Decided to try big boy pants today on a whim... 10 changes later...

[BearWith]

..I'm kind of regretting it.

DS will be 4 in late August, so almost 3 and a half now. I've been stressing about him not being toilet trained, and feel like surely he must be ready to start. He currently has a wee on the toilet first and last thing when I sit him on there.

He has wet himself so much this afternoon and evening that I've lost count. he seems to wee about every 15-30 minutes. No warning he is about to, he just does it. Is this normal, or a sign he is not ready?

He'll have to go to his Dad's tomorrow in a nappy as his dad has no clothes for him there , he only goes three days a week and no nights. But that's another story.

I feel really stressed and like I've bungled it now, want to put him in a nappy and relax but that's just about me really isn't it?

It doesn't matter .

Can you try again next weekend? If it goes pear shaped again then leave it for a couple of weeks. FWIW I didn't put my dc's in pants until they'd nearly cracked it in pull ups. They both ended up being potty trained at about 3.6.

You could try some bribery next time to get him to use the loo. Is he ok with using the toilet / potty?

seems a lot of wee

No, it's not just about you, I don't blame you for wanting to relax.
What got DS sorted in the end was when I gave up and just asked him to sit on pampers changing mats to watch TV - that way if he weed it wouldn't go everywhere. He then started aiming for the mats which I decided was progress then we had a couple of non starters with the potty, then cracked it with the toilet.
Currently training DD and just taking it slowly. Bad thing about your situation is you're presumably feeling the pressure for school which, because of the way birthdays are, wasn't an issue with DS and definitely won't be with DD.

Thanks, I feel a bit calmer now :) Probably going to home educate, so the late summer birthday isn't an issue luckily. I do still feel under pressure from people who sense my reluctance to train him and assume he'd have been potty trained at 2 if it wasn't for me...

I heard on MN that pull ups are the devils work so I've been avoiding them. However, after today I'm sorely tempted!! The problem is DS never complains if he has a wet nappy, he doesn't care/notice. I've trained him to tell me if he's pooed in it but even that took a while. He doesn't seem that conscious of the sensations. We did away with potties because he didn't seem to like them and he now sits happily on a trainer seat on the big toilet. Mostly I have to tell him to sit on it, he'll very rarely as to without prompting. Ho hum.

oh yes those children who are trained at two, but somehow need asking every 10 minutes until they're 4

BTW I know children are trained at 2, a friend's DD was (not 'trained',the DD just seemed to do it) but others who did train from just before 2 seem to always be having accidents.

Don't worry about it, it will happen eventually.

My ds had issues with constipation so not a great example but we are just about beyond accidents now at 5. His friend at school is 4 and a half, he only really stopped having accidents once he started school, before that he just didn't really care all that much so although he was technically trained he didn't bother sometimes.

My dd decided she wanted to get out of nappies before she was 2 and started ripping them off mid wee or poo so I didn't get the choice! She has ended up being a pretty annnoyingly long slog as she (and she is 3 now) will have days when she just wees flipping everywhere and you have to revert back to "just trained" mode of sending her to the loo every hour for a few days to snap her back out of it .

I don't see anything wrong with prompting. Perhaps because of ds (who didn't get the sensations and has had to learn them the hard way). Mine will pretty much always say "no" if you ask them if they need a wee because they don't want to stop playing/think their sibling will steal their toy if they leave it to go to the loo so I go for the regimented system and I tell them to go after breakfast, before all meals, before we go out somewhere and so on which I figure is sensible and keeps things mostly accident free. Some kids just don't go of their own accord until later.

Thanks guys. DS's dad will be away for a few weeks in early Feb and I'm unsure whether to try again then and stay in a lot or whether DS is just not ready because of how frequently he pees with no warning, and if I should in fact shelve it for longer.