Postpartum 'glow up' tips?

[Applecrumble0110]

So im not sure this is in the correct section but I'm 6M pp with baby number 2 and got pregnant when baby number 1 was 13M. So essentially I was still big and frumpy and lost in motherhood and have been for 2 years. Aside from the obvious, eating well and exercise, I was wondering if anyone had tips and tricks for things they did after having kids to make themselves feel better or like their old selves. Any tips welcome as I'm really low right now and barely even brush my hair with a velcro baby and clingy toddler.

When i had ds1 i was determined to look my best. Looking back i had some kind of Stepford wife idea that I had to look perfect, I dont know where that came from because it certainly wasn't from Dh.
Anyway, I had a lot of treaments before the birth, hair highlighted, .manicure, pedicure, leg waxing, eyelash tint false eye lashes etc. This is 29 years ago before all the social media pressure to look good!
I kept it up after the baby was born so it was a minimal day to day effort to look good. Dh had the baby while I went to the salon!
I know you are feeling low and everything can seem like a huge effort. One thing I would definitely suggest is to get out of the house each day if you can, even if you don't feel like it. A walk with the pram, meeting up with friends or even going for a coffee with just you and baby can help lift your mood.

@notacooldad thank you so much!! I do get out and about but I feel miserable cause of the way I look to be honest. So the beauty treatments seem like a good idea. Migbt start with a haircut and dye my greys (got loads all of a sudden after having DC1!!). Followed by a pedicure . Thank you!

I remember so.e of my extended family thinking ( and telling me) I was vain, and perhaps I was, having g all the treatments a couple of days before the birth but I don't regret it.
Image is important to me, even at 60 not obsessively so but I cared how I look before I had babies. If I looked like I'd let myself go, from how I was previously it would have dragged my mood down.

I made sure I showered and did my hair every day and put tinted moisturiser onand got myself and the baby into a routine. I drank plenty of water and im not kidding it made a difference to how I felt.
Of course you've been through a big change to your body and life but try to hold to to things you enjoy. That's important even if its a favourite tv programme, exercise class, whatever, do something you enjoy.

Yeah.. I got waxed everywhere below my eyebrows on my due date.

Get your roots done, a good trim - maybe don’t bother with nails under after the birth because they might have to remove the polish to check your nails.

I booked my next nail appointment from the postnatal ward - I think she was 5 days old DH kept the baby in the car outside in case she needed fed (BF).

Get yourself a nice handcream and moisturiser, and master overnight curls too (you can pick up a kit from Primark for £3).

I can completely empathise with this!
I’ve just had baby 2, and DD1 is 2.
I was just getting back into exercise when I got pregnant with DD2 so that then went out the window. I’m now 2 weeks pp, but feel and look terrible and have promised myself that this mat leave, I’ll prioritise myself earlier on and feel “better” sooner.

I’ve bought new make up as a boost, so I feel a bit more put together. I’m the same as you in that I’ve suddenly got LOADS of grey hairs out the blue after this last pregnancy. I’m debating getting my hair coloured as more of a boost as well.
I’ve never done my nails so that’s not something I associate with feeling good about myself.
I used to full body moisturise religiously after a shower pre kids, and barely do it now - so I’ve started again, even this has made me feel better and my arm skin looks better.
as soon as my legs or arms are stubbly, I shave rather than be lazy and avoid it - this helps.
however the biggest thing for me s my weight, so my priority will be to shift some lbs sooner rather than later!

Thank you guys for the tips! Tomorrow is a new day/week so I've booked myself in for a haircut tomorrow afternoon and we shall go from there. Likewise @babybabytime i think my weight is the biggest issue and I need to shift the pounds hefore i csn feel like myself again truly!

Hey, I’m 7m pp with baby number two so this is relatable. I got my hair cut much shorter which felt amazing after PP shedding & it only takes a few mins to blow dry & style now if I feel like ditching the slick back look for a change 😂 UKlash eyebrow & eyelash serum has been a game changer too as I look half decent without make up due to good brows and lashes (shedding was very real for me lol) and finally, tinted SPF & cream blusher, takes approx 30 seconds to revive my face.

