Potty training hell. HELP

[Bizziee]

Hey everyone. I'm going to apologise if I ramble, it's first thing in the morning and I've not even had a coffee yet.

I am desperately struggling with potty training and honestly I just want to give up now. My little boy was 3 in October and we had already started potty training about 6 months before. I didn't think he was ready but the staff where he goes to nursery insisted he needed to start to prepare for pre school, so we started the process. I have hated every minute of it, it's been draining, discouraging and stressful and now he hates wearing his pull ups full stop.

During this journey we have tried all kinds of praise when he goes, rewards charts, stickers, special treats, different potty's, the toilet and toilet seats, pants or not pants but nothing sticks! He still isn't dry through the day. Granted it's better than it was a few months ago where he would go through all 8 changes of clothes at nursery and end up in nursery clothes by the time I picked him up. But the last few weeks we did finally seem to hit a turning point where he was having no accidents but now we're back to wetting everything again. He just pees himself and then tells me he needs to go. I am constantly asking if he needs to pee or simply putting him on but it doesn't stop the wetting. My washing machine has broken down once this year from the constant loads!! I am beyond fed up and at a total loss now. To make matters worse, he is refusing to wear his pull ups at night time too now and has consistently wet his bed every night for the past 2 weeks. If I do manage to get his pulls up on I find him in the morning butt naked, dry nappy on the floor and a wet bed. I even leave a potty in his room for him and explain that if he needs to use it he can, but of course, he does not 😫

I am using waterproof sheets on his bed and have ordered bed pads and training pants to try to ease the stress but OH MY GOD. Please, someone help me lol because I don't know how much more of this I can take. It's actually putting me off of having another child because I just can't bare to go through this potty training business all over again 😭😭😭 What do I do!!!???

You poor poor thing, and your poor little one.
Personally, I think you received terrible advice to continue when your little one was clearly not ready and it has resulted in all this stress.
But, that's besides the point really, what you need is suggestions. It's obviously becoming a huge thing for both of you- can I ask how you and others react when he wets himself? Is it a big drama? When my daughter had a potty training regression, I literally said 'oh a bit of wee-wee, that happens' and changed her without another word about it, so she wouldnt feel like it was a big thing.
It's become such a big thing that the only thing I can think of is to completely ignore and just change him whilst talking about other things so it becomes not a thing again?

Back in nappies and start again in the spring when it is drier and warmer. Potty in the bedroom bathroom and upstairs and downstairs etc don’t ask them if they need to go. Tell them every 30 minutes sit on the potty. If they were or poo great - sticker on the chart and get them to help clear it up.

for me you need to do it when you can dry outside but 20 or more pairs of pants etc
at Night wee before bed and then dream wee - you pick them up and put them on the toilet etc

I do sometimes lose my cool but for the most part I just ignore it, put him on the toilet and change him into a fresh pair of pants. I've tried the ott praise when he gets to the toilet before wetting himself but he still just seems to get bored. He is actually a lot better at going for a poo though, we rarely have poo accidents it's just pee. I wouldn't say he drinks more than he should either and it's strictly water 🙉

I tried to go back to nappies a few weeks ago but he was having none of it. Would literally throw a mighty tantrum and eventually take it off anyway 😭 even at nursery when the staff have ran out of trousers and pants have had the same reaction to a nappy

Once you get the nappy on have you tried putting something over the top? Our daughter only wears a nappy at night and will try to take it off if we don't put something over the top. We normally use a zipped onesie and put it on backwards and that does the trick. Even if you can get nighttime mastered so that you and DS can get a good night sleep. As PP said, just go back to complete basics, set a timer for 20/30 minutes and just put him on the potty every time, you could try bribing him with chocolate buttons.

Try putting him in a onesie for bedtime and turn it so the zip is facing backwards and turn it inside out. This will stop him from taking his nappy off. I did this after my 3y8m daughter decided to take her poopy nappy off in the night and (TMI) got poop all over her mattress, bed linen, pillows, her face and the walls. It was a lot of cleaning and smelled terrible. When we did the backwards and inside out onesie it never happened again.