Hi
I had to create this thread because last year I ended up with severe postnatal depression which I attribute to my poor baby crying near constant despite cuddling, rocking, co sleeping etc. If anything my baby hated being held more but being put down also led to crying. They had a very difficult temperament until they were around 1 year old. I found life to be physical and mental torture and am sad to say that I frequently felt suicidal. I frequented these boards for tips, reassurance and constant desperation.
I was so sad with life. Did not see a way out and wondered how I would go on and cope with the constant lack of sleep, poor weaning and constant worries about developmental problems due to the extent of my childs upset and their unfortunately very miserable temperament.
I read peoples stories and seen people come back and say things get better, things all work out, that life will not always be life this. I believed it but whole heartedly felt this would not be the case for me or my child because there was something very wrong and that nobodys experience could be like this. I would sit with envy for a year watching other mums with their smiley babies and ache for what they had. I digress
I tell you all this because I am sat in the bath and a song played from that time which took me back to it all. Realistically I know I loathed nearly all of it apart from the very brief joyful moments where I treasured the occasional laugh etc. But I felt a positive feeling of nostalgia and missing it even though I know I would never choose to go back to that time. I seen people state this on these boards and thought "that will absolutely not happen to me" and yet it has. So just incase you were like me feeling desperate and suicidal I feel like a new person now my child is 18months and am mostly enjoying so much of motherhood and my child. I know it is so hard to believe and thinking how can I get through 1 more hour of this never mind 1 year but honestly just take one day at a time and you will find things just change. Please dont give up. Things will get so much more beautiful and easier. I know it is easy to say and sounds smug but I promise you I cried all the time when people told me "when they get to 6 weeks, when they get to 3 months, when they get to 6 months, when they get to 9 months....." and I thought but I will never cope that long but you do and you miss some of it in some strange way. The cliche has been true for me and I hope it is for you too.
All my love and solidarity with you all xx