Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Potty training

Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

Flip

1 2 3

Original poster

Almost 5 and still wets the bed?

65 replies

User9797 · 06/03/2019 07:45

My son is almost 5 years old and still wets the bed sometimes. It’s maybe once or twice a month but strangely enough it only happens when he’s got a sheet on the bed. Now obviously I always make sure there is a sheet on the bed but I’ve experimented a few times by leaving it off for periods of time and it never happens when there is no sheet. (I know every time it happens because he will tell me) He gets upset when he tells me because he knows he shouldn’t be doing it but he can’t tell me why. I’ve asked him if he’s too scared to go but I know he does go sometimes. I’ve asked him if he’s just being lazy but he won’t answer me. I’ve asked him if he just wakes up and finds that he has wet himself but he won’t give me an answer. Yesterday I put the sheet on after having it off for a whole week and low and behold the first night he pees the bed.

Beyond frustrated, I don’t want to have to keep the sheet off forever because I know that’s unfair but the mattress is being ruined with how many times he pees. I know I’m going to have to buy a protector. Help please?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

hazeyjane · 09/03/2019 13:17

Asda has reduced kids stuff atm

Sheet, duvet and protector for about £15. Nappies in bulk.

GaraMedouar · 09/03/2019 13:22

I have three children - youngest age dry at night was 2, one off them was7 nearly 8! They all vary.

I would suggest you use a waterproof sheet, topped with a sheet, then another waterproof sheet, topped with another sheet, so a double layer. When he does wet, you can just whip off top layer. It's only a couple of times a month, not a problem.

ASqueakingInTheShrubbery · 09/03/2019 13:23

Mattress protector, about £7 from Amazon.

Puppy pads, £12 for 100 at Pets at Home.

Sheet.

Another couple of pads across bed

Another sheet

Layer up a couple of layers like this and then all you have to do in the night is whip off the wet sheet and pads.

My 5yo still has accidents every now and then. I'd be more worried if it was every night but it's usually if she's under the weather or extra tired.

Piglet208 · 09/03/2019 13:25

This must all be very new to you. Nighttime dryness happens when a particular hormone is produced. The age for this is very variable. It sounds like the boy isn't ready yet so you might be best to buy some nighttime pull ups. When you notice that these are regularly dry in the morning be prepared with a waterproof mattress protector and spare sheets as he may still have accidents. Talk with your partner about budgeting for the extra costs having his son will incur so you can find ways to stretch your money. It is far more expensive than you imagine. You have the opportunity to build a great relationship with your partner's so. but remember it is your partner's responsibility first and foremost so he needs to step up and share the duties. If his son has had a difficult time he will need extra care and attention so ask for support from SS if needed.

Original poster

User9797 · 09/03/2019 13:34

Thanks for the reply piglet. Yeah it's hard for me I'm only 21 and don't have kids myself or any younger siblings or siblings at all so I'm oblivious. Ive only been with my partner 3 months nearly 4 and moved in straight away so it was all dumped on me and it's really stressful. I do so much more than he does, cooking cleaning looking after the kids etc so it's really hard for me. I don't work currently so my money is used to buy food for the week and his money is paying off all the debts and he wouldn't expect me to spend my money on his kids as I'm new to the relationship etc. I will talk with him and explain it's normal because he didn't understand that either

OP posts:

Haypanky · 09/03/2019 13:34

I lift my 4.5yo every night when I go up to bed and put her on the toilet for a wee. Sometimes she doesn't even wake!

AuntMarch · 09/03/2019 13:38

Neglected by his mum and then his dad thinks it's reasonable to move a new girlfriend straight in? I am surprised he isn't wetting more often with how unsettling that must be. No offence to you but that's a poor parenting decision from your partner!

SoyDora · 09/03/2019 13:55

Why did you move in straight away?

