3 yo has untrained himself

[MerryDeath]

He's been potty trained since xmas and turned 3 two weeks ago. we had a new baby in january who he has taken to very positively.

however in the last week or so he's had what seems like a full regression. so we went back to the beginning taking him to the loo when we say not waiting for him, every 30 min or so. but now he's pitching an absolute fit about going to the loo when i asked (more like every hour or two now, full on lying on floor, screaming, crying. this is really more of a rant than anything as DH is away for work so i'm 100% alone 24/7 with baby and toddler AND THEN ds lies down to have a scream about going to the loo and i'm getting so angry it's starting to worry me (i haven't felt very good this week i think my cycle is restarting great that's all i need 😖) and he's still having accidents, came in from garden yesterday with a full poo in his pants. actually did poo on the lawn earlier in the week. often has small wee leaks. i could cope with all that if we didn't have to have a screaming row about going for a wee every. single. time.

What does he want? If you ask him would he like to have nappies again does he say yes? If so I’d just do it. It might just be a phase or a sign of how unsettled he feels right now. It won’t be permanent.

My DS was 3 in Feb and has also gone full gremlin about being asked to go to the toilet! We’ve had some success the last few days by telling him each morning that he is in charge of going to the toilet and we’re not going to keep asking him. I offered him to go back to nappies which he didn’t want, then we talked about how it doesn’t feel nice to have wet pants. Couple of accidents but he’s generally been ok. I think it’s just that age where whatever you ask the answer is no!

Mine too! Me and her dad have just separated though and obviously no nursery so I thought I was being a terrible parent with so much upheaval. This makes me feel better! I am going back to sticker chart today!

I think this is normal (certainly happened for us and most of my friends). The current situation is probably stressing him out a bit too.
Perhaps play it down a bit and let him say when he needs the loo rather than you tell him, as you know he can do this. If he has an accident, get him to help clear up (put pants in the wash etc.) so it takes him a lot longer to deal with than if he'd just used the loo in the first place. What helped with mine was insisting he had a quick shower with every accident (he was the youngest so we didn't have baby wipes in the house once he was trained). We also didn't wait for him so if he had an accident when watching TV, he missed the rest of the programme. He didn't particularly enjoy this and helped him realise that it was better no to wet in the first place. Just to be clear, these weren't genuine accidents, more of a case of not being bothered to stop what he was doing to go to the loo on time.

My 3yo was doing this still 6m after we started. I wish I'd put him back in nappies and re tried months later.
But it's obviously hard to recommend for another child.

he doesn't want nappies again. i've tried making him have a shower each time too. just more tantrums. i left him
to it and he's just weed in his shorts 😞

You are in charge - just put nappies back on.

I'm doing exactly the same now, no ifs, no buts.

I came here to say exactly the same thing. My almost 3 year old has regressed since the lockdown started and I've put her back in nappies. She has gone from taking herself to toilet to peeing everywhere. My patience is wearing thin and I'm constantly reminding myself that it's not her fault.

I've got the same issue, been potty training my 2.5 month old for 3 months and it was all going so well, I thought we had wees cracked. Now every time I ask her if she needs to go it's always 'no', she never tells me she needs to go and will just do little wees in her pants until her bladder is too full or I force her to go. I think the novelty has worn off, sticker charts didn't work. I don't want to go back to nappies as I know she can do it, but am so tired of constant accidents and the blank look she gives me when I ask her why she didn't tell me. It feels like a battle of wills! Due 2nd baby in 5 weeks too so that's not helping! Anyone with any tips will be gratefully received!

I've gone back to nappies. Only 4 weeks into potty training. But a complete turn around after 2 dry weeks and a very stressful week of him holding his wee , one day he held it for hours and hours, can't be good for him. Today is the 3rd back in nappies and it's so much better not to get irritated or stressed by all the accidents and tantrums. He's nearly 3. I feel for you with the new baby and hormones. I can't believe how differently I manage things on my non hormonal weeks compared to the bad weeks.

Bribe him with smarties or chocolate buttons -gets one for each pee in the toilet and the whole bloody packet for a poo!

Your child has regressed to pre-toilet training stage. The new baby is causing him stress that he does not know how to handle, so he is reverting back to a time where this stress did not exist. You will have to re-diaper him and allow him to settle before going forward. He is missing the one to one interaction with you, which you will have to wean him off it. Give him some 'fake' responsibility with your new child and you will be amazed on how fast he bounces back.