my DS1 is not interested in the potty or toilet. All the other children at nursery are toilet trained, but him. We have 2 different potties and steps attached to a seat that goes over the toilet, but refuses to use any. Ive physically got to hold him down with him kicking and screaming at me and he still doesn't do anything. I've read to him, sung to him, put his fave DVD on given him sweets etc but he just doesn't seem to care.
I'm not even sure he knows when he needs to go. He never seems to stop and concentrate on having a poo like DS2 does, and when I notice sometimes I can tell he's been sitting in it for a while (usually he is playing in bedroom and I don't smell it till he comes out). Yet when I go to change him he fights me and tries wriggling away and if I say to him 'you need your bum changed coz you've pooh-poohed' he'll just deny it.
DS2, who is 19 months is mire interested. He'll go and sit on the potty and when he gets up, usually he has done a pooh (he only sits on it if he is wearing a nappy though, won't go bear it else).
All my and DH families are always saying how DS1 should be potty trained by now coz 'all their kids were potty trained by 3', we tell them DS1 is not interested but they dont agree and say we should make him have no choice. I've told them every kid is different, but they go on and on and it makes me feel like I've failed my son. They go on about it to sn extent I dread going to see them coz I'm worried they will say more and I'll lose it with them.
We have tried leaving it for a few weeks, even hiding the potty, and then restarting but get the same reaction. I'm starting to worry if maybe he has a problem if just not knowing he needs to go. Or should I leave him and try with DS2 in the hope that DS1 will copy? Even if his friends come round and use the potty or toilet he isn't bothered, if he follows me to the toilet I say 'mummy's having a wee wee (or pooh pooh), do you Want to show me what a big boy you are and try to go wee we', he either just sits there and ignores me, says 'no' or runs off.
If I put him in pants he screams at me (always have to put pair over DS2 nappy as well to stop the tantrum), and usually I can distract him long enough to take his mind off screaming, but 5minutes later I find he's done something and is just happily playing as if he's not gone, when it's all dripping down his leg. He won't let me leave a nappy or pants off him completly.
Sorry it's so long, I'm at wits end have tried everything I can think of and he's no better than the day I started trying. Any help would be great.
Thank you