it up.
Then short journeys with no undies on just joggers.
They wee before leaving the house and upon arrival of somewhere (i think)

But start teaching them now before training to push their pants down not pull as they understand it better, makes sense really.

But yes, get the book and read it fully would be my advice

Oh, and he was "reliable" within that week. Telling us he needed to go when we were out.

My kids didn’t have accidents after the first day, so in that sense they were reliable. I didn’t, however, actually rely on them for some months, so I asked about once an hour whether they needed the toilet and always had a complete change of clothes when we went out.
27 months is the average age for success. One of my children was exactly 27 months (however, I read the statistic after so purely by chance) and the other was 32 months.

My DS is also 20 months. Not started potty training yet.

My DS sometimes says “poo” while he is doing a poo in his nappy, or shortly after. And he also sometimes says “poo” just before he has a wee in his nappy.

At the moment he only says it at the time or afterwards, so I’m waiting until he starts reliably saying it before doing it.

I don’t think there’s any point starting until they have the awareness that they need to go, before they go.