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Potty training

Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

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Original poster

The only 3yr old girl in the world who isn't potty trained?

32 replies

Phish · 26/12/2010 18:46

Hi, DD turned 3 a week ago. We've made a few previous half hearted attempts at potty training in the past six months but she really didnt seem to know when she was weeing so we gave up and reverted to nappies/ pull-ups.

We've decided to go for it now she's 3 and we have time off work to focus. Today she's wee'd four times and each was in her knickers just after getting off the potty having had a "try" (i.e. nothing coming out). Still doesnt seem to have a clue when she needs to go.

All of her friends and peers at nursery, boys and girls, are potty trained and have been for some time. It really feels like she is the only 3yr old girl in the workd who isnt potty trained.

I know its only day one but it still feels like she's miles off. Can someone give me some hope/ advice?

OP posts:

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fidelma · 27/12/2010 13:41

Just keep going.The fact that she wee'd close to being on the potty is a good start.Well done her.

I would reward her for having a go and a bigger reward for doing a wee.

make it fun.Be relaxed it will happen.Plenty 3 year olds still where nappies.

However don't stop.If after 7 days she hasn't managed 1 wee in the potty then think again.

Would she prefer the toilet?

All the best. It is about the parents being ready as much as the child. x

Ilythia · 29/12/2010 11:38

I am so happy to see this thread, was just coming on to see if anyone else is trying now! How is it going?
DD2 is 3.2. she only really wees 3 times a day (she has good bladder control) but will just let go when she needs to.

She will sit on the loo and the potty but as she doesn't need to go a lot nothing happens. So far in her life she has pood once in the loo, and that is because I lifted her from the bath when I saw her face She was not happy.

She is at full time nursery in pull ups and they ask her to sit on the loo and try but she just sits on it for a bit, and then goes in her pull ups.
We have gone cold turkey from this morning as I didn't think it was fair to do it when she is at nursery, I have a week. She has stickers for sitting on the potty and trying and chocolate buttons if she does anything.
So far one sticker and nothign else. She is now yelling at me when I ask if she needs a wee even though she has not done one since 8am. Its like a ticking clock

Ivette · 29/12/2010 11:58

keep going, my daughter is 3y2m and I started potty training when she was 20m without success.
then I started again few mionths later and it was unsuccessful again
but she is fine now. I only use nappies at night because she will not wake up but they are dry almost all the time so it is fine.
but I remeber that first 3 weeks she was weeing everywhere, she didnt notice when she was all wet, that took same time, you just must be patient. and most important - take off nappies, put knickers on and ask her every 30 minutes or so if she needs to go

Ilythia · 29/12/2010 12:28

DD2 is now crying when I ask her, she does 'NOT NEED TO HAVE A WEE, MUMMY'

Still nothing...

Mumcah · 29/12/2010 20:57

You are not alone.DD is 2.9 and not remotely interested in sitting on the potty or loo. We tried potty training 3 months ago and it was a disaster so gave up after 3 days. We're going to give it another go soon but I'm not hopeful!

nikki1978 · 29/12/2010 21:01

DS is 3 years and 10 months and has shown no signs of wanting to potty train. We have tried a few times and will be trying again next week but this time there is no going back to nappies! He is 4 soon for gods sake. Stubborn little bugger.

Seriously though DD didn't get it until she was over 3 and a half and she got the hang of it very quickly.

Just thank your lucky stars you are not me!

mamasmissionimpossible · 29/12/2010 21:02

My dd is 3 next month and is still not potty trained. We have had one wee in a potty, but she is not interested in taking off the nappies completely. My ds was a late potty trainer. When he wanted to train, it was really easy. I'm still waiting for dd's potty training epiphany So no, you are not alone.

TrinityMotherOfRhinos · 29/12/2010 21:05

she just needs some time to get used to it

and really get the idea IMO

at least you dont have a nearly 6 year old wetting herself and not seeming to give a shit about it

Rosebud05 · 29/12/2010 21:05

A couple of 3 year olds at my dcs' nursery wear nappies. I don't think it's that unusual, though stressful for the parents, I think, with their own internal pressure and people asking them about it.

peggotty · 29/12/2010 21:14

I think they need a couple of days of wet pants until it 'clicks'. DS did this recently. He appeared to be completely clueless and was wetting himself constantly for 2 or 3 days, then he started taking himself off to the potty. He was obviously ready though.

indiechick · 29/12/2010 21:19

God, I am so glad it's not just me. DD2 is 2.9 and is showing no signs of being ready. Also has a problem with constipation which I think we need to remedy first before trying the potty training again. It's embarressing though and I'm sure at nursery they would prefer her to be potty trained. But what can I do, we have tried this holiday, it's been a disaster. I've given up as she's now got an ear and chest infection and I can't be doing with potty training at the same time. So I guess we'll try again at Easter.

ilythia · 30/12/2010 12:02

Well we managed 2 wet knicks and a poo yesterday, and now she won't even sit on the potty or the loo saying 'I dont need to!!!!'

On the plus she hates being wet so with any luck it will sink in. eventually. ugh.

Oh, she has just copme over crying and asking for a nappy. have sat her on the potty with nick jr on...fingers crossed.

ilythia · 30/12/2010 12:13

Nope, nothing, humph. Have ordered some bright bots as I have to get her to nursery full time next week so would rather send her in them than have to bring home bags of washing eveyr day...

Suzihaha · 30/12/2010 12:16

Hey, don't worry. My friend's DD1 was 3 and a half before she was potty trained in the day and 4 before nappies came off at night.

I think each child has their own time when they are good and ready and we shouldn't feel pressured just because they reach a certain age and all their peers are no longer in nappies.

