I really need help

[Shez1981]

I am trying to train my 2 and 1/2 year old son so far things have not gone well he screams when i take him to the bathroom and will no sit on the potty or the loo, when he is in pants he just wees on the floor and is not bothered by it, if he is in pull ups he will hold it (i know he is doing this beacuse he holds his bits and jiggels) untill i have to leave him to something different. My little girl was so easy she was dry within 3 day just after her 2nd birthday, i really need some help as my local paygroup will not take him untill he is dry and iv ran out of ideas.
We love it if anyone has any ideas.

Take the potty out of the bathroom? Put it in the room he's playing in and suggest he might like to sit on it. But ultimately he is little and I would not like my child to go somewhere that can't cope with a toddler in nappies or a bit of baby wee

Tbh it just sounds lie he's not ready

If you are in the UK then your local playgroup cannot refuse to take a child in nappies. OFSTED insist that contindence should not be a barrier to attending pre school.

There is no point in comparing your children as every child is different. Siblings often develop at different rates in all areas of development. I think that pushing a child into toilet training can be counter productive. There are lots of approaches to potty training and different approaches work with different children.

I suggest that you concentrate on just getting him to sit on the potty or toilet. Don't worry about whether he actually produces anything. Its vital that sitting on the potty is made a pleasent experience. It is a mistake to allow potty training to become a battle of wills. When parents become angry then the child will start to dread the potty.

For example if he wants to watch a video then ask him to sit on the potty while watching the video.

Or alternatively have him in the garden playing naked and the potty close by.

Some children get really annoyed with constantly being asked to sit on the potty. It may well work better for him to let him decide when to sit on the potty. Ie. have an afternoon outside and him bare bottomed. If he wees on the grass then tell CALMLY him that poo poo and wee wee go in the potty. It is really tough as a parent, but you have to let him have accidents inorder to learn.

If your son shows that he has bladder/ bowel control when bare bottomed then the next step is to move to pants. Tell him that every time he does a poo or wee in the potty he will get a sweet. However you need to wait for him to ask for the potty and again not nag or tell him to sit on the potty. When he has accidents in his pants then you need to tell him "If you do a poo or a wee in the potty you will get a sweet". Just calmly change his clothes and not tell him off.