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Original poster

Struggling with postpartum anxiety already

3 replies

april25mama · 02/05/2025 17:48

Hi all

hoping someone who has been through similar (I’m sure there are lots of you!) might be able to share some advice. I had my baby boy at 38 weeks 11 days ago and he’s absolutely perfect - I love him so much. But my anxiety has been unbearable practically since he was born and feels like it’s getting worse every day.

I’m a generally anxious person, especially when it comes to health, so this really isn’t a shock to me. But I feel on edge constantly. I feel like I’m not enjoying the ‘newborn bubble’ because I’m SO scared something bad might happen or something is wrong with him. I am obsessed with watching his breathing. He had fluid in his chest when born so his breathing was erratic at first which was horrible to see but it’s ok now - but due to him being early term he sometimes breathes a bit faster / harder than a baby born later would. I have the owlet sock but find myself obsessing over the numbers. I also really struggle with trusting my partner to have him in the other room for a couple of hours while I get some sleep which is just an awful thing to even admit out loud because he is a great dad - I just can’t shake the thought of him accidentally falling asleep with him on his chest or the baby falling asleep upright and suffocating or something. My partner already has a child from a previous relationship and my anxiety is really offending him and making him feel put down which is totally fair. I feel awful.

what did you do to help your PPA? I really don’t want to take meds if possible because of them passing through breast milk (I am EBF) but this is becoming unbearable and I’m even more exhausted than I should be. I mentioned to my midwife who said I need to just trust my partner otherwise he will stop offering and I’ll end up doing everything on my own. I mentioned to my health visitor who said to download a meditation app which is fine but it’s not really touching the sides on this. Any advice super welcome. I feel like an absolute lunatic but I just can’t help these racing and intrusive thoughts!! Forgotten what it feels like to not be ‘on edge’.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
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Btowngirl · 02/05/2025 18:03

Hi OP, how long ago did you have him? I had such anxiety but not in exactly the same way you describe. To be honest I was worried we had made a mistake which is horrible to say now (she is 6m and the best). I had to be so open with my partner about how I was feeling so that we both knew where I was coming from in certain irrational situations. It passed a lot by 4 weeks when I was able to make it through the day without crying and by 6 weeks I felt almost completely like myself.

In terms of meds, plenty of women take medications safely when EBF. The breastfeeding network has great info on what is and isn’t safe to take and your GP would need to know your are BF in order to prescribe something suitable (IF you go down this route). There are no prizes for muddling through but I do also think it’s relevant how soon PP you are to know if it’s time to address that side.

One of the best bits of advice I’ve had is ‘don’t become the expert of the baby’ which is basically similar to what your midwife is saying. You know your husband is a great dad so try and remind yourself of this during those moments, the last thing you want to do is create more work for yourself when you could have great support from DH. Like I said though, do be up front with him so he can understand where you’re coming from/reassure you (even if you both know it’s irrational from anxiety).

Original poster
april25mama · 02/05/2025 19:32

Btowngirl · 02/05/2025 18:03

Hi OP, how long ago did you have him? I had such anxiety but not in exactly the same way you describe. To be honest I was worried we had made a mistake which is horrible to say now (she is 6m and the best). I had to be so open with my partner about how I was feeling so that we both knew where I was coming from in certain irrational situations. It passed a lot by 4 weeks when I was able to make it through the day without crying and by 6 weeks I felt almost completely like myself.

In terms of meds, plenty of women take medications safely when EBF. The breastfeeding network has great info on what is and isn’t safe to take and your GP would need to know your are BF in order to prescribe something suitable (IF you go down this route). There are no prizes for muddling through but I do also think it’s relevant how soon PP you are to know if it’s time to address that side.

One of the best bits of advice I’ve had is ‘don’t become the expert of the baby’ which is basically similar to what your midwife is saying. You know your husband is a great dad so try and remind yourself of this during those moments, the last thing you want to do is create more work for yourself when you could have great support from DH. Like I said though, do be up front with him so he can understand where you’re coming from/reassure you (even if you both know it’s irrational from anxiety).

Thanks so much for the response. It’s only been 11 days so I guess I’m right in the thick of PP hormones & exhaustion. I have an appt with my GP next week for a blood test so will mention it then and see what they advise. I guess if the meds could just take away the constant on edge feeling it would be something. Although a part of me worries that me worrying less = I’ll miss something. Crazy right!!??

OP posts:
Ros2023 · 16/05/2025 18:44

april25mama · 02/05/2025 19:32

Thanks so much for the response. It’s only been 11 days so I guess I’m right in the thick of PP hormones & exhaustion. I have an appt with my GP next week for a blood test so will mention it then and see what they advise. I guess if the meds could just take away the constant on edge feeling it would be something. Although a part of me worries that me worrying less = I’ll miss something. Crazy right!!??

Show quote history

How are you doing? I just wanted to write on here to say that I am 2 weeks postpartum and I am feeling so nervy and anxious everyday so you aren’t alone. I’m just trying to go with the motions and remember I only gave birth 2 weeks ago my body and life is adjusting and my hormones are still all over. As well as 2 weeks of visitors, appointments, lack of sleep and getting to know my new baby.
it’s such a horrible feeling being on edge all of the time but I’m hoping soon things start to calm down. Sending love your way xxx

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