Advice needed for second push....

[YukoandHiro]

Here's the background:
Been training my 2y 7m old for about six weeks now. She knows what to do and we have dry days but we have two issues:

1. at home she seems to relax and no longer care about using the toilet. She'll happily wee on the sofa, for example, and not tell us that she has wet knickers
2. poos are very rarely anticipated
3. she doesn't seem to care very much about staying clean - although she's proud of her successes. A lot of the books we've read talk about how "everyone has accidents" and she just repeats that line proudly to me.

The star chart we had at the beginning to get us going has lost all interest.

Has anyone got any ideas? I'm really struggling - to add to everything I am 8 weeks pregnant and have HG, signed off work and exhausted. I really need us to move forward from this stage as I'm starting to get short with her with frustration (which I realise is counter productive).

I’ve always been of the opinion that if it’s hard work, it’s too soon. However, since you’ve stuck it out for 6 weeks you might as well keep going.

Do you put her on the toilet/potty yourself or wait til she asks? I plonked mine on at regular intervals throughout the day, which worked for us.

Quite honestly I found it easier to train my 18 year old cat to use different toileting methods than my DS.
Can you go back to pull ups until the weeing on the sofa stops because that isn't funny at all. Tell her she isn't ready for big girl pants yet.

Yes I'm aware I probably went for training too soon but the first few days went really well so I didn't realise til it was a bit too late. Also I didn't know I was pregnant when we started. Goddamn it. But we made too much progress to go back. She point blank refuses pull ups in the day now.

Thanks will stick at it. Does anyone think there are any incentives that would help at this stage?

This afternoon has been particularly rubbish.

@MazDazzle yes we put her on regularly and she goes immediately she sits - no hovering or hanging around waiting anymore. She nailed that bit within a week. But sometimes she point blank refuses to go on either potty or toilet and then just has an accident.

What's interesting is that she very rarely has an accident outside our house or her nursery room - eg never in park or in the pram. I know she can do it; it's almost like a stubbornness now and also the fact that she really doesn't seem to care that much bout being wet. Friends have told me that their kids got distressed after accidents. She's never ever done that

Another vote here for going back to pullups when at home.
I know it seems like a step backwards but it's really not, and if she really doesn't like them just the idea of having them again might be enough to give her that little push.

Fill a reward basket with cheap toys from £1 shop for every 3 stickers she picks a prize. Once chart is full a bigger prize something she really wants or a special outing.