Oh crap method versus waiting til 'ready'

[Rubyroost]

So the oh crap says best time is between 20 and 30 months. My boy is coming up to 30 months. However, from what I read on here and from mum's it seems most wait until their child is 'ready' and seems to be nearer 36 months.
I don't know whether to try and train toddler or wait until signs of readiness. He doesn't tell me before he needs a wee or pooh, he doesn't hide to do a pooh etc. He has been introduced to a potty and I tried a day in training pants, he seemed oblivious apart from the first time he weed he came to tell me he was doing a wee when he was doing it. After that he just kept weeing and was oblivious. We decided not to carry on as my 3 month old was a bit poorly and it was quite exhausting. I'm wanting to try again, but don't really know whether I should or whether to wait a while. Any advice would be brill.

@DramaAlpaca so you managed it fairly quickly without going bare bum?

@pinguwings is it possible to watch toddler like a hawk with 3 month baby?

Waited until ready with all of mine (which happened almost bang on age 3). They all got it in a day or two, never had any accidents and they were all dry at night just a couple of weeks later. Very easy for me and no anxiety for the DC.

I have friends who did it much earlier it and their DC seemed to have issues with withholding etc.

[quote Rubyroost]@pinguwings is it possible to watch toddler like a hawk with 3 month baby?[/quote]
I potty trained my youngest at 24 months while also childminding two younger children in the day and an extra four before and after school, so yes it's possible.
I didn't go to any toddler groups for the first week.

While it’s nice weather, and if you have a garden, you can always head outside for Stage 1 of the oh crap method. We went for it with DD at about 2y4m over a bank holiday weekend, spent the days out in the garden with a potty as she started to get the hang of everything.

@Enterthedragons that is my dilemma, as I hear that it is easier at this age and from people I know they wait until later and less accidents. But then the o crap method, which is the one everyone hails as THE METHOD says 20 to 30 months and anything after is too late!

Is there a reason you want / need to have dc out of nappies? If yes, try it. If not, wait til they're ready!

I actively potty trained my first as I was going back to work after my second. It was fine - as you'd expect, some accidents, lots of putting on the potty just in case etc etc but overall okay or so I thought.

With my second, it hadn't even come on to my radar when he decided he wasn't going to wear a nappy any more. I went with it the first day as we were at home but the next day we had to go out so I wanted him in a nappy but he refused and didn't go back in one during the day again. He's probably only ever had about 10 accidents and he's now at school. It still amazes me now but now I would advise to wait til they're ready - it's a doddle!

I used the oh crap method for my 23 month old, she was fairly reliable from about 4 days and is fairly accident free, only the odd occasion when she has been engrossed in her ipad but we have learned!
Did take 2 days of watching like a hawk
She didn't show any signs such as saying she had done a pee/poo before training

I just can't get my head round choosing a whole extra year of disposable nappies and wipes going into landfill to avoid a couple of weeks of accidents
Not that it's even guaranteed to work - I know a few people who've had an absolute nightmare training 3.5 year olds.

So I sat him on potty watching TV... Nothing. He was on there for about an hour. 🙈Put wellies on and took potty out to garden. He started whingeing. I said do you need a wee. He repeated I need a wee. Helped him sit down on potty and he did a wee! Is this just a coincidence or a sign he might be ready. So I'm going to persevere. How many days nuddy? What do you do about walks?

How long does the Oh crap method take?

I would go for a hybrid. Every few months try for a few days. If not making good progress (so maybe 75% of weeks in potty) by end of day three or four, stop for now.

I'm not sure tbh and I can't afford a week. I think three days nuddy then commando for a few days and then training pants. Although can't see advantage with commando with boys as surely cotton pants feel just like trousers? Any ideas anyone?

I meant can't afford the book.

I never made mine sit on the potty for an hour (really?) just had them in no pants for the first couple of days and watched carefully - got them on the potty as soon as they looked like they needed a wee or started to do a wee then praise and reward.
As soon as you’ve had a few successes on the potty get them wearing pants.

@Rubyroost in answer to your question, I did pretty much exactly what @SandieCheeks did. In the house it was bare bum for the first couple of days, then pants, then braved going out fully dressed out for a quick walk.

Keep going, it sounds like he's getting the idea.

This no pants method only works up to a point tho. I didn't want him getting friction burns on his slide and zit looked like his penis was gonna underneath his bum so had to put pants and trousers on. 🤞

Okay, a very very tired mum here. So toddler has had a right day, don't know if he's in a mood because I'm trying to train him or if he's just having one of those days. Refused to wear shoes in garden, had a hissy fit over everything. Didn't want to go in garden, had a hissy fit when he pressed wrong thing on ioad, had a hissy fit when the sweetcorn fell off fork (several times), had a hissy fit when he got covered in dirty water from pooling in the lawnmower and got taken in, had a hissy fit (and a piss 😂) in the shower. Had a hissy fit when we got out the shower. So first two wees after I took his nappy off after breakfast (that's when I decided to go for it) went in potty. I thought good start, after that it went down hill. Did a dribble when sat on a mat, I went to move him on to potty and he just stopped (I did wonder if he was holding it in. Then we went outside and because he wanted to go down slide I put his trousers on (didn't want friction marks on his bum) no sooner as I did he did the big wee we were waiting for. Again, seems like he'd been holding it in as I'd put him on potty a couple of times before. Then later he weed in the shower, again as soon as he was in the shower, almost like he'd held on. Then I put him in nappy whilst he ate dinner. I suppose hes supposed to be naked whilst he sits on high chair too? He did say he needed a wee wee whilst we were eating so I put him on potty, but nothing. He did wee in his nappy whilst he was eating though. So I wonder if he's feeling something and then can't go, as he did this twice, said weewee, got him on nappy, nothing and then 5 mins later had a wee. Right, tomorrow is a new day and we shall try again. 😬

Got him on potty, not nappy!

