Confused. Should I start potty training? 2.6 years (on lactulose)

[Swimminglikeaduck]

My 2.6 dd is my pfb, so I havent a clue!

We have a potty in each room and occassionally she has done a wee in one and got a big cheer and a sweetie.

in the last two days when in the house with no clothes/ nappy on her bottom half she

1. asked for the potty and promptly weed
2. when I was out of the room she unexpectantly brought a potty full of wee to me and exclaimed "I did a wee wee!" So -realised the need for a wee, found potty, did the deed, brought it to me for praise.

Im thinking -this is it, she understands.

But -she has never pooed anywhere but her nappy. She is on lactulose twice a day as is otherwise constipated. There have never been regular times to poo -sometimes 3 times in one day, sometimes no poo for 4 days (average I would say is 2 days).

Im worried that the urge to poo is possibly more immediate or maybe even that the little grunts and groans that its coming take ages and it wouldnt be appropriate to sit on the potty for such a long time (hours).

I was told by a HV (a few months ago) that pooing is probably a stressful event for her and advised me to avoid linking that stressful event to a potty.

Feel like I should try, but dont want to scupper our chances and give her a fear of pooing.

Can anyone offer any advice??

I think you could still train for wees, otherwise she might get the impression that her successes on the potty aren't important and that you'd rather she used a nappy. It's possible that the grunts and groans might actually be DD trying to stop herself pooing, which is why it takes so long.

However, a lot of DC are reliable for wees and still use a nappy to poo, they ask for one when they need it. Could you increase the Lactulose slightly? Other things to try to help get more frequent and regular poos are increase her drinks, dietary fibre, and exercise, because the working of the abdominal muscles increases the speed of her gut peristalsis and so poo is softer to pass.

HV is right not to frighten her by making her poo on the potty at this stage, but when you find the constipation is under control and it doesn't hurt to poo you could suggest she sit on the potty with a nappy on to do it, then gradually progress in stages to sitting with a nappy loosely on, then just lining the potty, to just a pad of loo paper as DD becomes more confident. You can cut a hole in the nappy so that the poo goes through it into the potty, but there is still that feeling of security. Buy cheap value nappies for this.

You can do the nappy thing on a childs toilet seat too, make sure she has a high footstool so that she is sitting with her knees higher than her hips which is the most efficient position in which to empty the bowel, as in squatting. Progressing to the loo might take some months.

Girlyworly- thankyou so much for detailed reply, you've given me some confidence to gve it a go. we've a funeral this week and she'll be looked after by someone else so I'll start the day after that.
She has lots of exercise, likes fruit but seems to only have a sip or two of water rather than have a good long drink (I always seem todo this too, must make more of an effort at modelling drinking). I keep buying new novelty toddler sippy cups which work for a day or two, but Im wondering about scrapping sippy cups altogether and just using regular cups in the hope its easier to drink more.
I'll see what happens with the poo, but its a good idea to ask her if she wants to do the poo in a nappy - shes very independent and likes to be given a choice.
And thanks for the cheap nappy tip - truly hadnt thought of that
Thanks again