Anyone doing EC?

[CheshireDing]

I just wanted some advice really. I started DD on the potty around January but more recently she has a re-usable nappy because the theory is that if she is wet (rather than a disposal which keeps the moisture away) that she will ONLY wee in the potty and not in her nappy and/or the potty.

It doesn't seem to be working though, she doesn't seem to care if she is wet and if her jeans are wet.

Is she just a scruffy mare and a lost cause for the time being EC-wise?

How old is she?

What's EC?

Not all babies care whether they are wet, or even realise when they are doing a wee. I think the feeling of being wet and knowing when they are weeing increases when they are toddlers. However it does increase the potty confidence as it has already become a part of their daily routine, they are not afraid of the sensation of something 'dropping away' from them, and don't freak out at the sight of what they have produced, all common problems with DC who have been in nappies exclusively and are resistant to potty training as older toddlers. For this alone, whether you get anything in the potty or not it is worth keeping going.

With a baby, you pop them on the potty at nappy change time and either they do something or they don't. You can maximise the chances if you know your DD has a regular poo time, or on waking from a sleep sit her on the potty then. It's no big deal if she wears nappies as well. They do refuse to sit on the potty at times, often when learning to crawl or walk is more exciting I gather, but they often go back to it.

This is not potty training as such, more about offering an alternative place to wee and poo. Even DC who have done this from birth still train and leave nappies behind at 2yo and over.

I think you are expecting too much at the moment, and the age of your DD is quite important.

I have offering DD (now 2) potty pretty much since birth. Since she was about 6 months she very very very rarely poos in her nappy (has always been in resuables). She shows very little/no awareness of wees and will quite happily wee in nappies/training pants and not notice (she also rarely wees in the toilet)

Theres an EC book called "Diaper Free Baby' which is quite good, tells you what to do depending on what age DC is when s/he starts, and depending on how much effort you want to put in.

What is the advantage of EC? Doesn't it just create more stress all round?

It shouldn't create more stress if you accept a child won't always do something in the potty, and will then use the clean nappy you've put on them just minutes later. Ithinkitsgoingtobefines DD has obviously chosen to use her potty for poos, because she was offered the option and she feels more comfortable than sitting in a dirty nappy. If you have unrealistic expectations and get stressed about it yourself then yes. In this it's no different to conventional potty training where people get upset about accidents and convey this to the child. If every response to a used potty is positive and the reaction to an empty one is completely neutral, there would be no stress.

Doing EC without nappies would be a whole different thing though.

There is a school of thought that if you allow a child to use nappies all the time and then suddenly insist they use a potty, there will be problems because they have been conditioned to use the nappies and there is a battle to get them trained and to give them up. Popping a baby on a potty for a couple of minutes at every nappy change seems like the easier option to me.

She is 9.5 months old now. She pretty much always do her 2 poos a day on the potty because I know one is first thing and the other after her dinner before bedtime.

She will often do a wee on the potty but then also not be too fussed about doing it in her nappy (or on the carpet if nappy free!).

I don't stress about doing EC and I know if she doesn't need to "go" she just arches her back so I take her straight off the potty. It's just because I suppose I expected her to care she was wet once I started using the cloth nappies.

It makes sense what has been said though about continuing so that she is not scared of the "dropping away" sensation and seeing what's in the potty so on the basis I will carry on. I just wondered if I was doing something wrong but I guess she is just a scruff-bag and not bothered if she is wet

She starts nursery in September and I have been wondering whether to send her in disposables or the cloth nappies and whether nursery will think I am mad asking for her to be put on the potty and whether they will get naffed off changing her more often because she is in cloth nappies.

Nimpy it's Elimination Communication - the baby giving off signals that they need to use the potty.

Apparently in first world countries we bf for a short amount of time but keep them in nappy for a long time, but in 3rd world countries they bf for a long time but are usually dry within 12 months. That's what I read anyway

She sounds as though she's doing well Cheshire. At her age she won't have any concerns about your carpet! It is a good idea to let her know that using her nappy isn't wrong, even with older babies who can sign the word potty or toilet, it may not be possible to stop in a hurry if in the car for example, to let them use it. I suspect that a lot of cues can be missed unless we carry our babies about all the time in slings and shawls attached to us, as in the 3rd world.

I think you need to have a word with the nursery about the potty and cloth nappies. You may need to use disposables there, or you could invest in pocket style nappies which are more like a disposable to change. If they know she arches her back if she doesn't need to go, it won't take them any longer than just the nappy change.

Why would it add to stress? I'm putting DD2 on potty OP (6 months). I've been encouraging her to poo alfresco from birth (after awful experience with first one hating nappy on and withholding). I've also started to try and wee-catch, its more about me working out rhythms than reading any signs though (although if I hear a fart its action stations). We do wee wee sounds at nappy change and sing songs . My motivation with wees is nappy rash unfortunately!

My DD has always been in cloth nappies and has no problems with them being wet. I don't think they're particularly uncomfortable. Her nursery happily change them for us. I think you may be labouring under a misapprehension that cloth bummed babies feel bothered by wet nappies!

I am not sure how many of the respondees here have practiced EC or read about it. YOu may find the closed EC groups on facebook where EC families share info a good place to look. The Diaper Free Baby book also might help. I AM AN OCCASIONAL ec AS i STARTED LATE AND FRANKLY DON'T WANT TO WOORRY AT NIGHT/OUT ETC (oopS CAPSlock). I thinkthat at 5 months he was already conditioned to nappy and moving to cloth/reusable as you have would not have helped. I have realised that he hasno really obvious cues and with weaning his patterns have changed too. Had I started at birth it may have been different but I didnt know aboutit then. I do sit him onthe potty several times a day and he generally pees soon after which I think is a success. Poos are a different story!

Yes I did think she would be bothered by a wet nappy! Never mind though, as long as I know others don't care it's okay :)

I will have a look a that book thanks.

Thank you for everyone's comments, we will persevere and try and keep poo off the carpet!