Daughter 3.3 months not potty trained

[Babyfairy0923]

Looking for some advice.
I have had several attempts at potty training my daughter previously and then today I have tried again- she shows all the signs of being ready- telling me when she’s done a wee & going off to do a poo alone etc.
Today she refused to sit on the potty or toilet all day, I managed to get her on a couple of times but she didn’t willingly want to, she held her urine all day until bath time ☹️ I told her well done and made a fuss when she did it in the bath as she had been asking for a pull up all day.
Any advice?
Do I continue tomorrow or wait longer??
I hate seeing her so upset about it ☹️

I trained my son last month aged 3y4m. He too was very initially reluctant and said he didn't want to wear pants etc.
I read Who Gives a Crap and followed a few principles loosely but I mainly just put him on the potty every 30 mins and used a sticker chart.

If she held her wee all day then she is already toilet trained, she just doesn't want to do it in a potty.

Can you buy her one of those child seats for the loo? You could cut a hole in the bottom of a pull up and ask her to sit on the toilet to do a wee.

She just sounds a bit apprehensive which is understandable. Good luck!

My sons the same age and I'm struggling with this too! We got one of those padded seat things that go on the toilet but he's still terrified he'll fall in. I got a potty and he will sit on it but won't do anything, I leave him nappy-less in the day and he asks for a nappy, so knows when he wants to go, but he will hold it if I put him on the potty when he asks for a nappy. I'll try the sticker chart aswell. My 7 year old Ds seems to be enjoying demonstrating using the potty for him a bit too much

That’s exactly what I thought- I was shocked she held it so long. Obviously it isn’t great for them to hold it in too long health wise but I didn’t realise that she could.
I will try a loo seat! I tried her on it but we don’t have one of those.

@MinnieJackson it’s so hard isn’t it, my daughter is so stubborn, I’m sure she was trying to prove a point today 🤦‍♀️ Good luck! 😂 My DD has been helping her too, bless them!

@FrancesFlute thanks for the tips!! Fingers crossed. I’m going to try again tomorrow & give her extra drinks too so hopefully it will be impossible for her to hold it.

Mine is finally potty trained, 3 year 4 months

It was a long a painful process

Be stubborn, persistent and consistent

Get rid of the nappies during the day. Be prepared for accidents. Put down puppy pads. Keep potty in sight

Teach her how to push down knickers etc

Don't go backwards now or it's mixed messages

@pantonepenny thank you!! She’s perfect at pulling the pants up & down & she’s not peeing everywhere- I know she can do it which makes it even more frustrating. She just wants to do it a nappy and nowhere else. I shall be persistent thank you, I needed to hear that!! 👍

Both my daughters were like this. They could hold for 8 hours before I would cave and give them a nappy.

Turns out they both hated the potty and ended up biomass it it for the toilet.

I feel your pain. It was really hard at the time but the one positive it that as soon as they went on the toilet there was never any accidents day or night.

I meant bypassing it!

@zoemum2006 thank you!! I have older children who were both trained by 2.5 & quite straight forward so this is all new to me! I almost caved with the nappy today as I felt so bad for her holding it!! I have just bought a toilet seat, the one that has the steps up to it so I’m hoping for more luck tomorrow!!

Mine are 3y4m and are not getting it at all really. I’ve kind of given up for a little while, if we get a wee in the toilet that’s great, otherwise I’m waiting.

I’ve no idea how to do it really, but had had them without nappies/pull ups and it was disastrous.

Mine used to hold it for hours even in pull ups. With hindsight I think her daycare annoyed her by sticking her on the potty every 30 minutes and it became a stubborn stand off. We kept her home, did no bottoms, bypassed the potty for a toilet seat, pumped her full of liquid (juice, ice lollies, everything we could think of) and bribed for going with skittles. It worked instantly. Still has an infamous bladder of steel but at least we don’t have to worry about accidents on long car journeys! Good luck for tomorrow, she will get there.

My daughter was like this. I bought one of those pottys that look like mini toilets Christmas Eve last year. She was so excited about the flush button but I told her she couldn't press it unless she did a wee on the potty. Within three days she was using the potty full time with no accidents. Two weeks later she was dry at night as well. She was a bit apprehensive about using the toilet but within a couple if weeks she would swap and change between the two.
She was 3 years 2 months when I trained her, any attempt before resulting in her refusing or holding it in all day.

@MuchTooTired good luck, it’s so tough!!

@LakeShoreD thank you!! Definitely a plan to pump her full of liquids!! I really hope she gets there soon!

@stormelf we have one of those toilet potty’s! I thought she would love it & she kind of does but seems to be more keen on using the real toilet now. Spent a small fortune on it too 🤦‍♀️😂

No improvement so far 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

Chocolate coins, it's the only way (or jelly babies) one for a wee and two for a pop

I had one of these. She was my third child, and incredibly stubborn like yours. She held her wee for 8 hours, I was stressed! DH sat her on the potty and she cried, didn't want to use it but clearly needed to go. While she was sitting on the potty DH distracted her and made her laugh, this was enough for her to let go and finally go on the potty. Once she's done that once and got such praise she was fine.

Good luck! Stubborn little girls are hard work. :)

puzzles & books whilst sitting on potty (pp dh did good!) Distraction & making sure its not seen as a punishment - traditionally they use to use almost a time table - potting before & after bath potting on getting up
best time is in sunny weather so you can keep them in the garden as much as possible

Not much improvement so far. Managed a wee on the toilet this morning but I had to keep her on it unwillingly for a minute as I could see she was desperate. She’s still holding it 🤦‍♀️

She is probably finding it a big change, but if she keeps using the toilet and getting huge praise hopefully she will get that it's a good thing.

One of mine was that age. Bribery - praise, big claps, stickers, sweetie, beads (save them in a jar and make a bracelet when there is enough). I also just put a potty behind the sofa so it was available for her to take herself off but be a bit private too.

We bribed dd with chocolate buttons. I've also heard that blowing bubbles while on the loo can help as it distracts and then the muscles relax.