Can't help feeling cross with my daughter when potty training!

[EvieandHenrysmummy]

Hi everyone! I'm feeling really frustrated right now and feel like an absolute failure as a mum!
My daughter is 2yrs and 3months: she knows when she needs a poo as she runs away and poos in her nappy. She has never told me that she needs to wee. But this is our 4th attempt at potty training since April and she always ends up back in nappies.
She will sit on toilet/potty but then cries and gets off. We've never had a wee on either she just wees on the carpet and then wants her pants changed. She ends up constipated cos she holds poo in rather than go on potty or toilet.
She is a very tall girl and looks a lot older than 2 so I constantly feel judged because she is in nappies! Help!! Xx

do you have a garden? my DD has always been much more engaged and happy to flag when she needs a wee if she gets to wee on the grass :)

we trained her with chocolate buttons for every wee/poo. she is a chocolate fiend though

Ignore the judgers and forget about training for a while.

Honestly, it's so much easier when they are ready. DD was like your daughter at 2 and I think we could have got there. But because of moving house, childminder etc we left it until she was 2.6 and it worked like a dream - she got it straight away. (DS was another story but hey!)

Don't feel pressured by other people. Leave it a while and perhaps try with a pants-buying expedition etc in a month or so?

Agree, sounds like she's not quite ready. Take the pressure off and put the pants and potty away for a while.

She's still quite young and it does sound like she's not ready. And honestly getting frustrated is not going to help either of you. She's not doing it to spite you.
Take the pressure off and try again in a few months.

You might feel people are judging but they probably aren't.
I am a mother of tall children and know the feeling that people might wonder why is that 4 yo in a nappy/buggy/using a dummy when you know they are only 2. I always buy my children lots of I am 1/2/3 tops!

As for the potty training I would just wait a while. My older 2 were both dry within a week at 2.9 although I did try them before they just weren't ready so I left it.
DS2 is 2.7 and I have tried him a few times, he isn't ready and is quite scared of the potty so I've put it away for now.
My SIL keeps telling me her DS was trained at 23 months but in fact he wasn't properly dry until he was 2.8!
I think that's what happens with a lot of people, they might ditch the nappies early but there children are not really dry for months.

their !

Hi. My DD is only a month off 3 years old now. She has only just moved out of day-nappies (within the last 2-3 weeks). Not many accidents so far at all. She is going straight to the big loo + child-sized lid- she hates the potty so we don't bother with that.

We also bribe with daily/ visit-by-visit re-negotiated rates of smarties and gummibears. After a month or two when she's really got the hang of it this will probably move to stickers.

I agree that you need to go back to nappies and wait another month or two and certainly not worry about it. It's not worth the trouble.

Thank-you all for all of your kind words and encouragement :-).
I really want to put it all away and not even talk about it for a while but my husband is of a completely different mind set. He thinks we need to just decide to do it and go for it so she doesn't get mixed signals! I've tried this before for a whole week but all she wants to do is wear "big girl pants" and wee on the carpet!
I think if she was trying to go on the potty/toilet I wouldn't get cross if she did have an accident but she doesn't even try!
She is only 2 so I know I have to be patient but its hard when you get people questioning you all the time and the fact she is over 3ft tall doesn't help at all!
I just want to get a t-shirt for her that says "I'm only 2 so leave me and my mummy alone!"
It's not so much people looking at us and judging us; it's family and friends buying her knickers for her as presents, I just take it as a criticism!

iamsoi - you keep bumping and responding to these potty training threads to promote your Phone App but I believe mumsnet has a policy on advertising so I have reported your posts.