'Lifting' at night

[lorelilee]

When do you know it's time to stop? We decided to go down this route on the advice of Dsis and slightly regret it - we should have stuck to our guns and waited till we had a few dry ones! However, we currently 'lift' him once at 10pm and have only had a couple of 'accidents'. Which is the way forward?

lorelilee I am bumping for you. I have a DS who is 5 and suddenly stopped wetting himself. So we thought 'goodbye night pants' and he was thrilled. But instead it has been 'hello wetting the bed'. Now we lift him at 11pm and then we avoid the problem but fear we are creating more trouble. So I'd love to know anyone else's experience.

Well, we were 'advised' by MIL to take DS to the loo when we went to bed, but we used to wake him fully and he had to walk to the loo himself so that he was completely aware of what he was doing. It didn't keep him dry every night in any case.

I think if you put children on the toilet still asleep, they just wee in their sleep, the very thing you're trying to avoid; so you might just as well leave them in a nappy. Also, some children don't take kindly to being woken and can't get back to sleep, resulting in grumpiness next morning. I did ask DS if he wanted us to wake him and he said yes, but he was good at getting back to sleep! With hindsight I wouldn't do it again.

Flagging, if you wake your DS before he goes to the loo at 11pm, he may become conditioned to waking at that time and taking himself to the loo, but if he wakes as he is wetting, it's not working.

Dryness at night is developmental, and when their bodies are ready, it will happen. A hormone is produced in the brain which slows kidney function, resulting in less, more concentrated urine. The eventually full bladder sends signals to the brain that it needs to empty, and this wakes the child so that they can get up and go to the loo. You can help improve the volume that the childs bladder can hold by making sure they drink lots during the day. Tail drinks off before bed, no fizzy or caffeinated ones or blackcurrant, which can over stimulate the kidneys in some DC.

Some people prefer to continue with absorbent night pants, some would rather change lots of wet beds, it depends on what is easier for the family in general. Night wetting is so usual before the age of 7 that healthcare professionals won't do anything about it.

Hope this helps you all.

thanks girly our DS happily wets himself and doesn't even wake. We've had night after night of soaking beds.

what girly said

We lifted DS2 for quite a while as he refused to wear a nappy or pull ups of any sort once he was dry in the day.
We lifted him before we went to bed around 11 and it seemed like we did it for years but I think it was probably only about 2-3 months. Eventually he just wasn't doing anything when we put him on the loo and he was still dry in the morning.

if you have a run of dry nappies in the morning then give it a go but you cannot 'train' for night time dryness, see girly's post above

Bestnameever personally I would not be taking her nappies off until they are dry in the morning. It is not like 'training' during the day as the child is not conscious of what they are doing and cannot control it (iyswim) - as girly has posted, it is completely developmental and when they are ready, they are ready and this could be anywhere up to the age of 7.

DS1 just suddenly started having dry pull-ups every morning when he was about 4.5 (about 6 months ago) so we stopped using them and he has not had one accident. We have never 'lifted' him either (and more often than not, I forget to remind him to go before he goes to bed . During this time, I also cannot remember him getting up in the middle of the night to go for a wee - he just doesn't seem to need it.

Like Girly says.
DS is 3.8 and is dry during the day, and dry some / most nights. But he still sometimes wees when he's asleep, so he still wears a pull-up for bed.
He'll be dry at night in his own good time, so I'm not worried about him still wearing a pull-up at night.

When his pull-up is wet in the morning I just tell him that his willy did a wee when he was asleep, but as he gets older his willy will wake him up when it needs to wee, and then he'll have dry pants every morning, just like mammy & daddy.

Thanks for the advice ladies. Really wish I hadn't listened to Sis!

Not your fault Lorelilee, I didn't know any better when DS was little, developmental readiness to be dry all night wasn't in any of the baby and toddler development books I read 20 odd yrs ago!

My dd is still having her milk at night and no surprise here nappy is always full in the morning she will be 3 at the beginning of November, she is dry in the day, should I wait for dry nappies before going down the removal route.? Thanks

Ds1 and Ds2 were dry at night before in the day. Weird! We lifted at 10pm, once there was no nappy at night for afew months. I don't think you can control your wee at night when you are little until you are ready. Put a nappy on. Also limit drinks about an hour before bedtime. I have also heard that certain drinks in the day can stimulate the bladder at night, but I can't remember what they are. Tbh this was for a 10 year old boy, so if you dc is little just put the nappy back on until they're ready. My ds1 wasn't dry in the day until he was 3, but dry at night from 2. Odd huh?

Faced with an impending 'overnight' school trip in September, we've decided to try and get our DS (aged 7) dry at night so he doesn't have to suffer the indignities of pull-ups. One week in and I am still changing wet sheets at 2am, despite lifting him at 11pm. Is it actually possible to speed his progress? Does anyone have any good tips? Or am I just going to have to let nature take her own sweet time?

Fosse, you could try to get an alarm system, but this will take time to work even if you get one soon. I really think the pull-ups would be best for the trip. I bet you'd be amazed at how many in his class still use them.

I think that you can arm DS with some tips; he mustn't have fizzy drinks or caffeinated (like cola)after tea time, must drink well during the day so that he isn't thirsty at bedtime, absolutely must wee before he goes to sleep, especially if it is a long time between going to bed and sleeping.

Fosse get to the GP and ask for a ref to enuresis clinic

wetting under age 7 isn't considered a medical prob, aft age 7 there are things that can be done

in the meantime:
increase daytime fluid intake, to increase volume and thus holding capacity of the bladder
avoid red/brown drinks like tea, ribena, cola (can irritate the bladder) water or milk best
wee/teeth/wee (double voiding) at bedtime

Lots of children still wet at night at age 7, send him in pullups he won't be the only one

Thanks for the advice. It's very gratefully received. (Interesting point about making sure he has a pee before actually sleeping. He has a one before going to bed but it takes him a long time to drop off.) Will report back...hopefully with some good news.

I mentioned about weeing before sleep, because in a situation like a school trip away there is often a long time before going to bed and actually sleeping! Again at home, the interval can be long, where there is a bedtime story, or the child reads in bed for example.

Just want to say many, many thanks to everyone who gave me advice on this thread. I followed it all, including peeing before sleep and avoiding 'brown drinks'. I also tried a bit of cod-psychology by putting a 'lucky charm' under DSs pillow. And....he's been completely dry for the past 9 months!

That's great to hear, Fosse. I wonder how lorelilees DS got on, and all the other DC in this post?