Help - back to poo'in in pants!

[Flojo28]

I'm at my wits end - my DS (3 1/2) has been potty trained since last October and until a couple of months ago he was dry and clean during the day.

Now he's back to poo'in in his pants and nothing we try seems to work to get him out of it!

Nothing has changed in his daily routine and there are no problems at home so can't understand why he has gone back to this.

We've tried reward charts (they work pretty much but as soon as we stop them he goes back again), tried reward him for going to loo, heaping praise on him when he goes, telling him it makes us sad when he poo's in his pants, everything - nothing works, he's poo'ed everyday but one this week in his pants!!

One of our problems he's now in pre school at nursery (3 days a week) and we feel so guilty that they are having to deal with this.

Any idea's or help would be so appreaciated.

xx

Does he roughly go at the same time every day?
Could you brief the nursery to be ready with lots of reminders round about that time?

My 4 yr old DS has just started doing the same. He 'regressed' just before he started school so wasn't too worried and didn't make a fuss as I thought it was nerves (although we deliberately didn't make a big thing about going to school). Trouble is he's settled in fine & seems to enjoy school but this week he's pooed in his pants several times a day.

Tried encouragement, praise, rewards, disappointed looks and talking to him to see if tummy ache, shyness, fear of loo, etc. is the problem.

He does ask to go for a poo sometimes but seems not remotely bothered that he's sitting in s**t or that he smells even though all his friends don't!

At wits end and don't know what to try next as more fuss may make him regress further. Aaagh!

Any advice or thoughts really appreciated.

Yay, found this helpful thread:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/behaviour_development/1217586-Feel-a-failure-DS-keeps-pooing-pants-and-wont-stop-picking-nose

Thanks for posting this. i posted on AIBU awhile ago b/c my dd 3 1/2 wasn't wiping her own bottom. But now, for the past week or so we've had dirty knickers every day, sometimes twice a day, if only I could go back to the 'problem' of having to help her wipe herself. I can't think of anything changing to make her upset, ds is 1 so it's not like he's a new addition to the family. The helpful thread that linnet57 posted has a link to a book on amazon that i'm going to buy. We've been to the doctors, they think she's constipated so we are monitoring her diet which i think is very good, but i've been making her eat prunes and more raw veg and drink more water. We go back on Wednesday and the doctor says if things don't improve she's going to go on laxatives. I don't think I'm going to go down this route - I'd rather figure out the cause of the problem rather than just treat the symptoms. I have to say, it's breaking my heart. I really feel for all of us on here...xx

Hi all. The poo pants issue is horrific. It has taken 2 years to get to a point where I think we may possibly just be getting over it (please don't let me jinx myself there).

And when I say "over it" we are still on one sachet of movicol a day and probably will be for a while. It started off as a physical problem but very quickly got tangled up with other issues: most of all, it was a way to get attention. DD (4) did admit she was scared she'd not get the same amount of attention from me if the problem "went away"

The book that did it was the Anthony Cohn one as previously mentioned www.amazon.co.uk/Constipation-Withholding-Your-Child-Soiling/dp/1843104911

BUY IT. If you have to scrub pants it will change your life!!!

Madhousewife, please, PLEASE don't be scared of laxatives. If we'd been on them sooner then we'd probably not have taken so long to get over the problem. DD has a great diet and still gets constipated. Movicol isn't even absorbed by the body so it's 100% safe. The sooner they are pooing with ease, the less time they have to learn the "poo hurts so I'll hold onto it" lesson, which is very VERY hard to unlearn.

flojo All the reward charts and treats in the world didn't work for us either. You promise them the world and they still don't stay clean, it's heartbreaking.

Best of luck everyone. It will get better.

thanks nicobean, i'm back to the doctor's tomorrow morning and i was just thinking about how i was going to refuse the laxatives - you've made me seriously rethink this. i'm also eagerly awaiting my book - all three poo books i've ordered!! thanks for your kind post!

No problem madhousewife, I'm sure you and DD be on top of the issue soon if it's only been a week or two of poo pants. Good luck!