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Postnatal health

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Pain resuming sex after episiotomy?

3 replies

Mrsttcno1 · 18/06/2024 09:08

Hi everyone, I was unsure where to put this so hoping postnatal health is okay.

I’m a little over 8 weeks postpartum, I had an episiotomy and also tore elsewhere during birth (forceps delivery) and have been resuming some sexual activities over the last few weeks and all had been going okay, but we are really struggling with actual PIV sex. It’s really quite painful when we have tried so have just had to abandon it. I’ve had a look online and I know the NHS website says this is common after an episiotomy and doesn’t last forever but does anyone have any advice on how you get that improvement? Is there any tips, anything you can do to help this along, or is it just a case of time?

I have been checked and everything is fully healed thankfully but it just feels very tight and sore when we try and I’m terrified that I’m going to tear although I know that is probably just in my head!

Would just like to add my husband has not and would never put any pressure on me with this whatsoever, it is very much me wanting to try and figure this out!

OP posts:
WhyamInotvomiting · 18/06/2024 09:14

It's just time probably. We didn't resume having intercourse until 9 months PP, I still had pain even on the outside until well past 6 months. From 9 months with help of physio too it was fine.

SkeletonBatsflyatnight · 18/06/2024 09:22

Are you breastfeeding? Sex was very painful for me whilst breastfeeding both mine. Apparently it is very much a thing due to lower estrogen and the tightness/soreness you describe definitely match my experience.

In case it is the episiotomy scar, gentle scar massage might help as part of foreplay and /or using lube

Mrsttcno1 · 18/06/2024 09:39

Thank you @WhyamInotvomiting

Yes I am still breastfeeding @SkeletonBatsflyatnight so maybe that is why! I didn’t know that so it might just be that but I will try the scar massage just incase! It’s a really strange kind of pain to try and describe other than it just feels really tight which I think is what is causing the soreness because the area/scar isn’t painful to touch at all if that makes sense? So I don’t have any pain there in general but when trying to have sex it does almost immediately hurt x

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