help help help DD1 back in pullups after 9 month potty failure

[stripeysock]

After pressure from M in L( ex H. Vis and damned annoying) and Nursery that i would be holding DD back if i didn't potty train I started at 2yrs 2 months . She is three next month and has never really got it in terms of wees. She refused to poo in a nappy from about 1yr 9 months and always had that right. Now she is pooing in her pants. I feel the wee thing has been toilet timing rather than toilet training.
It got even worse when DS was born 4 months ago and since then we have had varying degrees of failure and a little success. When everybody is together at the weekends or on hols it is better but mostly its at least three pairs of dirty pants a day. She can hold onto the wee for a long time. This morning after asking her to sit on the toilet she refused and walked off and did a wee within a minute. This is not uncommon.
My own health vis advised me three months ago to go back to basics ie nappies.
I talked to her about it previously but she begged me not to. DP attempted to last week but she faught him off.
This morning i put her back in pullups, she let me and i am feeling awfull that i am ruining her self esteem.
However i just feel I cant be positive and up beat anymore about constant accidents.

Has anyone else got experience of going backwards after such a mammouth failure???

Putting back in nappies is not going to be holding her back. Children potty train in their own time, I struggled with my first two my first did not potty train fully until nearly 5 then went fully trained day and night by himself suddenly. I put up with nearly three years of accidents and dealing with them.

My dd my second child was just gone 4 before she was trained and having struggled with dc1 I put her back in nappies for a while when dc3 was born, made no difference, like her older sibling did it herself when she was ready.

My dc3 was nappy-free during the day at 2.5, but this time it was his doing and not mine.

There is no harm in reverting to nappies. I think a stress-free mum is more important that trying to force potty-training too early. You can try again in a few months time, in the meantime just enjoy your two little ones.