@Btowngirl thank you! What tinted apf are you using ?

There’s 15 months in between mine and I felt exactly the same. I made a point of every Sunday I’d have an everything shower, hair mask, exfoliating, the lot then I’d blow dry my hair and curl it afterwards while my husband entertained the kids for an hour then on a morning I’d make sure I either dinr my hair or make up, one of them I could manage but never both. It was a quick 5 min hair style or make up and I’d do it downstairs while they ate breakfast.

it does pass though, our youngest is 18 months now and they’ll play for half hour or so while I get ready. Xx

I’m using super goop. Really like it, glowy without looking greasy!

Only had 1, but didn’t take care of myself properly (pandemic and DS didn’t sleep at all) and found that at 6m PP I looked bigger than I did pregnant…!
it rocked me tbh and I wish I had put more time into myself earlier. Lost myself- like for YEARS (this wasn’t the only reason but getting into the habit of deprioritizing myself utterly wasn’t helping at all)

if I were to have another this is what I would do (1) get support with sleep earlier and if it wasn’t working I would be much more deliberate about sharing the nights (got it in my head that only I could do it because of breastfeeding- ridiculous we had tones of pumped milk!) (2) prioritise my health - long walks every day with buggy - 2 hour long ones with podcasts or whatever (3) mounjaro (it wasn’t available then) because when I’m stressed/bored food is my comfort and I need helo
turning down the noise (4) if I couldn’t join a baby&muk exercise class I’d exercise in its weights at home with baby in bouncer (5) hair cut and colour (6) would dress with self respect all the time - not haut when I left the house - so I didn’t think “ick” every time I saw myself in a reflection
and I would meditate so I could grow the mental resilience to know that I am worthy of self care, and I am enough as I am, and that my health is essential and not an added extra

OP with regards to weight one thing I’ve found is to embrace and learn to accept your new shape. Obviously it would be great to get to your pre pregnancy weight and I’m not saying not to try get back your pre pregnancy shape but in the meantime don’t be obsessed with your old clothes and trying to squeeze into things that don’t fit . Likewise don’t wear shapeless stuff to disguise your shape as it will make you look bigger. Embrace who you are right now and buy some new stuff that will make you feel good. Also buy new undies. Throw away any well washed stuff. It sounds strange but nice comfy well fitting knickers can make all the difference. Don’t be obsessed with keeping hair long (if it is long) a fresh haircut can do wonders. Every month get eyebrows shaped and tinted and also a lash tint. If you can find a very local beauty salon that opens late when your DP is home from work then that’s ideal. One close to me opens until 8pm so I’d be able to go at 7 pm on a Tuesday or Wednesday to get my eyebrows/waxing /nails done. Also like others have said pick a night midweek and have a mini pampering session even just put on a face mask and deep conditioner and sit in the bath.

On the flip side it is also worth working on your self esteem. Post birth I had loads of new grey hair, some excess weight, loads of very noticeable hair loss, bad skin. I had a quick shower most days, shoved my pitiful hair in a bobble and bounced out the door happy as Larry. I felt great.

I don't want this to sound judgy. I do really appreciate that people enjoy all the nails and treatments stuff, and that's absolutely fine, but it should be a perk that you love doing, not something which is vital for you not to feel bad about yourself. You should feel good about yourself because you are kind/generous/loved/a mother/healthy/a good friend/trustworthy and so on. That's who you are. You are not summed up by the state of your cuticles.

Thank you for all the wonderful messages and tips everyone !!! For those of you mentioning being comfortable in your skin/self esteem. I have gone from a UK 8 to a UK 18 which I know there's nothing wrong with an 18 if someone is happy and healthy at that weight but to me it's been a shock. 5 stone weight gain after 2 babies and it's not budging but then again I could definitely work harder to get rid. I've got no nice clothes and do t even know what to wear anymore just in the same stretchy maternity stuff!!!

