Sex after birth

[Nelliepledge]

Just some advice please!

Had a vaginal birth with an episiotomy 4 months ago now...and still havnt had sex yet. For a number of reasons which I'm sure you can all understand! Mostly low libido and very apprehensive of how things feel down there now.

Well we tried last night and I felt some pain so we had to stop. We had lube etc but it just felt uncomfortable. Just a little worried now!

Has anyone experienced this? ☹️

Yep, I was told breastfeeding can cause dryness. Our sex life was pretty crap for a year, mostly because we had to use a lot of lube and it kind of takes the fun out of it if you are worried it’ll hurt! Try every now and then gently and see how you go. I think my husband thought we’d be back to normal after 6 weeks- he got a shock!!!

My baby is 6 months old now, I also had an episiotomy and tear during birth. We tried at about 7 weeks PP and it just wasn’t doable as it was so sore although I don’t know if part of this was me thinking it would hurt so I was almost tense waiting for pain! We took it really slow for awhile, lots of lube, lots of foreplay, making sure I was really relaxed and “ready” and just went slowly, slowed down or stopped if I felt any pain. After a month or so of building gradually it was perfectly fine! I’d also say depending on where they cut for your episiotomy some positions may be less painful than others, mine was sort of off to the side so I found that having sex in a spooning position was painful and still sometimes is as it feels like it aggravates the scar so we don’t do that, but other positions don’t and cause pain at all! You may have already done this but try with something smaller (if you know what I mean) rather than going straight for PIV sex, even for your mind if nothing else as for me it was definitely partly a mental thing I was expecting pain so the more times we did something with no pain the less I was worrying about it!