Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Potty training

Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

Why doesn't he mind having a dirty nappy?

4 replies

MadameCheese · 20/05/2011 11:02

I plan to have a good look at the "reluctant potty training" thread when I have a mo but thought I needed to get this question off my chest. DS 3.1 (still in nappies) doesn't tell me when he's pooed. Sometimes he will flatly deny having done it when I ask. I'm finding it frustrating that he doesn't seem to mind having a dirty bottom. It's really bugging me, so should I just chill out? Incidentally he doesn't seem remotely ready/ bothered about potty training.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
MadameCheese · 20/05/2011 13:53

Anyone?

OP posts:
girlywhirly · 20/05/2011 15:36

Some children really don't mind about having a soiled nappy. It has nothing to do with intelligence, and in your DS' case I think he knows when he needs to poo before he does it. I suspect that actually he quite likes it, and is attached to his poo as it is a part of him. So this is why he denies doing it, I think. He certainly knows it bugs you, but really can't see what the big deal is; I guess he doesn't care about potty training, because he doesn't think it applies to him as you just put another nappy on and that's the way things are. And adults using the toilet has nothing to do with a little boy doing the same to his way of thinking.

I do think that some children need to be pro-actively trained, and that they can become conditioned to use nappies. It would be good to start with some pre-training, getting him used to seeing other children use the potty and toilet, buying potties and loo seats and new pants, reading books about potty and loo using, and all the time giving a clear message that this is what we all do. Is he your first? Sometimes it can be harder for only children unless they go to a nursery and see other children using loos and potties regularly.

When you do start, don't use pull-ups. He will just view them as a new type of nappy. Plan to stay close to home, and if the weather is warm you can be in the garden with the potty and accidents are less of a problem. When you do venture out, loose shorts with elasticated waists can be worn without pants underneath, OK they won't absorb an accident, but it's one less item to wash! Those swim shorts are good too, and quick to dry if you're running out of clothes.

The main thing about potty training I found, was to have a philosophical approach. It's a new skill to be learned, like dressing or using cutlery. It isn't that much of a problem if children put on clothes back to front or bits of food get knocked off their plates, so wet and soiled clothes are bound to happen, and we just take steps to protect the sofa and get a good carpet cleaning spray. DS will pick up on any tension, so you need an almost zen-like calm and a matter-of-fact attitude.

Hope this helps!

LoveBeingAbleToNamechange · 21/05/2011 06:43

My dd is exactly the same however if I do manage to put her on the potty so doesn't have issues when she's done something is intact very happy.

I went down the pull uproute bur it's not working some am gonna have to bite the bullet and go for pants, have bought loads of cheap ones. Just deciding when to start!

MadameCheese · 22/05/2011 14:36

Thanks very much girly. We've tried on 3 occasions already without much success and we've pretty much done as you've suggested without luck. I think it must also come down to how the child feels about being soiled/wet and whether he recognises the signs. For example he will wee on demand in the potty if we're changing him but be drenched again within half an hour.

Good luck LoveBeing

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread