3 year old wont poo on potty

Eliz87 · 2022-12-18T15:09:37+00:00

Does anyone have any suggestions? We started potty training about 3-4 months ago and we’ve cracked wee’s. We have very few accidents. Pooing on the other hand is totally different. He just does not want to poo in the potty or on the toilet at all. I’ve tried every bribe under the sun. He’s going to be turning 4 in January and I’m getting worried that we aren’t going to get there. I’m at a loss now. Is anyone else having the same struggles?

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bedtimestories · 18/12/2022 15:27

Check out ERIC bladder and bowel charity website. Lots of useful info and a helpline run by people who have been through it too

Adelais · 18/12/2022 15:33

Get him to watch ‘Poo goes to pooland’ on YouTube. Worked for some people I know.

Redebs · 18/12/2022 15:44

A lot of children hate doing poo on potty, because it's so gross in their little opinions.

At this age, you can talk to them about the fact that the toilet is best for taking away the waste. Spend time flushing, singing, sharing books about toilets and so on.

Some people just leave off the nappy until the child has no option, but that can lead to constipation and emotional stress for many kids.

Hopefully you are talking to him about when you need to go, how good the toilet is at getting rid of stinky poo, how much better you feel afterwards etc etc

It can be a real nuisance for him at nursery, because staff will be fine with dealing with wet pullup pants, but won't want to clean a dirty bum unless he has other special needs.

He will eventually get the idea that poo goes in the loo, but I agree it's a bit grim until he dies.

Redebs · 18/12/2022 15:44

OMG meant to say it's a bit grim until he DOES!

Mindymomo · 18/12/2022 15:53

I had this with my eldest, he would hold it in and go behind the sofa and poo his pants or beg me to put a nappy on. After a few days doing this, I told him we wouldn’t be going out until he’d been on the toilet, he hated the potty. I knew he was desperate to go, so we sat in bathroom with drinks, his favourite books and I told him stories that I knew would take his mind off holding it in. We were late going to relatives, but we needed to sort this. He did finally go and we obviously made a fuss and he agreed it was better going on the toilet. My son is now 30 I still remember as if was yesterday.

LateMumma · 18/12/2022 16:22

This happened for our daughter. We spoke to the HV, who said it's quite common. She suggested we do it gradually, poo in nappy but sitting on toilet, then cut a small hole in nappy making it larger each time she did a poo. Was sorted in 3 days. Good luck

Original poster

Eliz87 · 18/12/2022 17:31

Thanks everyone. He’s no problem at all pooing in his undies. He’s not holding it in. I thought I had a little breakthrough earlier. I asked if he would do some trumps on the potty which he did but he’s seen right through me now 😂 I was hoping trumps would turn in to poo. We only use nappies at night time now and he doesn’t ask for one to poo in. He also never has a poo at nursery. Saves it all for home time.

OP posts:

Noonesperfect · 18/12/2022 18:58

LateMumma · 18/12/2022 16:22

This happened for our daughter. We spoke to the HV, who said it's quite common. She suggested we do it gradually, poo in nappy but sitting on toilet, then cut a small hole in nappy making it larger each time she did a poo. Was sorted in 3 days. Good luck

I had exactly the same issue with my daughter many years ago. Unfortunately health visitor was no help whatsoever and said my daughter was just trying to play me up, and send me on a b***y parenting course! Fortunately I did exactly what your Health visitor advised you to do, I decided this plan of action myself. Glad to see some health visitors are better these days.

Chichz · 18/12/2022 19:04

Can you explain a bit morr what you mean with the hole in the nappy? Sorry, I find these things very hard to visualise 😂

Genuinely interested for when we try (round 2!) of potty training after Xmas.

X

Chichz · 18/12/2022 19:05

More* and that was meant to quote @LateMumma, which didn't seem to happen.

LateMumma · 18/12/2022 19:31

I think the idea was that the sensation changes, so cut a small hole under the bum where the poo will land, that gets a bit bigger every time. So the poo eventually passes through the hole into the loo, but the nappy is still being worn. Does that make sense? Not sure I'm describing it well. I think that might be the most times I've ever typed 'poo' in one para 😆

Chichz · 18/12/2022 19:34

Thanks 😂 So the idea is eventually they are 'doing a poo' on the potty/toilet because it falls through?

The things we have to do as parents!

MillieA4 · 01/01/2023 08:06

When my DD was 3y10m we had a similar problem. We thought it was because she liked the feeling of pooing in her nappy (maybe because she didn’t feel like she was loosing a part of her body making it less scary). So, we decided to let her wear her underwear as usual but told her to ask for a nappy when she needed a poo. We would put her in one, sit her down on the potty and let her do her business. Then we changed her nappy and made her watch as we flushed it away and told her that was where poos go. She kept peeing on the potty but would ask us for a nappy when she needed to do a poo. This stopped the constipation and after a month we got her to take it off. I hope this helps.

Bagsundermyeyestoday · 01/01/2023 08:11

Eliz87 · 18/12/2022 17:31

Thanks everyone. He’s no problem at all pooing in his undies. He’s not holding it in. I thought I had a little breakthrough earlier. I asked if he would do some trumps on the potty which he did but he’s seen right through me now 😂 I was hoping trumps would turn in to poo. We only use nappies at night time now and he doesn’t ask for one to poo in. He also never has a poo at nursery. Saves it all for home time.

Sorry this is irrelevant, but it makes me laugh. I bet he'll be an adult (like me) who won't poo at work. Good luck OP hopefully others can offer you proper advice!

PooStudyUoS · 07/08/2023 12:04

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