DS 2.11, speech delay... any advice?

[fuzzpig]

As both of us have been at home (due to illness/injury, so barely been going out at all) we decided to try potty training our DS, who is nearly 3. He was recently assessed as having the speech of a 20mo (so about 14 month delay), hearing is fine though.

He just sneaks in to nursery this year so will be one of the youngest and although I know they can't discriminate, they are putting the pressure on WRT being trained on starting next month.

Amazingly he has started using the potty quite quickly (with a sweet/chocolate every time...) and is sitting down unprompted when he needs to go, but he is refusing clothes! He did like the pants we got him ages ago but now he shouts if I suggest them :(

So he's running around naked which is fine, and we aren't going out anyway as we are not well enough, but what do I do when it's time to go out to town or something? I don't think he's ready to hold it for a long time while getting to a toilet but it is really hard to tell as he's not talking. It was different with DD, she wasn't trained until 3.1 but then she was able to tell me/nursery staff etc and understand things like "try before we go as there is no toilet until we get to town" etc.

Any advice? (sorry it was long)

Hi Fuzzpig

Not sure how much use I can be but didn't want your post to go unanswered.

One thing that springs to mind is... do you definitely want your DS to start nursery in September? Is there is a posssibility of starting in January or going to a preschool (or other nursery) where they are not worried about children in nappies.

Indeed, do you feel he is ready for nursery? How are they planning to adapt what they do (where necessary) because of his speech delay. I think most guides to potty training suggest that a certain level of understanding of speech and spoken language is advisable before you start potty training (though I am certainly not an expert on this). If this is so, maybe potty training is going to be too much for him (though he obviously has got off to a good start) and a good nursery ought to be able to adapt to a child's individual needs. It's not just that they can't discriminate, but also that they need to show real willing to work with what your DS needs/can do rather than just grudgingly accept IYSWIM?

Sorry if this seems to be opening issues which you have already decided you are happy with. I'm sure there must be people on Mumsnet who have experience of potty training and speech delay and who can advise you better than me.

If you are pressing ahead, then one thing to bear in mind is that your DS might change his mind about clothes pretty quickly. Could it be that he doesn't want clothes because he knows it will be slower for him to get to the potty, he might need help getting things off. And once he gets more confident, the worry about clothes could fall away - especially if he learns to wee standing up and if he has loose , elasticated joggers or shorts which are easy to get up and down.

Hope some of this is helpful, and others come along who can add more. Good luck!