I do agree that being much heavier than you've previously been used to being is really hard. Can you identify when your danger times are for snacking etc and deliberately schedule your pamper sessions for those times? Paint yourself slim?!

Also, 5 stone is really daunting. Could you set a smaller target (but something noticeable to you where you will feel a bit better) and reward yourself with an outfit/haircut? Do it in steps like that. Have maintenance phases in between if that helps. You don't have to face 5 stone in a oner.

Oh wow well this is a good suggestion!!!! My worsr snacking most definitely happens early in the morning (sleep less nights and early mornings mean I eat muffins biscuits etc for energy) usually have a healthy lunch and dinner and then the night snacks whilst bf. 6m old still cluster feeds as he's never fed properly during the day and now he's weaning it's worse. I might try and drink some herbal tea and eat some fruit during those danger times!

Try and get extra sleep if you can. It has all round health benefits but I'm sure I've read about a link between poor sleep and not being able to lose weight as easily. Think about where you could get a nap in or maybe have a super early bedtime one or two nights a week?

Good idea. Bpyh DC are usually asleep by 7m30/8pm and most of the night wakeup begin at 1am. I miss my DH loads as he works alot so tbh I don't really get early nights as I want to spend time with him. I should ideally sleep early 3 nights a week, maybe every other night.

I felt this post in my bones! Currently 10 months postpartum with baby #2, and 2 stone down, 1 left to go.

Have you had your bloods done? Hypothyroidism is very common postpartum, and not commonly talked about. And is your cycle regular yet? TMI Q but usually women feel so much better when it is and when there is regular ovulation. This can take up to a year postpartum, longer if you're breastfeeding.

The biggest change for me looks wise has been upping my protein to 100-130g a day. I'm still EBF so I used an online calculator to work out my calories for weightloss while maintaining milk supply, and use MFP to track everything. I drink 3 litres of water, and get 10-12k of steps a day. I throw the rain cover on the buggy and one of my kids naps is a walk for me. Huge changes to weight, mood, and skin since I did that!.

I also stopped eating every time my children do. I don't need to snack between meals, or finish their snacks any time there's food left on the plate. I keep coke zero and chopped low calorie fruit in the fridge for if a sugar craving hits me (watermelon & mango are the nicest!)

For glowing up, I put a picture of myself in ChatGPT and asked for a colour consult. Found out what shades suited me, and asked for advise on hair colour & make up tones.

I don't have time (or funds) at the moment for expensive beauty treatments, so I dye and wax my eyebrows twice a month at home. I do an everything shower twice a week, and chuck lavender oil in the shower drain so it smells nice. I don't have time for an extensive skin care routine but I wash and moisturise twice a day. I put brow & lash mascara on while my kids eat breakfast. I file my nails and push my cuticles twice a week, and moisturise my hands at least twice a day if I can.

Yes I really feel this 4 months post baby #2. Gained 2 stone after dc1 and never lost it. Hair is shedding and is really limp. Bought myself some new skincare products last week but I agree with others, until I’ve lost some weight I think il find it hard to feel good in my own skin.

Two years of back-to-back pregnancy and motherhood can completely strip away your sense of yourself, especially when you’re exhausted and touched out.

What helped me wasn’t a big ‘glow up’ so much as a few small things that made me feel more like me again. For me that was getting my hair dyed, keeping my nails done, having my lashes done, and getting my brows tattooed so I didn’t have to think about my face every morning. I even got a new tattoo, which sounds small but really helped me feel like my body was mine again.

None of it changed my body, but it changed how I felt in it and that made getting dressed, going out and facing the day feel less heavy.

It doesn’t have to be all at once. One thing at a time can make a surprisingly big difference when you’re feeling low. Be kind to yourself – you’ve had a lot of change in a very short space of time.