How to begin

[girlsgirls20]

My daughter will be 3 in May and we have been trying to potty train her. She has a speech delay so can't tell us when she needs to go. Initially we started sitting her on the potty throughout the day and when she went in it we heaped on the praise so she knew she was doing what she should be. This worked for a while but she doesn't do anything at all now. In fact, she's going backwards, she used to stand for nappy changes and getting dressed and she used to help but now as soon as she sees the stuff she lays down and insists I change her like a baby and refuses to go near the potty (worth noting that we have a 5 month old as well so she could be copying). Any advice on potty training a child who doesn't communicate would be greatly appreciated!

It sounds like she is not ready just yet. My youngest has a language delay too and when I first tried to potty train at 3 he wasn’t ready either. This is what worked for us:

I put him back in nappies, but would change him standing up next to the toilet (at home and public loos). I emptied any poo into the toilet, and told him this is where it needs to go. I encouraged him to help me flush the toilet and then we would wash hands, new nappy on etc. I didn’t sit him on the toilet to make sure there were zero demands. It was more about getting him used to what he would need to do when he was ready.

I kept doing this until he showed clear signs of being ready to train (in DS’s case he started not wanting to wear his nappy and taking it off as soon as he had peed!). It did take months though - just to warn you. Then we started with him being bare bottomed round the house, regular trips to the toilet etc. I also skipped the potty and went straight to the toilet.

DS’s language is still limited. At times he tells me he needs the toilet or he just leads me there! I did worry because of his communication issues, but once he was ready it all clicked fairly quickly.