Night wetting and school nurse moan!

[Smokedsalmonbagel]

We recently had a questionnaire from the school nurse about our childs health. There was a question on night wetting. I ticked he is wet at night but wrote I don't see it as a major problem.

We have tried to get him dry at night but haven't had much success. I've done a bit of reading around the hormone that is meant to kick in and read night wetting isn't really a problem until they hit 6 or 7. So although I've been a bit worried I had a view that it wasn't a major problem.

Anyway this morning I have had a letter from the school nurse with a suggested programme to follow. It states if he is still wet by the time he is 5 we should contact them. There was also a booklet trying to sell associated potty/night time training stuff.

I'm a bit annoyed about them identifying it as a problem whereas the research suggests it isn't yet. I feel it has put more pressure on me to get him out of pull ups. There is also information to give to him to help him get dry. Maybe I'm taking too personally and should just see it as a general letter they send out.

Any thoughts on whether I should be trying harder. I feel like contacting the school nurses and asking them on their evidence that he should be dry before 5.

Any advice on getting him dry. A few nights ago he went to bed at 8. I checked him at 11 and he was wet!!! He hadn't noticed! He is 5 in April.

Thanks.

My DS was always soaking before we went to bed too. We just couldn't get him dry and he was in the largest nappies we could buy because he out-weed pull-ups!

Just before he was 7 when I was expecting his brother I decided enough was enough. Had a big moan about having a baby AND a big boy in nappies, and bought a hypnotherapy CD by Linda Hudson on the advice of a hypnotherapist friend.

He was dry within 3 nights! It may not have been the CD but seeing as there had been 4 years between him being dry during the day but wet at night, it seems more than a coincidence.

FWIW - my (good) HV had told me they didn't deem it a problem until they were over 7 so I ignored the school nurse information.

changer22 tell me more about the cd? do you play it when they go to sleep?

my 9 year old is still wetting. She is seen by an enuerisis clinic, we've done all the recommended charts/ used the alarm etc. no real change. Except i think that the volume of wee is less now than it used to be.

I'd love to help her as she is getting more and more sleepover invites which she has to turn down, i'm just not sure what to do?

Poor your DD - that must be hard.

Yes, you put the CD on at bedtime and just put it on repeat. It's all very calming. The speaker - Lynda Hudson - talks gently that your bladder is empty and you don't need to do a wee and it's all very relaxing.

I've just googled her and it's 'Lynda' with a 'y'.

Great thank u. I'm willing to give anything a try!

Research now suggests that if a child is still wet at night at 5 they are likely to need some input to help them achieve nighttime dryness.

However due to limitations of resources most enuresis clinics won't see children before 7 and have long waiting lists, hence the relatively new practice of offering the parents some support before that age with the aim of promoting night time dryness. It may not be possible that the child is dry at 5 but the idea is that you start the process.

Yes, hormone production is a factor but also improving bladder tone by regular filling and emptying, as well as increasing arousability when wet (by removing pull-ups) can help.

Sidge do u have much experience with this?

My ds stopped wearing nappies at night around the age of 3 for at least 6 mths she was dry never needing to get up in the night to wee. Then she started wetting and has done so for 6 years! She doesn't drink as much as her siblings no matter how much I try. She never gets up in the night just sleeps wet. I think its getting less volume as her duvet is not always wet now.
She has always suffered with ent problems and I've read some research showing a link.

My DS1 is nearly 6 and soaking wet nappy every morning, he would like to be dry but he has no control. I don't see it as a big issue, am more concerned with daytime wetting (he has irritable bladder) although this has got much better since he started taking oxybutinin.

re: sleepovers, he goes with the pull-up. I guess different for 9 year old girl. The doctor we saw suggested trying the medication saying could be used occasionally eg for sleepovers.

Am interested in the CD, he would like that - he is not keen on bedwetting alarm and I am not keen on the medication. Might wait until daytime is under control though.... but am interested to hear if anyone else has success with it.

Hattie11 I have a bit of experience (I used to be a SN and ran enuresis clinics).

It sounds like your DD may have a lack of arousability as she can sleep in a wet bed, and her full bladder isn't waking her. This can be due to a weak flabby bladder and if she doesn't drink much it's unlikely to become strong and toned. The bladder is a muscle, and like any muscle needs a workout to become strong. To work out the bladder it needs regular filling and emptying, ideally 250mls of fluid every 2-3 hours and then toileting every few hours.

A strong toned bladder sends a stronger message to the sleeping brain when full, and prompts the child to wake. Of course they then need to act on the full bladder and some children will ignore it!

Alarms can be useful in older children as they wake the child as soon as the bed is wet but ideally need to be used following consultation with someone at an enuresis clinic, so that a plan can be made. Alarms also need to follow bladder training.

foreverondiet I think achieving night time dryness when there is daytime wetting due to bladder instability is difficult, so I wouldn't get too worried about it. But I imagine giving the CD a try certainly wouldn't hurt!

Thanks everyone for comments.

Thanks Sidge.That is interesting. I had no idea about them starting input from 5 and it makes the nurses letter make much more sense.

My DS isn't a great drinker. I need to keep reminding him. Now he is at school he is even worse and often comes home with a nearly full water bottle. This is something we need to work on.

He seems to lack arousability and doesn't wake to wee or when wet.

I think I will try first to get him drinking more. I'm not ready for leaving his night time pull ups yet. I think it might be something to tackle in the summer holidays. Where there is no pressure to get up in the morning and warm weather to wash and dry the sheets.

Final question if you come back - is it advisable to toilet him when I go up to bed? He really hates me waking him. Is it best to leave his bladder to fill?

I would establish a good routine of drinking and toileting for now, and then try going without the pullups when the weather is better! Avoid red and brown drinks before bedtime as these can irritate the bladder in some children.

At bedtime get him to do the 3Ts - toilet, teeth, then very last thing before going to sleep, toilet. This double emptying makes sure the bladder is completly emptied.

Regarding toileting when you go to bed - that's a tricky one. Lots of parents 'lift' their child late on when they go to bed and it can achieve a dry bed. However if the child isn't 100% awake then all you are doing is perpetuating the 'wee whilst asleep' message to the brain so it doesn't really help to promote night time dryness.

If you do toilet him then, make sure he's awake and can walk himself to the loo. But this can make the child more sleepy and so less likely to wake themselves later on in the night.

Thanks that is great advice!

He doesn't see night time wetting as a problem, which in some ways is good but he is really not bothered about becoming dry.

I will start by encouraging the drinking for now.

Thanks Sidge. My ds has been seen by clinic for 2 years and we have done the alarm etc. I think you're right I'm going to persevere with drinking.

Dd bf constantly thru the night until 2 and then had milk in bottles thru the night til at least 3. I often wonder if there's a link to this. As her bladder would never of had long periods of emptiness. Does anyone else think the same for their children who still wet?