When will I feel normal again?

[Catk34]

I’m 2 months PP and my whole body just feels Weird!
I can’t explain it, I just feel odd and have done ever since my boy was born. I’m guessing it’s all due to hormones and a massive life change but when does it get better?

Honestly? I think about 2 years (or a few months after you stop breastfeeding, whichever is later). It’s a combination of breastfeeding, weaning, sleep deprivation, regaining strength, nutrition, and rediscovering adult relationships. Even focusing on some of the above will make a big difference. If you can afford it, get a babysitter to give you and your husband breaks together as soon as possible, and obviously make sure he’s pulling his weight. A lot of partners, however loving, cannot see how draining it is unless they’re up all night for several nights in a row while you rest. You’re really in the thick of it now with sleep deprivation after the lovey dovey post partum hormones have subsided. Your body has been through a lot and your life has changed completely.

Didn’t want to read and run. It does get better. At about 2 years mark I felt completely normal. It can take longer or shorter, everyone is different but you will get there. Prioritise good nutrition, take short or long breaks (whichever possible) for YOU as much as possible and proactively ask for help from the ones closest.

could breastfeeding be the reason I feel so strange? I find breastfeeding to be so hard and wish I’d been told all the negatives to breastfeeding before I had a baby so I could have actually thought it through. My baby gets so much comfort from it now that I don’t feel I can take it away from him

It takes a really long time and you just gradually get better rather than you’re suddenly back to normal, well a new normal really, it’s a very odd thing and quite unexpected.

Hi OP. Breastfeeding is a ride, but honestly it is so easy after 6 months compared to where you’ll be at now, I had planned to stop at 6m but have found myself still going now at 8 months PP. 6m PP was a turning point for me, I was back in the gym more and don’t really feel like I physically had a baby if that makes sense!

I really feel for you. What you're experiencing is, what I gather, we all experience!

I am 5 months PP with my first child. Things are getting a bit easier now but its a really transformative journey... and transformation isn't necessarily comfortable! I was really healthy throughout my pregnancy but the actual birth ended up being unexpectedly brutal. I had to detach mentally just to get through it and then I came back to a body that was in total tatters. I think even if your birth isn't complicated, there is a lot of psychological AND physical recovery to do... but no time to do it. You're head first into motherhood! It's a surreal experience and one that is anything but linear in terms of recovery.

However, for whatever reason, it does get easier. As others have said, lack of sleep really doesn't help! That will improve, with some bumps along the way. Physically, where I am now a mere 3 months ahead of you, on the outside I look like myself pre-pregnancy... but unseen I DO still have diastasis recti, discomfort during sex, and have had horrible issues with my bowls. All that extra head hair I got during pregnancy is now shedding on every surface, my scalp is flaky/itchy all the time, and I feel like I smell weird lol. But the absolute abject lack of control inside my body that I felt I had in the first few months PP has quietened down. I think this entire birth and postpartum experience has really forced me, for the first time, to TRULY reckon with the fact I am not in control. That has both felt terrifying at times and totally enlightening.

Sending very best to you ❤

Oh, also, re breastfeeding, from what I gather it is possible it's making you feel strange due to its role in suppressing certain hormones (and also just adjusting to your nipples having a different role and sensitivity to them - I've found that a bit psychologically odd at times, personally!). HOWEVER this is another thing that really does get so much easier... and for your overall physical health and recovery, from bouncing back to your pre-pregnancy size/shape to lifelong cancer prevention (never mind your child's health), it is a big net benefit, if you can manage to persevere without it negatively impacting your mental health🙏Very best wishes to you again!

In terms of breastfeeding depends what you mean by feeling strange. I did not lose a good amount of weight I gained until I stopped BF when my baby was 1. Also BF for me made me feel like my body was just serving a purpose and didn’t really belong to me. I didn’t enjoy it at all but had wanted to do it for the benefits (please no argument from anyone here about formula we’re all entitled to our opinions!). BF is a wonderful thing to do for your baby but if you’re struggling with it there is also no harm in trying some formula to combi feed. This is what I did around 10 months

It gets incrementally better. For me both times newborn days were horrid. It got better at the below milestones:

8 weeks
3 months
6 months

I’m 6 months in with my second now and feel somewhat normal, but I know from experience that I’ll feel even better in another 6 months. Hang in there X