I’m in a similar position OP. DS is 32 months (to be exact!) and not particularly keen. He seems to find the potty quite funny and will mess about with it. He asks to go on sometimes but only occasionally pees on it. Often he’ll sit there for several minutes - nothing- then get off and shortly after pee in nappy. No poos in potty. He never tell someone me when he needs it and if he’s playing he’ll often ignore prompting/ suggestion to sit on it. I guess if following the book we wouldn’t suggest it, we’d just put them on when we know they’re about to go/ going - but you can only do that if commando.

I feel like I need to go the whole hog and ditch the nappies as per the oh crap method but to be honest I’ve been avoiding that as I’m not relishing the thought of having to literally watch him constantly then rush him onto the potty, plus we have cream carpets everywhere and it’s going to be very messy. But I know we have to eventually, I’m just putting it off if I’m honest.

But as you say, i do wonder if (despite what the book says) it’s quicker and easier when they’re ‘ready’ by which I mean not wanting to wear nappy, asking to go on potty consistently etc. My friends DD just refused to wear nappies one week and that was it.

But what if that never happens?! I don’t want a 4 year old in nappies 😂 I do feel like it’ll be easier to explain things / reason with him when he’s a bit older but then again I’d like to get it done and dusted.

It’s tough - I think I’m going to try to go for the commando method from tomorrow when the weather’s nice and hope for the best!

DD is 21 months and has done a couple of random pees on the potty - am sort of hoping her brother will want to get going with it if she does first!

Nice to see you here @bumblenbean. Perhaps we can check in and give each other moral support.
Your issues sound quite similar to mine. We spent a good bit of time in the garden and some time in the house today sitting on mats. Im like you and don't like the idea of pissy carpets! Guess we will have to get over that if we want to potty train! I'm going to spend quite a bit of time in the garden again tomorrow, like you say we have a good few days where the weather is reasonably nice.
My boy is 29.5 months and I would like him trained for 3. I think I'm like you and have this vision of him still being in nappies late on, which I don't want. He also prats about with his potty, uses it for storage for his feltips etc. 😬

I trained my son when he was around 30 months. I put him straight into cotton pants and bought an egg timer in the shape of a funny animal he liked. I introduced it as his 'pee pee clock' and said when it rings then he tries to go to the toilet. I never used a potty went straight on to the loo. I found it really effective as it reminded both me and him to try regularly and he rarely had an accident - i was just able to gradually increase the length of time it was set for as he could hold it for longer. If i thought he should have needed a pee but didn't go id set it for 10/15 mins later to try again, as he got better if he was able to tell me he didn't need to go i could just increase the time. It really reduced any arguments or strops as it his was his pee pee clock (that he loved) telling him to try instead of me if that makes sense. It came everywhere with us for weeks but worked absolutely brilliantly. I found prior to using this most accidents were because he was being lazy or too engrossed in playing so the sound as a reminder really worked a treat.

I like this idea @Ali612 I'm gonna keep going with what we've been doing, but I might invest in a peepee clock if I don't have much joy.

Also after today I've decided that I'm not going to have another day where we can't go out just because I'm sticking to this method. I'm going to mix it up a bit. I'm going to go out for a walk tomorrow and put a nappy on him if I need to. I think potty training is stressful enough.

I’m up for that @Rubyroost

Haha lol at the pratting about with the potty- i discovered DS running his toy Thomas around the bottom of it today. He will also sit on it fully clothed to watch the tv 🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️

I thought about putting it out of sight to discourage using it as a toy, but then figured it will simply sit there gathering dust as he’ll never ask to use it then - out of sight out of mind!

Yeah the carpet thing is stressing me out but I suppose we don’t have much choice...

I think they do hold on, at this age - they know they wee in their nappies, and they don’t want to “wet themselves”. DS was very distressed about weeing without his nappy and absolutely held on (sitting on the potty getting increasingly distressed and asking for his nappy because he knew he needed to go).

Once he’d done it once, and understood that was what we wanted, he was basically trained. We sat him on there for ages (with a tablet) until he went, basically. Then praised him like made so he knew that’s what we wanted him to do.

It it's many years now since I potty trained my son. He was cloth nappied and went to nursery. Once he turned 2 they started to take him out of nappies and he came home having being changed several times a day because he just wasn't ready. I asked them to stop but as soon as I got him home took him out of trousers and nappy and I would say 75% of the time successfully used his potty or the loo ( we bought a little loo seat that sat on the big one to make it easier for him). Then when he was about 27 months old he went on a trip with my husband a couple of hours away in the car. When they got where they were going, his nappy was dry and he asked for his potty. He was dry in the daytime from that moment on. Luckily I'd packed some pants and my husband dealt with it all that first weekend!.

He didn't go dry at night until he was about 4.5 he started refusing to wear nappies at night time it took about a fortnight to go completely dry, but we and he persevered and by the time he started school he was done.

I don't know of the method you have quoted, but bare bum time definitely helped my ds recognise what was happening, there were definitely a few accidents and when we cleaned up, I just used to comment that it would be much easier if he'd done that in the loo or potty!

Don't stress out or make a big deal of it, it's a natural function and kids pick up on your anxieties.