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Potty training

Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

Help! 2.9 month refusing to use potty and holding in.

3 replies

bananainpjs · 19/06/2021 13:22

Hello,

I bought a potty (the mini toilet looking ones) back in December and was hoping to potty train my little one over the holidays.

He refused and would sit on it with his nappy on but not without it. So I left it..and tried every month but still the same.

I asked nursery and they said to leave it so he doesn’t regress.

I asked the health visitor last month and she said take away his nappies and see what happens.

Yesterday I told him there is no more nappies and he happily put on his big boy pants. I thought, great! However I soon realised that he just thought they were nappies too. He had an accident and he told me he was wet. I said okay, next time do it in the potty. He had another accident, I said next time in the potty please you don’t want your clothes to get wet. He then took off his trousers and wouldn’t wear them in case they got wet.
However he then would still not wee in the potty and got really upset and clung on to me all day. He kept his wee in and held on to his willie and withdrew himself. He just sat on the sofa and wouldn’t play. As soon as I put on his nighttime nappy, he was back to his happy self and did a poo. He obviously was also keeping the poo in.

This morning, I tried again and he refused to play and told me he needed to poo but no to the potty. He wanted to wear a nappy. He’s even refusing to wear pull ups, which he used to be happy to wear.

He is being really stubborn and I feel like this is going to be hard work.

He’s also really shy about doing a poo and would always do it somewhere. He’s fully aware in my opinion so I don’t think it’s because he’s not ready…he just doesn’t want to do it anywhere other than his nappy.

Is there anything else I can buy to help me?
What do I do?

Nurses have told me that all his friends are potty training and feel under pressure now Sad

He was great transitioning to full fat milk, teat to no teat bottle etc.

I feel like a failure.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
charley39 · 19/06/2021 22:00

I personally would leave it a bit longer maybe? It sounds like it might be too much for him at this stage. If your getting stressed he’s going to pick up on that as well. Easier said than done I know!

I have just potty trained my DS at 3yrs 4 months. Mine too is extremely stubborn and will not do something if he doesn’t want to. I think you have to get to a point where he doesn’t want to wet himself etc. My DS wet himself on the 1st day of training and he hated it so I feel that helped him realise he had to use the potty if he didn’t want that feeling again.

I think you may find giving it a few more weeks will help at least give you both a break. I would leave the potty around so he can hopefully get used to it etc. Sorry I don’t have anything really useful to say just didn’t want to read and run as I was also after any advice I could get! I also got really stressed about the fact that everyone said he should be potty trained by now and everyone else I knew had potty trained their children.

I know they recommend as well to start potty training when life is quite settled as much as possible and sleep is going well as I know especially with my DS he can be a nightmare when he’s tired!

Best of luck!!! Smile

Snowpaw · 21/06/2021 17:50

Regarding the poo shyness - my daughter was a bit like that. Also 2.9. She likes to run into another room to poo and then would poo on the floor. I have cracked it by closing the door to the room we’re in and putting the potty somewhere out of my sight, eg the other end of the sofa on the floor, or in a corner, then she couldn’t “escape” and when I saw the “I’m going to poo” look cross her face I just quickly prompted “potty’s in the corner quick quick quick” and she’d go to it and i’d give her space to do it herself without hovering over her, and she’s done really well now and is happy to poo on it.

HavelockVetinari · 21/06/2021 17:57

DS (3) will still only poo in a nappy whilst he'll happily take himself off for a wee.

He was like your son at first, so we told him he can poo in a nappy and wee in the toilet (he wouldn't use a potty at all, we got a toddler seat for the loo).

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