Lots of positive signs but crying and running away from potty. Help!

[prettypotty]

DS 2.8 seemed to be ready for potty training. Keen on the idea when discussed, hates nappy changes with a passion, wants to wear pants instead, seems to have some control over when he goes BUT when we tried to switch to potty/toilet he just doesn't want to use either of them. He cries, cowers in corners and gets very distressed. He also gets upset when he wees on the floor (says "oh dear" before the wee appears).

The "put them on the potty every [however long]" approach just doesn't work - he won't get on or stay on. We don't feel we can force him to use it so... not ready?

Has anyone else had this situation? Did you just stop and give it another go in a month or so, or keep him out of nappies on the basis that eventually he'll decide it's easier to use the potty?

Not done this before and feel I'm massively messing it up atm. Desperately don't want him to get a complex about it all. Would be happy with accidents if he wasn't so distressed about them.

My dd wasn't ready until she was about 3, and then she was very good with extremely few accidents. We were given a marvellous book which explains to toddlers what they are doing on the potty. It was by Alona Frankel ( I think) and called 'Once upon a Potty' (I think - I'm afraid I passed it on to another ma.) The other books my dd had just beat about the bush, but this one is really quite graphic and I think toddlers are reassured by it. Good luck!

Ooh, this one? I was thinking books might help us forward. It's so difficult. Don't want to be pushy if he's not ready, don't want to be rubbish and not help him along if he is.

ah that's it! very nostalgic to see it again. Yes, we read this one pretty much every day & it seemed to click! it's like studying the theory before you take your driving test.

Great, thanks. I'll get that ordered as step 1!

Oh my dd 3.4 really likes this book, and I even changed the characters name to hers which she liked even more.

Picked up a book today which has helped a little. Interested in opinions about carrying on or abandoning for a while though?

Hmmm that's a tough one. I remember doing the switch at about the time of my dd's 3rd bithday. She was never distressed about nappy changes, but she did get very upset about accidents. I'm ashamed to admit that sometimes I got visibly frazzled clearing up the mess. This obviously distressed her even more, poor thing. But there really were a very few, bless her.
If your ds really hates wearing nappies & being changed, and you have a floor that's easy to clean, I'd go for wearing pants and rewarding him with stickers (we used silver & gold star ones) if he manages to sit on the potty. If you can take the expense, it's worth asking him to choose a new potty and/or pants so he feels involved in the process - but obviously ignore this if you've already shelled out loads. Good luck again, and remember that it's true - this stage really doesn't last forever.

You've just cheered me up. Thank you!

The other thing we did today was get him to choose new pants and potty (previous one was borrowed from a friend). He seemed to be very enthusiastic about the pants, and tentatively enthusiastic about the potty, so we're hoping he won't run away from it tomorrow.

The first potty I bought was a cheap pink one - I didn't think it mattered. My daughter (24 months) was not interested but seemed to know what was happening and be ready. She first used a potty when she visited a friend's house when their little boy used it. My friend just sat them both in front of a DVD and praised when something happened. Then we got a frog potty (Fisher Price) which seemed comfier and bought a book called "where's my potty". We have made a big thing of the potty and clapped and cheered when she went on the potty. Even when she just sat on it. She now performs on the potty most times and is very proud, even performing for guests and family! Clothes confuse the matter though.