Original poster

User9797 · 09/03/2019 14:28

They haven't been with their mum for over a year. The eldest hates her and the youngest never asks about her. They both love me and treat me like I'm their mum. I moved straight in because I've known my partner 7 years and I was going to be homeless

OP posts:

Original poster

User9797 · 09/03/2019 14:29

And their behaviour has gotten so much better since I've moved in. They're so much happier now they just needed a mum figure

OP posts:

AuntMarch · 09/03/2019 15:03

Woahhhhh three months in and you are seeing yourself as mum figure, and they do too.... Major alarm bells. And not about the bed wetting.
Also as unfortunate as your situation before sounds, NOT the reason to move in with someone who should be prioritising their children. At least one of you should have thought about them.

AuntMarch · 09/03/2019 15:04

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Original poster

User9797 · 09/03/2019 15:37

Deleting this post now because everyone's so Nancy negative 😴😴

OP posts:

Original poster

User9797 · 09/03/2019 15:38

Well when I find out how to delete, I'm new to this

OP posts:

mrsoutnumbered · 09/03/2019 16:02

Don't worry. My son is 7 next month and still pees in the night, I'd say 3-4 times a week! He wears pull ups, I agree they are expensive so I just reuse the same one for 2/3 nights if he stays dry.

I haven't taken him to the doctor yet, but probably will if it doesn't stop soon.

I have also got Brolly Sheets on all my kids beds, they are well worth it.

MrsG010814 · 09/03/2019 16:23

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

SoyDora · 09/03/2019 16:27

You can’t delete a post.
It’s not negativity, it’s realism. These are real children’s lives.

Piglet208 · 09/03/2019 16:30

OP I'm sorry you feel judged when you came here to ask for advice. You don't have to justify yourself. It sounds to me like you are really trying your best and you have made a difference. If you are committed to your partner and his kids then this could be the the best thing for them. Just make sure their dad does his share of the work as well as the caring. He should not take advantage of you. Work as a team and learn together.

Rrxox · 09/03/2019 16:40

On the note of nappies being too expensive what about a cloth alternative? You just bomb them in the wash like pants so it might be a little more expensive at the start buying two for example you’d never need to buy more, hand wash n on the line each day they’d be dry by the next night kind of thing?

And a silly question when you say the sheets are ruined you’re not throwing them out are you my dp would hes super squeamish

Even a towel under the sheet will help save the mattress a bit.

Confusedbeetle · 09/03/2019 16:55

Its absolutely normal. Use a mattress protector and don't hassle the child . Up to 9 is not unusual

grinningcheshirecat · 09/03/2019 17:01

Maybe you could read a parenting book or two? It is a bit much to suddenly have to take care of two kids, most people prepare themselves since pregnancy and settle into it more organically.

grinningcheshirecat · 09/03/2019 17:02

I also second a matras protector and I would go for having at least 3 sheets (one on the bed, one in the wash and one spare for accidents)

grinningcheshirecat · 09/03/2019 17:03

Children do need a lot of stuff but they don't care about the costs. Aldi has cheap nappies which are quite good. Primark has lots of stuff and so does ikea if you need a new matras or cushion or something like that.

grinningcheshirecat · 09/03/2019 17:06

I know you feel judged but keep in mind that actually their dad should have told you this. It's not your fault that things aren't going as usual at the moment. It is commendable that you are trying your best and looking for advice.

BusterGonad · 09/03/2019 17:25

A lot of alarm bells going off for me!!!
Giving the benefit of the doubt here's my experience, my son wet the bed until he was about 8, (10 now and wets the bed every 6 months) we had a mattress protector and I bought Sainsburys basic nappys for bed time, about £2/3 for about 20, reuse if they are dry, the pound shop used to have, and hopefully still does, squares of absorbent sheets which you'd use for puppy training or to lay a baby on for nappy off times (if baby had nappy rash etc) put them under the sheet so they don't move about when child rolls over in sleep etc and for gods sake let the boy have a sheet or at least a towel. It sounds like he's had a shit life so please allow him some comfort at bed time.

Flip

1 2 3

Swipe left for the next trending thread