DS1 has only just started using the toilet (he's 2.11). I waited until he asked to go. I introduced the potty/ concept of the toilet 6 months ago but until now he didn't want to. I give him a reward every time he goes and that's a real incentive now.

I rarely need to ask him and he takes himself there when he needs to. He's been completely dry for the last 3 days but I am not brave enough to switch to pants just yet. He's still in pull ups.

Good luck. If she really doesn't want to go then don't push her. She'll let you know when she's ready.

Original poster

Phish · 30/12/2010 18:36

Thanks everyone. Gives me some hope. It's been really hit and miss and she gets so annoyed with us constantly asking if she needs a wee.

Ilythia we're in exactly the same position as you in that she's back to nursery four days next week and they don't seem very keen on supporting potty training. Hopefully she gets it in the next few days!

OP posts:

TabithaTwitchet · 30/12/2010 18:55

Phish, are you me?
DD is also 3 yrs and 1 week, and not potty trained. And is absolutely refusing to wear her big girl pants, although I have hyped them up all week, in hope we could do it now while we are all at home.
I am currently pregnant, I have told her when the baby comes she'll have to wear pants because the baby will need her nappies. She said "No, Mummy, the baby will have his own nappies, he'll be too small for mine."
I am hoping that one day she will decide of her own accord that she wants to potty train. On all our abortive attempts so far, she has held her wees in ALL DAY, and then promptly leaked out of her nappy at night time and soaked her bed .
It's nice to hear there are other 3 yr olds out there who aren't ready yet either!

julescat74 · 30/12/2010 20:25

My DD is 3.3 years and is uninterested in using the potty or toilet for her wees. She will take herself off and poo in the big toilet but just doesn't seem to be bothered about weeing. I have tried putting her in knickers and putting a potty in front of her and asking her if she needs to wee every 30 mins. She says no and then wets herself. At the moment I have given up and reverted to pullups (not the wet feel type). I have tried various incentives such as stickers, chocolate stars but nothing seems to be working. We are going to try again from Saturday but at the moment don't hold out much hope of sucess :(

ilythia · 30/12/2010 20:30

Well after weeing everywhere and pooing in the knicks yesterday today has been amazing.

I caught her mid wee earlier, grabbed her and dumped her on the potty (we have an upstairs loo which dd1 had problems getting to on time, so have one of those flip lid potties in the sitting room) and managed to catch a teeny amount of wee in it. Massive fuss, chocolate buttons, stickers, and you could see the cogs turning!
A few hours later, she came into the kitchen and asked for chocolate, having taken herself to the potty and weed in it. and then she did the same with a poo later That got 4 chocolate buttons (I am much happier to clean up wee...) and she did another wee before bed.

I think the trick was not asking her all the time, she got mega pissed off with me, I just let her do it herself, I mean, she is 3 and old enough to sort herself out.

Fingers crossed for tomorrow...

dikkertjedap · 30/12/2010 22:01

To help her make the link it is important that she wees often. We (my mom helped, well, did it really) potty trained in one day (then reinforced the rest of the week). Basically, keep dd without trousers and underpants (we did it during Summer, so only if your house is warm enough and not drafty). Give her frequent drinks (much more frequent than normal). My dd used to wiggle when she needs to wee, clear sign to put her on potty, otherwise you will have to guess the timing, I would start with 10 minutes after the drink (if accident before, then reduce to five minutes etc.). If she wees we gave a little present (could be a nice story, playing a game, a sweet, whatever you fancy) and LOTS LOTS OF PRAISE. If nothing happens also fine, just say if you can do a wee wee on the potty you will get X as reward. Ignore accidents, if she thinks that accident was a success (I did try to get on potty but was just to late) then still give a reward. Was a very intense day, the whole day revolved around the potty. But she made the link and was extremely proud. Reinforce the rest of the week. We did both day and night, but you can of course only do day to start with. At night we put her on potty (then)/loo (now) when we go to bed (she is still kind of asleep but that does not seem to be a problem). Good luck, she will get there.

ilythia · 31/12/2010 08:45

I think the problem I have had is that DD2 is a lot more self aware at this age and so if I left ehr without a nappy she would freak out, and she is strong enough to physically stop me sitting her on the potty as well!
It's just a matter of waiting until they are willing to do it themselves I think..

Original poster

Phish · 31/12/2010 21:13

Ilythia congratulations on yesterday.

We had a good day today. DD told us several times today that she needed a wee and asked to watch Peppa at the same time. At first I thought she was just using it as a ploy to watch Peppa but she did a wee every time. Completely dry all day with no accidents....woo hoo!

Still worried about nursery thought as they don't have Peppa on tap like we do at home!

OP posts:

neolara · 31/12/2010 21:21

Can I just offer up my ds to make you feel better. He was 4 a few days ago and still has wet pants at least once a day. We've been at it for 18 months.

porcamiseria · 07/01/2011 22:25

so releived, DSW is 3 in march, and yup still in nappies

manana...manana

we need to just DO IT

will re read again for advice.

MadamDeathstare · 07/01/2011 22:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

simpson · 07/01/2011 23:26

DD is 3 at the end of this month and still in pull ups.

We had one attempt at potty trining a couple of months ago and she managed a poo on the potty but tbh I think that was because I could tell she needed to go and managed to get her in time iyswim otherwise she would have pooed in her knickers

I was all ready to give it a go in the Xmas holidays but her older brother got chicken pox badly and I thought "no way"

ATM I am saying to her that when she is 3 she is a big girl and nappies/pull ups are going, but I don't hold out much hope

She will sit on potty happily and say "I did one" expecting reward but has done nothing

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