3 year old son refuses to pee in the toilet

[senorita81]

I have been toilet training for over a month now with very little success. My son is 3 and just hates peeing in the toilet or potty. He is happy to just do it in his pants and will sit in wet clothes, it doesn't bother him. He knows what he has to do and where his pee is supposed to go but just doesn't tell me when he needs to go. I don't know what I am supposed to do as I have tried everything, standing up peeing, books about the potty, sticker rewards, I bought the Oh Crap book to follow that method, it didn't work.

I even made him sit in the toilet till he went and that took over an hour and he was really distressed so I stopped that.
He is due to start pre school in September as well. He is also in the process of being assessed for potential ASD so I don't know if this might be anything to do with it.
I have run out of ideas. Can anyone help??

I am kind of in the same boat. My son is not yet 3 (Nov) and is perfectly capable of using the potty, will go pee pee on the potty unless he has something better to do then he just goes in his pants, and announces he has wet pants and needs dry one. He has been pooh trained for months. Didn’t even train him for that he just worked that out for himself. Have tried everything. Now we’re just beyond frustrated but in limbo, do we just give up and out him back in pull ups accepting he’ll do it when HE wants to and save ourselves the washing... am also here for inspiration. Even the nursery have said he doesn’t care in the least if he’s wet. Love to hear if you have any success. Sorry am not able to give advice. But wanted to show solidarity.

Ours was a bit like this then he started peeing in the garden behind bushes. He knew he was being a bit naughty and that really appealed to a mischievous little man. A week or two of that and he finally sorted himself out inside too.

ERIC, a continence charity produced a great little book called 'Poo goes to Pooland' or similar, I'm pretty sure a off is available online. It is aimed at 'witholders' of poo, but the message is such that I can imagine it working for a wee as well. It worked within a few days for my DC who both didn't want to poo on the toilet, it might be worth looking it up and changing the story slightly for weeing. Good luck!

Could you make it in to a game? You can buy stickers that go inside the toilet which they gave to aim for, that might be worth a try? If you start it off as a game that the adults in your house play then see if he wants to join in, rather than making it just for him. I know that sounds weird but if you can make him want to do it instead of you making him it might help!