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Think I’m depressed with 3rd child…

3 replies

LuminousD · 17/06/2025 20:41

Hello,

Hoping someone might be able to help. I’m nearly 11 months in with my third child and think I need to accept that I may have developed postnatal depression. To be honest, it’s probably been there since birth but maybe kept at bay from the sheer adrenaline of constant feeding and caring for my other two older children also (8 and 5).
I’m already on medication from a bit pre-pregnancy as I developed some serious health issues (thankfully all fine now) a few years ago then had two sudden close family members die.

So, I’m not sure what can maybe help? I think the lack of support and loneliness is huge (my family live in another part of the UK and DH’s parents are pretty old and unwilling to offer to help (or even accept it when we’ve desperately needed a few hours of childcare to visit a and e etc)! We live in a fairly remote countryside location and some of my main friendship circle have recently relocated within the UK or even moved countries. I joined a baby group when DD was younger but the Mums there all had older babies and were already connected. There’s not really other baby groups locally and I’m scratching my head to figure out how to get out of this funk.
I had to leave my long career due to the serious illness I mentioned above, and previously getting back to work with childcare in place was something to look forward to. I’m starting my own business, but it’s the very beginning stages and unusually, all the nurseries are full and while I’ve some potential childminders I can use, they can’t confirm anything yet (ie one is waiting to see if a few days can be freed up etc). I’m hoping getting childcare will help long term and the purpose of working too.
Months ago, I was happy enough just to get out for a walk or coffee even alone, but I’m just feeling so trapped and sad.
My Husband is lovely, supportive (could be better at chores though lol), but understands my predicament.

Sorry this is so long. If you have any thoughts or advice, I would really welcome them as I know this doesn’t have to be the dark tunnel I see myself in. Thankyou ❤️

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Dancingcandlestick · 17/06/2025 20:53

I didn't want to read & run for this as I've been there with PND. I think you sound incredibly reflective & capable of moving through this. ❤️ Have you reached out for therapy? I found it so helpful to have an impartial ear.

Definitely having social interactions outside of the home will help. Are there any gym classes near you? Even if you don't form deep friendships they are a great way to get out of the house.

LuminousD · 18/06/2025 10:34

Dancingcandlestick · 17/06/2025 20:53

I didn't want to read & run for this as I've been there with PND. I think you sound incredibly reflective & capable of moving through this. ❤️ Have you reached out for therapy? I found it so helpful to have an impartial ear.

Definitely having social interactions outside of the home will help. Are there any gym classes near you? Even if you don't form deep friendships they are a great way to get out of the house.

Aw thanks and good to know you’ve been through it and come out the other side! I think gym classes might be a real solution as I used to be very active and have really done no exercise postnatally with my third (other than walks). Feels like a good nudge for me to explore.
Thank you for your kind words and taking the time to reply ❤️

OP posts:
Dancingcandlestick · 02/07/2025 14:34

@LuminousD just wanted to check in and see how are you feeling now? That first year (or two!) postpartum is such a marathon isn't it!

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