Advice on using star charts for 3 yr old boy please

[ilovemyoboe]

My 3 yr 2month old boy is FINALLY showing an interest in using the toilet (occasionally the potty), and after months of nothing, we had a wee on the toilet yesterday (much celebrating and calling of relatives!). Think the interest is mostly motivated by chocolate buttons (one for a wee, two for a poo) but hey, if it works ...

Think we need to come up with a 'star chart' plan to encourage longer term use of potty/toilet now, as we only have nappy-off time at certain times of the day when we're in atm. Not really sure how to structure it though. I've got stores of little toys, larger toys, and bits of Brio track and trains saved up as rewards (charity shops/car boot sales are great!). Was going to give one star for a wee or a poo, maybe a bigger star for a poo if I can find some. What i'm not sure about is how to structure the stars vs. rewards. E.g. how many stars gets a reward? Do I do say three in a day gets a bit of track? Not sure whether to reward wearing pants as he's very anti-pants atm. Maybe should just delay that. I don't want to reward too much, and then have trouble weaning him off the rewards, but also he really needs some motivation for potty training, as he just doesn't care otherwise, so don't want him to lose interest. Have a bit of a deadline with baby 2 arriving in mid-Nov, so am keen to keep the momentum up. Can't just wait for him any longer.

So, would really appreciate any advice on this, and stories of how star charts have/haven't worked with similar aged boys.

Thank you!

ps. Does anywhere sell car/train/bus/digger stickers cheaply?

My DS was a stubborn little one and I had to use all manner of tricks...And he never went for stickers! What finally work was marbles and a little shot glass - everytime he did a wee one marble and a poo 2 marbles. He loved taking the marble out of the bag and popping it in the glass. If it was full at the end of the day he got a "reward". To keep his interest (and to save money/overloading with too many toys) the rewards were to get a "reward stick" - In essence I pinched a few of the wooden coffee stirrers from the gym and wrote various things on them like:
A piggy back round the house
A dance with mummy
A story
Something from the sweetie jar
etc, etc
Some cost money. Lots cost a little bit of time.
Oh and I just remembered his interest started to flag in wearing pants after a couple of hours and so I resorted to totally "bigging up" any success - and in the heat of the moment I made him do a celebratory "dry pant dance" each time he had a wee on the loo and his pants were dry...him and me holding hands dancing in a circle singing "Dry Pant Dance, Dry Pant Dance, Dry Pant Da-a-ance". Oh the humiliation when caught doing this by my FIL. Or when he wanted to do it in the supermarket. Had to keep going for some weeks with this one!

DD when we did her was a lot less stubborn...and was in a jigsaw phase at the time - so each time she had a success she got given a piece of a 30 piece Paddington Bear puzzle - so keen to keep dry to finish the puzzle.

Sorry such a long reply - bought back memories Sounds like you are on the right track. Though tbh I was "lazy" with mine and they both said they wanted to wear pants before I did it. DD was 2y4 months and DS 3y6 months. With both had a few accidents the first day and then since then been brilliant. There is actually a lot to be said for letting then dictate the pants thing. And for having your first still in nappies when second comes along (no need to feed baby and deal with "Ineedawee Mummy" at the same time

Good luck with potties and for impending new arrival

Thank you very much for your reply FishFingers . (Sorry my response has been so slow; can't really get the time to use the laptop during the day, and been flagging by the evening so kept putting it off until I felt more able to string some words together!)

Love the marble idea, and the reward sticks - that was very creative of you :-) Such a good way to not get too many actual toys, as it could get out of hand! Contemplating whether to introduce a star chart/marble jar as a way of encouraging other positive behaviour too (feeding, dressing etc.) to encourage him to be a little more independent, and reward good behaviour. The 'naughty corner' doesn't seem to work so well any more, so losing a marble might be a very good threat!

Will try to remember to post back what I tried and how it went.