Toilet trained but pooing in pants this week

[Lozza70]

I hope someone can help. DS made the big move to pants 4 weeks ago and has been really good, very few accidents and completely dry at night. We did wait until he turned 3 so it was quite quick but this week and this weekend in particular it has been a nightmare. He seems to be withholding all day, even though he is going for wee's during the day. Then complaining of a sore tummy all afternoon with frequent trips to the toilet, 12 times this afternoon!!, before doing a poo in his pants. During all the frequent trips to the toilet he hops on and then jumps off almost immediately and nothing we do can persuade him to wait. I don't want to force him and hold him on the toilet as I think it could make things worse. Anyone else had similar problems and has any advice?

Sometimes they get bored with the whole thing, especially as it interferes with their game/DVD and so on.

Witholding as you describe might be due to a fear he has developed of pooing, possibly because he might have had a bit of constipation through not going to the loo when he needed to, and passing the poo hurt. If this is the case, he will not be keen to poo again in case it hurts, and going in his pants could be because he just couldn't hold on any longer. He might actually have an anal fissure (tear) which is painful when he poos, so up the high fibre food, plenty of drinks, and possibly stool softening medication.

I think things will get better when he realises it no longer hurts.

Pooing is often much harder than weeing - they can be scared by poo as they've never really seen it before, this leads to them witholding, which then leads to constipation and more fear. Ah, the dreaded cycle.

Would he respond to a reward chart? Seems to be quite useful for a lot of TT 'issues'...

Good luck. :)

At 3, he is old enough to tell you why he doesn't want to poo in the toilet anymore. Have you tried asking him? Maybe talk to him about it when reading a little book about toilet training.

I've also heard about some children not liking the sensation of the poo falling away from their bodies (as they are used to it being next to their skin in their nappies). Some people recommend lining the potty with a nappy to create a similar effect until they get used to it. Worth a go?