Depression after forceps and episiotomy

[Pregnantgrumps]

Just need to get this out.

I had a very traumatic birth 5 weeks ago which ended up with forceps and an episiotomy. I feel like the health professionals at the time made out this would be a really quick straightforward recovery, even saying "At least we managed to avoid a c-section!" and my personal favourite by a male doctor "I think often when women say they feel pain after episiotomies its psychological".

I've found the recovery so much harder than I ever could have imagined and feel like there's no end in sight. It's really taking its toll on my mental health and I feel completely trapped in my body and in my home.

I've been in and out the hospital with suspected infections due to severe pain but have been told this is normal. The GP diagnosed a wound breakdown but the hospital disagreed. I had been hoping things were feeling turning a corner but the last few days I've been in more pain again, it's starting to bleed again and really doesn't look right. I did call the hospital again but they've been very dismissive and said someone will call me back, which hasn't happened yet, and I felt very dismissed.

I've barely been out the house in 5 weeks due to barely being able to walk and even doing things in the house is difficult. Other than being with my partner and my baby I have no joy in life anymore it feels due to basically being trapped at home. I realise that sounds dramatic but I think it's due to this going on for more than a month and with no end in sight. I'm terrified I'll never be physically able to do the things I love ever again.

Hi OP, I am so sorry to read this. I also had episiotomy and forceps and the recovery was brutal - I feel strongly that we are not properly warned about the risks of a vaginal birth and how hard the recovery can be. Several times I was told the out and out lie that I would have a better recovery than if I had a section. However, I did recover and am able to do most things again now. I am certain that will be the case for you as well. I know that doesn’t make it any easier now but please don’t feel that you won’t continue to receive over time because you absolutely will.

congratulations on your baby and I hope you’re feeling better soon 💐

I had a forceps birth with episiotomy 16 weeks ago now after a low risk pregnancy. I also lost a lot of blood after my placenta was manually removed. My recovery was horrific and I was in so much pain, wondering if I’d ever walk again without peeing or shuffling. I literally dragged myself along the floor rather than walk it was so painful. It really affected the start of my baby’s life, our bond and my happiness. But around 6 weeks things started improving. After 12 weeks I stopped bleeding and the infections I faced cleared up. Now at 16 weeks I’m able to walk 3-5 miles comfortably, although I haven’t run yet (keen runner up to giving birth). And I love my baby and feel so bonded and happy now. It’s taken me longer than I thought but I do feel recovered, so there’s light at the end of the tunnel for you. Keep pushing the medical teams, just harass them until they help you. I’ve also booked a private Mummy MOT for next month as I do still have pelvic floor troubles but it’s vastly improved from the start.