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Potty training

Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

Major potty training issues - please please help!

8 replies

ovumahead · 11/12/2010 14:17

We're REALLY struggling to train our ds to potty train. I'll admit we've made a few classic errors. For example, we started too early (around 1.5 years, because he insisted on wearing some pants that were given to us in a bag full of second hand clothes - we thought, 'OK, he seems keen, let's go with it' Stupid? Yes?)

He'll use the potty occasionally with me, but only on the very odd occasion with other people he knows well, like his grandma and his dad. But more recently he's been refusing to use the potty more than using it, and has been wetting himself intentionally, and he doesn't mind being wet.

At nursery, he's always refused to use the potty or toilet. In the past he's said he's scared, but he wouldn't say what exactly. I get the impression that he finds the public nature of going to the loo quite hard, and they started trying to get him to use the potty. I also know they've pressured him (IMO) e.g. by getting him to sit on the potty for half an hour and reading him books and encouraging him to wee. I also think that they've become quite jaded with the whole thing, and have clearly lost a lot of enthusiasm. I understand why, because I feel the same unfortunately.

My instinct tells me to backtrack and put him in to nappies for a bit, ease off, and come back to him when he's good and ready, and perhaps when we've got to the bottom of what his anxieties are all about. But everything I read clearly says 'Don't put your child back in to nappies once you've switched to pants'.

HELP!

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ovumahead · 11/12/2010 14:19

BTW he's 2 and 3/4 now.

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Rindercella · 11/12/2010 14:21

How old is he now?

My instinct would be to put him back in nappies, and wait until his interest is sparked again. Why put both of you through the stress if you don't need to?

I am probably way off track according to all experts, but that's what I would personally do.

Rindercella · 11/12/2010 14:23

x/post

1 1/4 years is a long time to have been struggling with this.

I would leave it a couple of months and start afresh.

franke · 11/12/2010 14:23

I think you should go with your instincts. Once the pressure's off he may go back to using the potty of his own volition, and it may happen sooner than you imagine.

ovumahead · 12/12/2010 10:06

Thanks for all your advice. Only trouble is, is that he actually doesn't want to wear nappies! He insists on wearing pants, but then wets himself or holds it in for a ridiculously long time...

I just don't know what to do!

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ziggyf · 13/12/2010 20:30

If he won't wear nappies then could you put him in pull-ups? If he's not keen on disposable pull-ups you could try him in reusable pull-ups - Super Undies are very good. I also saw a thread about some padded pants that look like normal pants somewhere a while ago... I'll see if I can track it down.

ovumahead · 15/12/2010 08:44

Thanks... He was happily wearing pull ups for a while and using them as nappies, so we'll just go with that for now.

Thanks so much for your help.

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CaptainBarnacles · 15/12/2010 08:58

I don't think there's anything wrong with putting them back in nappies - I did this a couple of times with DD, and she finally potty trained in a couple of days a few weeks ago.

I think what they don't encourage is putting them in pants some days, and nappies others. (E.g. if you want to go on a long car journey...)

Good luck! I am sure he will get it in the end.

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